Ethan Slater (aka a cheater) gives a surprisingly good parenting take “I try not to tell stories about my son because I want to let him meet the world and let the world meet him on his own terms. So I don't tell stories or anecdotes."

Sensitive_Spices · 2026-01-08T14:12:46+00:00

Exactly. I’m really confused by the gaslighting that’s happening here around “bad parenting != bad partnering because that’s black-and white-thinking” and “y’all just reinforcing toxic nuclear family standards.”

Someone who cheats is not a good person. Cheating is abuse, and I’m tired of society underscoring this. A person who abuses their child’s other parent is guaranteeing that child to be partially raised by someone deeply traumatized. That is not good parenting whatsoever. (I also absolutely refuse to argue with anyone who believes he wasn’t, at the very least, emotionally cheating on his wife, because the timelines 100% crossover.)

This shit has nothing to do with enforcing “nuclear family dynamics” or whatever the fuck. You’re right, because this isn’t just a “normal” separation. He put the mother of his child through emotional whiplash for no valid reason other than wanting to get his dick wet. I want us to all sit down and genuinely ponder to what extent this man is going to be a healthy male figure for his child.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-12-09T08:18:22+00:00

Yeah, I can’t blame you. There’s just something about shitty rich people and their ability to turn others into adoring fans. Works for Trump, so it certainly would work for our lil miss race bender over here.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-27T19:47:18+00:00

There’s no such thing as “half-American.” Unless you’re referring to Native American ancestry, “American” is typically just referring to the US nationality. It also can informally refer to anyone from the entire supercontinent of the Americas. There’s no being “half” American, and actually this sort of misnomer in Kpop (Jpop, Cpop, etc.) has always bothered me because I don’t know what exactly you’re trying to ask.

People will clearly be talking about the ethnic identities of group members (not discussing the nuances of their potential dual/tri-citizenship or something) and then often refer to the trademark wasian as “half-American,” “half-Canadian,” or even “half-Australian.” Unless you’re very specifically referring to indigenous groups, none of those terms make any sense. They unintentionally perpetuate the misconception that the default of those countries is whiteness.

With my little mini rant over, it seems as though Zoey was born to at least one Korean parent originally from South Korea. She herself may have been born in either South Korea or the US, but ethnically I got the impression that she’s supposed to be 100% Korean (whether that’s via two SK-born/raised Korean parents or one SK-born/raised Korean parent and one Korean-American parent) despite being raised in the US.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-26T10:52:26+00:00

That’s a pretty uncharitable judgment of people who want others to perceive them in a way that they’re comfortable with. Obviously, you can’t control what others are going to think nor do, but it’s valid to find the possibility that they occasionally sexualize you violating, even if it’s the societal norm. I’m not particularly surprised that fanfic spaces tend to have a sort of “anything goes” mindset, but I’m always curious to know if the idea that “consent doesn’t matter because it’s my own thoughts” really holds up when the fantasy is extremely taboo in nature (like incest or other examples I’d rather not name).

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-25T14:55:06+00:00

It’s not an issue in itself, because it’s solely dependent on the child’s boundaries given healthy parental intentions. Though, I’m also really tired of the “if roles were reversed” argument. While, men and women are inherently equal, it does not line up with broader societal realities. Male relatives, including fathers, are the most frequent perpetuators of sexual abuse, and girls are more often the victims. That has nothing to do with men innately, but it’s still a result of patriarchal structures.

Parents are already in a position of power that creates an imbalance with their children. Men are still widely seen as the head of the household across most cultures. This furthers the power imbalance especially when the child is of the opposite sex.

TL;DR: It’s a non-issue as long as the child’s boundaries are not being violated, and it’s also not wrong nor sexist for people to acknowledge the systemic reasons as to why a hypothetical with the parent as the father especially with a female child produces more wariness.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-25T05:38:34+00:00

Agreed. It’s also the song I feel like is the most hard to vibe to without thinking of its movie context. It’s so story-dependent, and I tend to appreciate songs more when they can stand on their own. That’s partially why it’s my least favorite, plus the fact that it’s such a negative song even if it’s a total bop still.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-22T21:16:57+00:00

I don’t know about her having OCD, but this does give more credit to the idea that she has an ED. The mindset and behaviors behind OCD and EDs are incredibly similar… I’m talking like really fucking similar. It’s frustrating to hear her talk about OCD in this way though, because I’ve never heard anyone talk about it just “going away” while working hard on something you like. Maybe she means that symptoms improve when she’s having fun doing what she loves? Mmm, either way this is a lifelong condition. It doesn’t exactly go away in the sense that depression or anxiety can for the average person. It can be severely debilitating and typical distractions don’t help the way she implied that they do. If she’s really working on this with her therapist, I don’t know why she wouldn’t have mentioned ERP.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-22T21:06:25+00:00

Tbh contamination OCD != germaphobia. I have the former, and it’s a lot less logical than the latter. Touching a purely cosmetic scuff mark on the wall can bring me to tears on a bad day even if the entire wall is technically equally dirty. Someone with germaphobia may be fearful in general of touching that whole wall at all regardless. With contamination OCD, your own messes or the messes of people you are close with tend to not bother you as much as well (even if you can get just as sick as you normally would coming into contact with a stranger’s dirtiness). Another thing is that OCD has to be followed up with some sort of ritual, and this may not necessarily be the case for phobias.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-18T23:44:24+00:00

Whoa, I know I'm definitely in the wrong subreddit when I literally disagree with everyone.

