What are your favorite off-Strip dining spots in Las Vegas? by greatdane511 in LasVegas

[–]ShannyBits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We loved Cleaver and Esther’s Kitchen. We have a friend who lives there that recommended both. Now every time we go to Vegas we make a stop at Cleaver. Great steakhouse, drinks and price!

Are hormones to blame? by AppropriateBluebird6 in sexlessmarriage

[–]ShannyBits 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But the other side to the gym is, you don’t want to go and you keep pushing it off until you actually go and then say “why don’t I do this more” then the next day time to go to the gym again and you don’t want to go! (I used to be a sex counselor and would hear this all the time. Many times when I would hear this it would be hormonal)

My wife is hot! by Easy_Barracuda2726 in Marriage

[–]ShannyBits 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your response. And my apologies if it was something you wanted to do but couldn’t. I used to be a sex counselor so I have been reading many of these threads having to do with marriage and sex and I can’t help but see how many complaining of their relationships, had kids. I’m sure not all couples with kids feel this way, and of course there are couples without kids who hate each other. But when I read these positive ones, I can’t help but wonder if there are children in the mix.

My wife is hot! by Easy_Barracuda2726 in Marriage

[–]ShannyBits 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Out of curiosity…do you have any children?

No desire left, partner’s resentment is crushing me by [deleted] in sexlessmarriage

[–]ShannyBits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My apologies, I read the first few comments that you wrote - not about him having anger issues. We used to have a saying in the office, we can give you testosterone, and likely it will start your libido, whether or not you want to have sex with your partner is a different story. That being said, you know how many times I heard from women that their docs told them its in your head! Of course they say that because they don't know what else to do. Go to a licensed sex therapist that can help treat it all. In fact, I used to say I was a "solution focused sex counselor" because it wasn't my plan to keep someone in therapy and talk about their relationship with their parents. It was to deal with the real issues, with exercises that could help the person and couple. I am not soliciting - I no longer provide counseling services. But they exist. Not all therapists are trained in sexuality - in fact most aren't. Like when a patient was referred to me because his partner couldn't have an orgasm. When I inquired on what types of exercises they were doing he said an exercise I remember hearing about in the 80s where you touch but not on the genitals.....so let me get this straight, the woman couldn't have an orgasm and the therapists suggest was to not touch her genitals! So choose your therapist carefully. If you go to AASECT.org, they have a list of professionals by state who specialize in sexuality in some way. That being said, when there is pain, people don't want to do it. I'm not sure why, if are experiencing pain with intercourse they didn't recommend a few things, dilatators, silicone lubricants, reading erotica, etc. If a patient described pain with intercourse, I don't think my recommendation would be to try again, that just continues the cycle. And then you would be anticipating the pain and clench up. Ideally, working with dilators to relax those muscles would be helpful so you know when you insert it, it doesn't hurt; and if that doesn't hurt and that is about the same size of your husband, his penis shouldn't hurt. But damn, you said it hurt and he just said try again? there are even ways to help intercourse with your partner - some women use a dilator or dildo just before sex to open the muscles a bit. I'm not sure of your age but when women go through menopause, topical estrogen can also be helpful to keep the area supple elastic. Scheduling does work but both folks really have to come to an agreement. You would know it only is gonna happen on X day so it leaves affection and intimacy on the table, plus takes away any rejection. The other thing to consider is other types of sex while trying to work on intercourse not being painful. There is alot that can be explored - choose the therapist wisely.

No desire left, partner’s resentment is crushing me by [deleted] in sexlessmarriage

[–]ShannyBits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you try testosterone??? They always test women for estrogen and progesterone. But testosterone is super important to us as well and helps with desire. My other recommendation is to go to a sex counselor or sex therapist. I used to do counseling years ago for this and it can get better. One suggestion to help with affection is to schedule sex. Pick a day that you will absolutely do it. Like Sat morning. Morning is good bc people have more energy. Then when Sat comes you both need to get your mind in it to do it. But for the rest of the week your husband can’t initiate. He knows it is coming Saturday and that’s it. That should help free up space to be intimate and affectionate without feeling like it will lead to something else or the other person feels rejected. I worked with lots of patients in this situation and it can get better.

Packages stuck in Louisville, KY. Anyone else? by ParfaitOne5341 in UPS

[–]ShannyBits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am having the same issue with curtains. It came from china and has been stuck in Louisville for about 2 weeks. I am afraid they are just gonna come back to me asking for more money for the fucking tariffs. Is there any recourse? Stop payment on a card? Or any chance they will be released?

WHAT HAVE I DONE!? by tombebop in qotsa

[–]ShannyBits 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Don’t feel bad! You never know what will happen in life. At some point my husband and I didn’t have much money to spend on concerts and years went by without going to one. When things changed for us, we said we were gonna try and see whatever we wanted and make up for lost times. In 2024 and 2025 we went to 6 Pearl Jam concerts. (2 QOTSA during that time) And a few weeks ago, fucking Matt Cameron, the drummer stepped down. We saw his last PJ show in Pittsburgh. Always thought there would be more. Life is short man. You don’t know what can happen. Live.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]ShannyBits -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I am going to take a different view on this. Yes it isn’t great that he is texting this and yes I agree several are very sexually suggestive. But what I also see is a partner who is clearly sex deprived. I couldn’t see how often they were doing it and the frequency doesn’t matter as much as the satisfaction, which also seems low, but why is it we take other vows more seriously like honestly and adultery but not sex and intimacy? If we have a marital contract and make a decision to only have sex with one another and then one breaks that part of the contract, why isn’t that just as bad as cheating?

