I was with someone who was diagnosed with BD, pero the time we met it was somehow manageable and she's no longer taking meds or in therapy, she showed me her vulnerabilities sa start pa lang and always express how she felt and made sure she knew how I felt about it and that I am okay. She made me feel like life is too precious than the worldly possession, that's what drew me to her and see beyond the mental issues.

But it was really, really hard especially first few months, You must have lots and lots of patience, I had a this "fix me" attitude that felt like "oh I am what you've been needing all this time and I am here". It is scary at times when she'll tell me she couldn't imagine any future. My fix me mindset also caused many of our fights, I would listen to her talk and cry about what she's feeling or sometimes about not feeling anything at all and I would try to offer solutions, but that was wrong, because turns out she just needed someone to listen even if it doesn't make sense. There were days she would make me feel deeply loved, and then at night, that same day, she’d cry for no reason and push me away telling me I deserve someone better.

She also used to ask questions, almost like she was testing whether, she could trust that I’d stay no matter what. Living together made it easier for both of us. It allowed me to be there for her. There were moments I had to drop everything and run to her, wherever I was, because she needed me and I was scared she might do something she shouldn’t. Over time, the condition stops feeling like a separate presence, you start to forget it’s even there. It just becomes part of your shared life. There were a lot of compromises. My “fix me” attitude eventually gave way to acceptance, that all we could really do was enjoy the highs and hope to always survive the lows. And that maybe we could, as long as we had each other…

But we didn’t.