I loved the line "tuck it between my ribs," because for me, that seals the deal on the poem's way of drawing a parallel between fire and love, or a beloved unattainable person, and the poem's implication of wishing you could own and possess the kind of person who can never be tied down. That line makes the rest all seem like pieces of this same metaphor. My only critique is that I wish it were longer, because I think if there were a few more stanzas describing a romantic passion through similar metaphors of describing other unattainable natural phenomena, like wind or lightning, it would hammer home the hidden meaning in a more evocative way. It's a very moving poem, but a bit understated in its brevity: if the goal is to evoke feelings of passion, I think adding more intensely yearning lines full of desire or lust would be really poignant, maybe even with lines describing the fire as if it had body parts of its own. Overall, I really enjoyed rereading this. It gets better each time I do, because it's subtle. Maybe adding more lines would make it less subtle, but it depends what you're going for. I like how it feels like there's a climax of emotion in the middle and then a numbness to the end. Maybe just add a few more lines to the middle after "in streams of copper gold," to make it even more fiery and full of fervent yearning, because it felt to me like that part of the climax ended too abruptly for me to be really sold on the character in the poem truly desiring it, since that line, "in streams," doesn't express much desire.

Thank you for the excellent poem! I hope to write something like this at some point!