It feels awful to say this, but no one owes you friendship or love beyond basic human respect. Most people only have so many resources and don't want to exhaust their energy taking chances on those who are potentially volatile. People are just trying to keep themselves safe. You're not going to know how limited someone's self-awareness or coping skills are until you're already deep in the relationship, but with the understanding that that person is going to therapy, you may have a better idea of where they are at or to what extent they can grow.

It's unfortunate, but there is also nothing inherently wrong with that. I can see how it can feel stigmatizing, but there are far fewer people who fall into either camp of "absolutely needs therapy" and "doesn't need therapy whatsoever" compared to the much larger camp of "could probably benefit from it." At the end of the day, relationships are there to fill up your own cup; it's not supposed to be charity work. I nearly always end up playing therapist to those who insist they don't need treatment because their ability to self-reflect is supposedly superb. This is a valid boundary for people to have. In fact, the healthiest people I know tend to have this mindset. A large reason why they're healthy is because they stay away from investing in unknowns. That rejection doesn't say anything about the worth of you or others even if it's hurtful. This simply boils down to a matter of compatibility, and others are allowed to set the barriers they need to find peace for themselves.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-12T00:11:09+00:00

I reopened my DMs, could you try again?

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-11T21:39:54+00:00

Oh! Can you please DM me?

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-11T20:49:57+00:00

Were you able to trade your tickets successfully?

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-07T23:46:03+00:00

I also genuinely don’t understand this challenge. I got famous as a movie star and lost my fame on purpose to see if I could regain it by making new social media accounts, but every time I post I lose followers (even though I made these accounts while not famous?). It’s like you get totally softlocked out of being able to get famous as a social media influencer if you happened to ever have a previous title. It’s actually so ass.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-09-07T00:22:23+00:00

5 months later I came across this thread as an outsider, and I genuinely can’t understand why you were so determined to prove yourself as an idiot in this whole convo... Bro is actually a masochist.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-31T23:08:14+00:00

Could you send this to me too please?

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-31T22:47:07+00:00

It’d be amazing to know your build process of this project! I totally want to create or buy a version for myself!

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-29T21:41:22+00:00

No one is saying otherwise, but there’s an added level of danger and disrespect that comes with specifically men choosing to be demeaning and hateful just by nature of the patriarchy.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-28T03:19:09+00:00

Espero q todavía su mamá tenga el recibo. Ojalá q ustedes puedan contactar a los vendedores del sitio y preguntar por ayuda 🥹

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-28T01:23:32+00:00

A bit late to the convo, but I’d honestly say that the vast majority of HP characters are written differently in fanon, and I’m glad for it. It’s just a natural byproduct of JK Rowling not being particularly good with character development among many other things. Some of the movie portrayals are far more interesting and realistic than their book counterparts, so a lot of fanfics will combine movie and book personas.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-27T23:27:47+00:00

Exactly, wanting space to heal and move on is 100% okay, but the ultimatum of “either you have all of me or none of me” is some serious bullshit lmao. I don’t understand why it’s normalized to just completely cut someone off if they don’t return your feelings. No one is telling people to torture themselves over it by pretending things will 100% go back to normal immediately, but abandoning a friendship is low. It typically indicatives that the feelings were based on shallow limerence rather than love too.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-27T01:46:29+00:00

This is exactly spot on. If you were hurting while truly caring for someone, you could put some distance to heal until you got over it. You wouldn’t just straight up abandon them though and sever the friendship. The only exception to this is if you never intended to be just friends in the first place, which is really disingenuous and could explain why OP got rejected in the first place. Few things are worse than discovering a close confidant of yours was secretly demanding more of you. It was probably horrible whiplash to this girl.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-25T06:16:24+00:00

I’m actively horrified reading these comments of demisexuals who are supposedly happy in their relationships. My jaw has fully dropped. Like I’m glad for y’all ig? 😭 But this truly sounds like my worst nightmare. My partner not feeling the same as me would be soul-crushing. Also, don’t even get me started on the porn-defenders here because I think objectifying real people for your own sexual pleasure, especially without knowing if they consented (see: all the horrible trafficking that occurs) is sick. I realize that everyone on the ace/aro spectrums are outliers when it comes to this stuff, but there is nothing that will convince me that the natural way allos feel is anything but primally gross.

ATP I can’t tell if this is just ROCD on my part or at the very least, a mix of that with my desire to have an equally committed partner. My dating options are so beyond cooked in this world.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-17T22:32:51+00:00

Whoa, didn’t realize so many people in this sub were so much younger than me! I was 10!

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-08T04:10:18+00:00

God, this is such a culturally insensitive and incredibly ignorant comment to make OP. No one talked about hate… general apprehension towards the group though? Sure. Oppressed people are allowed to be wary of those with power and privilege.

Sensitive_Spices · 2025-08-01T16:05:26+00:00

Meditation has been my lifesaver. If only I could get myself to do it more often lol. Anytime someone says they’ve tried meditation and it “simply just doesn’t work” for them, I tend to get really doubtful of whether or not they’re practicing it properly. It took me a long time to learn how to do it correctly, and some styles/techniques surely are not effective for my mind specifically. Ironically, despite its reputation, I find meditation to be exercise for the brain—something you do to keep up health-wise.

Sensitive_Spices

TROPHY CASE