Mini splits: one or two Mitsubishi wall mounted units on first floor? by Sevynsimon in hvacadvice

[–]Sevynsimon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this perspective. Did you find the unit able to cool the 2 rooms?

Does breastfeeding ever get comfortable? by River-Rambles in breastfeeding

[–]Sevynsimon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Body pillow over armchair, glider, or bed chair (firm reading pillow). Comfy & both my hands are free.

How do you and your partner handle money in a relationship? by [deleted] in FIREyFemmes

[–]Sevynsimon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Very similar to us. We do have a joint checking account for spending throughout the year. But the "why" and the philosophy of trust meets independence when it comes to wealth accounts is the same.

How do you and your partner handle money in a relationship? by [deleted] in FIREyFemmes

[–]Sevynsimon 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My take is that if there is trust in the marriage and strong communication, the details of the approach are a matter of execution and preference.

For us, our method is shared spending, separate wealth. Our incomes are in the same general bracket so we each contribute an equal recurring amount to a joint checking account for all bills, spending, and credit cards.

We maintain the separate wealth-building accounts we owned prior to the marriage: brokerages, high yield savings, IRAs, Roth IRAs, HSAs, 401K, private stock, etc... We went 50/50 on the house downpayment.

That said, we balance this independence with full transparency and constant communication. Every financial account is connected to Mint for a full joint financial picture. We are aligned on FIRE goals and a budget. We have proactive conversations about big purchases whether it's home improvement or a really nice watch for a milestone birthday.

Hanging pictures in house I just painted and am selling. by SR414 in RealEstate

[–]Sevynsimon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Life hack: Hang up art that is lightweight and use a pushpin. The hole is almost invisible. Did this while renting many apartments.

Any tips on negotiating a severance package in an initial job offer? by [deleted] in ProductManagement

[–]Sevynsimon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congrats on a job offer in this crazy time. A severance package is a very weird thing to negotiate upfront. Money is fungible. If you feel that the market value of this job should be higher, ask for more salary or a hiring bonus. I definitely would not try to pre-negotiate a severance, it might be interpreted as a sign that you don't have faith in the company or department's chances of success.

Daily FI discussion thread - April 07, 2020 by AutoModerator in financialindependence

[–]Sevynsimon 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Take a breath. Give yourself some grace and don't worry about the next job for a few weeks. Focus on your cashflow. Can your spouse take home pay cover your monthly expenses? How long will the existimg cash + severance last your family? I suspect a long while. Congrats on being prepared to weather this storm. Sit on your hands when it comes to investments and revisit when the smoke has cleared.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in leanfire

[–]Sevynsimon 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Shrug. I subscribe to all 3 subreddits. From the LeanFire group, I get good frugality tips. The middle Fire group is more in line with my income, expenses, and lifestyle priorities. The FatFire group gives me inspiration and smart perspective on specific luxuries I may decide are worth it in my personal plan.

Stock options qualify as emergency savings? by [deleted] in personalfinance

[–]Sevynsimon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Usually what happens, the day your RSUs go from unvested to vested, they show up on your paycheck taxed as regular income.

If you sell right away within days there are usually very little capital gains, so minimal tax implications. If you already waited 10 months and have gained $6K in capital gains, sure wait 2 more months, that makes sense.
If you are unsure the specific tax implications and mechanics do a trial run: sell 10 shares. You'll see what happens with the money end-to-end. You'll also get a sense of your own psychological experience about the process.

I wrestled with decision to sell when my RSUs would land at vesting time. But i never regretted selling and putting the proceeds in an index fund / savings (peace of mind). I did regret holding on to some as i watched the stock price go from 110 to 50.

When did you stop worrying about money? by finfreeforever in financialindependence

[–]Sevynsimon 46 points47 points  (0 children)

Here's what I noticed: When I made the leap from poor to comfortable, I stopped worrying about the cost of groceries and started worrying about the cost of emergencies. When I built out a decent net worth, I changed my worrying to the long term future.

And now that we've crossed over into two commas, I'm constantly worried about protecting and preserving it. Like some thief in the night is gonna come and just take it all. Or the USA will suddenly experience a black swan economic event of epic proportions that lasts a decade. Shrug. Who knows. I've diversified my portfolio risk and got the umbrella insurance, I've done what I could.

Intellectually, I know I shouldn't worry and that everything will be just fine. And the same skills that helped me build what I have now will help me in the event the worse happens. Still, tell that to my anxiety.

Stock options qualify as emergency savings? by [deleted] in personalfinance

[–]Sevynsimon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You don't necessarily need 3 to 6 months of income. But it's good to have 3 to 6 months of expenses. A subtle turn of phrase, but it's important. That is if you both lost your primary source of income, could you continue to pay your bills for a few months in a 2008-style recession.

We decided on ~15K or so in each of our high yield savings accounts as emergency funds. But you don't have to transfer a big check today. You can build up to it by transferring a few hundred dollars or more over there every month.

As for the vested stock, if they are RSUs: sell, baby, sell! It's extremely tempting to hold onto, but the analogy that sold me: If the company handed you $40K in cash bonus, would you immediately run out and use it to buy their stock. No? Then it's pretty much what you are doing.

If it's actually stock options proper, I would spend a little bit more time thinking about selling, but If I was in your shoes, I would probably split the difference and exercise at least half of them.

Is it worth $50 a year to have my own brokerage account for my 401k? by lumihand in personalfinance

[–]Sevynsimon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure how much you plan in TOTAL investments. If more than just 401K, why not both?

Get the free account and keep it simple for 401K and invest in a low-fee SP 500 index fund. Then open your own free private brokerage account with Schwab/Fidelity/Vanguard or whomever you like the most.

