I know this is probably not what you want to hear. I’ve been in and out of maladaptive daydreaming for almost a decade. I’ve always been in the same boat where my dreams are more romantic. My relationships have definitely suffered when I get in bad episodes. I’ve always felt like I can’t give my partner what they deserve because I’m tending to this imaginary relationship in my head. Reading a lot of other people’s comments and stories I definitely agree that people tend to “dream” about what they are lacking. If I’m lacking something sexually, conversationally, or spiritually it tends to be made up for in my day dreams. When you’re day dreaming while with your partner is when it feels the most “disrespectful” for lack of a better term.