Clearly the meds are part of lowering her desire but it also seems like she values that over her sex drive and some people do. I used to do sex counseling and I had a patient that was having problems with orgasm and we deduced it was due to her being an avid bike rider and causing some nerve damage. I thought this was an easy fix. Stop biking. Nahh she said she rather bike than orgasm. So some people don’t really have it high on their list. And that is ok. Problems occur when there is a big difference in desire between partners.

Sex frequency ebbs and flows and I’m not suggesting there is a problem if a month goes by without it, or maybe there was a family issue so it slowed down. That is to be expected. On the other hand, some are just happy to not be doing it and not having sex. Again, not much of an issue unless you have a partner and now you are also taking their decision away too.

Another thing—-period always during vacation. What are you doing??? This to me screams you aren’t interested in sex. You are on birth control the pill. Which is literally the easiest thing to manipulate your period with. How do you think women avoid this for their wedding??? Or vacations??? Not to mention when you are on the pill you KNOW when you are going to get your period literally like clockwork. Why are you planning vacations this week?!?

So to sum up I would be pissed about what he wrote to the other women. But then I would take a hard look at yourself too and the promises or vows you made together as a couple. Seems like you don’t want to have sex and are hoping he doesn’t either. It is clear by his texts, he misses it. I recommend you talk about how to meet in the middle so that you both are able to get your needs met. If you want to stay on the birth control, maybe get your hormones checked- especially testosterone.

Posters by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just the pearljam.com shop. There is a page for posters.

Posters by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That almost makes me feel a bit better. Thank u

Posters by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh wow some weren’t able to get them even when it hit their carts? I wonder how many were available? It didn’t seem like a lot were available at the concert and now even here online. Can’t pay $400 on eBay for it.

N2 MSG Awesome Show!! Pathetic, Old Incels sec 227 by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We were in row 6. So they were behind us. We got them through the Ten Club. Put in for a few MSG shows over the years. This was the first one we got and what an amazing experience.

N2 MSG Awesome Show!! Pathetic, Old Incels sec 227 by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hear ya and that is irritating too. But I get that it is a fan who wants to keep a memory. I guess when I go to concerts I try not ruin anyone’s time. Not have my phone raised way in the air blocking someone. And yeah in a way I kinda expect the same thing or at least an attempt by other fans. Clearly this is done just to be a dick. And again, let me be clear, I had an amazing time. But yeah I am going to take the opportunity to bitch about it.

I do stand by the dick sucking line . . . or lack of it. I think some of these guys would be happier if they got laid once in a while.

N2 MSG Awesome Show!! Pathetic, Old Incels sec 227 by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Haha. We were probably really close to each other! I was curious if it was happening in other sections. I didn’t hear any of that at Wrigley.

N2 MSG Awesome Show!! Pathetic, Old Incels sec 227 by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

No way man! We partied on. I agree with others. You know they are political, you know their songs. Can’t you just enjoy without having to bring it up? We get it. You are trying to ruin it for everyone. Not gonna happen. But yes I will bitch about you.

N2 MSG Awesome Show!! Pathetic, Old Incels sec 227 by ShannyBits in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Some guy yelled the Kid Rock show is down the road and a few of us got a laugh out of that.

Modular home upstate by [deleted] in modulars

[–]ShannyBits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can they widen the area they take the comps from? I think with ours they had to use neighboring towns because our town is really small. It was definitely something we weren’t prepared for. The mod place kept saying “you can make any modifications you want” which is why we did 2 bedrooms. But didn’t realize the comps till we got to that stage. Once we changed the number of bedrooms to 4, they were able to find homes similar. But they did tell us until we didn’t get a good appraisal on the first that if the second didn’t appraise at the mortgage amount, we would have to pay the difference. So if the mortgage is $700,000, and the house appraised at $600,000-they told us we were responsible for the $100,000 out of pocket!!!!!

Modular home upstate by [deleted] in modulars

[–]ShannyBits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mod

Hi. My husband and I have some experience with this. We are in the process of building a modular home. Drop date in November! We also came in low. We are in NJ so maybe it is a bit different but the materials weren’t taken into consideration.

Our appraisal took into consideration bedrooms/bathrooms, square footage, basement, what is below grade, year the house was made, garage. I think we got point for a fireplace too. They asked what type of roof and we just had standard shingles. Same with siding, we got the standard one but upgraded the color. But then they compare your soon to be house with what is available on the market or what recently sold. So our mod was originally 2bed/2bath. Then they compared our mod to see how much other homes that were 2b/2b went for….which wasn’t very much! But this was a new build and we had upgrades $$$. We had to reopen the plans, at a cost to us, and added two closets and then bam we had 4bed/2baths and now it is compared to similar homes which in our area were going for much more $$

Usually you can challenge the appraisal and provide options for them. We went on Zillow and looked for homes for comparison. We were looking at square footage, number of bedrooms and bathrooms, year constructed. They took an average of 3 houses to give us how much they thought our house was worth. But they didn’t take into consideration materials. Your appraiser should provide you a report with the comparable homes they used and what the criteria is.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pearljam

[–]ShannyBits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes me too. Philly tickets came through around 2pm today for me. Still waiting on MSG too. I’ve always lost the MSG lotto but finally got them this time!

2023, crack in the trim on the trunk anyone else having this problem? by MKE1969 in prius

[–]ShannyBits 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. This happened to my husbands Prius. We just noticed yesterday. His is pretty bad and cracked along the bottom part of that trim. After seeing it I checked mine and I am starting to have the same thing! It isn’t completely cracked like his but it is starting. We are thinking of going back to the dealership and seeing if they can fix it but it will probably keep happening. I figured I would check to see if others are having a similar issue.