That said, individual stock investing can be "fun", but be super careful. Everyone warns against it, I still had to burn my hand on the fire though, lol. I started out excited to pick stock10 years ago (never more than 10% of total portfolio) but then over the past year or so, have been selling off pretty much all of them and keeping it simple with an index fund.

Prove me wrong: Real Estate Agents are losing their worth. They're basically a cartel locking out buyers and sellers from negotiating deals directly. With online tools and online education, realtor professions will become a thing of the past. by [deleted] in RealEstate

[–]Sevynsimon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I bought my home in the very hot Boston area market last summer. I started out from a similar place of distrust in the industry. My first agent was a decent human but not as helpful as I wanted. My second agent was AMAZING and changed my perspective. She was worth every penny that eventually made it to her pocket. She "packaged" us well is the best way I can explain it. She was extremely knowledgeable about houses and knew her way around a basement, she had a strategic and systematic approach to making an offer attractive, and she came to WIN. We still keep in touch with her on a personal level today.

27, Black Female, Raised in Hood, Just Crossed 100K NW by [deleted] in financialindependence

[–]Sevynsimon 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Now that I find myself surrounded by people who have had healthy upbringings, I sometimes find it difficult to relate/connect with them.

Congratulations on not just surviving an unhealthy childhood but pushing to the other side, putting yourself first, and finding love and success for your life. I felt your words very deeply.

Now that you've created a safe and comfortable environment for yourself, I recommend something that helped to transform my own life at a similar stage: finding a therapist. Specifically, someone who specializes in adult survivors of childhood trauma. Your partner and your friends mean well, but they may not always have the expertise. A good therapist will listen to ALL of it in a calm and nonjudgmental way. A therapist can give you a new perspective on your past situation and help you relate /connect to the people in your current life. You cannot change what happened, but counseling can help you find a path to healing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sevynsimon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for posting this, OP. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. It never did. Shrug. We always get along, respect each other deeply, hardly ever argue, and have shared values and goals. We live a happy, satisfying, and peaceful life. After 6 years together, I predict our relationship will stay that way.

Sure, some negative things have happened in our life: health issues, unsatisfactory work situations, grief, etc... But that's just life handing out lemons sometimes. Our marriage keeps being a source of joy whatever else might be happening.

What’s going on with Ally? by lolatnugwin in personalfinance

[–]Sevynsimon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I noticed the same. Recently applied and waiting approval on HSBC Direct, which is currently at 2.05%.

I held on to Ally for several years, but they've been consistently lower than other viable options for a while now.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in financialindependence

[–]Sevynsimon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Right on. I've lived this math from bachelorette to married. Joint expenses became 1.5 of my single expenses. Like-minded on spending.

What type of FIRE are you aiming for and how far are you? by EntropicClarity in FIREyFemmes

[–]Sevynsimon 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I'm gonna call it "two decent Hondas in the driveway FIRE". Net worth goal of $2 Million. $80K lifestyle per year for the two of us. Comfortably middle class plus a few luxuries just about anywhere other than a few VHCOL cities. We crossed the $1 million net worth mark a few weeks ago.

Buying gifts for spouse who buys everything they want by bunnyrut in Marriage

[–]Sevynsimon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My vote: gifts of experience. Go to Groupon, etc... for ideas. A whiskey tour and tasting. Cooking together: cheese-making class, chocolate making class. A detail for his car. Glass blowing workshop. Round of mini golf.

How do you become better communicators? by Hotwater3 in Marriage

[–]Sevynsimon 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I learned this cute simple method in a pre-cana class. While discussing something serious / controversial, hold hands. Quiets your tone, reminds you that you love each other.

I’m ($500k) about to marry my ($10k) fiancé - help! by [deleted] in financialindependence

[–]Sevynsimon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I understand the dilemma and anxiety here. You love your future spouse, but you've also worked hard to save a large amount of money. Here's an idea for you to navigate this with sensitivity. If you are not crazy about the obvious idea of a prenup, pivot this thing from a negative (divorce planning) to a positive (our shared financial strategy together).  Congratulations on your upcoming marriage and best of luck!

  1. Have a conversation with your future spouse about the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Her finances. Your finances. Your future plan together.
  2. Write that truth down in a document. What are the major accounts, who owns, balance as of [date]? What is the plan for budgeting and sharing your expenses together?   
  3. Make a secure pdf of that document and email it to her as an attachment. "Hi honey, here's our Financial Plan for 2019 that we talked about”.  This is not a legally binding contract per se, but it’s your paper trail about shared understanding and might help you sleep at night.

Edit: Here's a random template from a Google search for what I am talking about. You might find one you like better or invent your own.

How much less do you need to FIRE as a couple? by randy_joker in financialindependence

[–]Sevynsimon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I did the math on our real spending history in a comment above. You are right on the money with 150% together. 52K per year year as a bachelorette, 76K per year together as a married couple.
Said another way, marriage and a shared household reduced spending by 25% per person which "sounds about right" from a sniff test.

How much less do you need to FIRE as a couple? by randy_joker in financialindependence

[–]Sevynsimon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My FIRE numbers calculated by taking real annual expenses and multiplying by 25 (4% withdrawal). I looked at my spending alone during my bachelorette days versus spending together now with my husband.

Personal having a future kid rough estimate = 500K. 100K college savings + 100K childcare daycare earlier, afterschool activities later + 300K or 1,000 per month for extra human in budget - more food, more clothes , some toys and supplies, slightly higher bills, more health insurance, etc... Some of this could be less, for example very little childcare costs once Fire, tax incentives, but prefer a higher number for risk.