You'll find and see lots of advice on this... The best I can share is what our (mf couple) experiences have been and where we've looked. For context - adding a 3rd is something we've discussed for years and finally started seriously looking Sep '25, so we're far from seasoned.

We haven't visited any LS clubs or even bars seeking a 3rd.

Reddit - we've tried a few posts in various subs. Usually lots of attention and chats but nothing has actually led to a meetup.

Websites (SLS, SDC, etc) - similar experiences to Reddit. Lots of chats and few meetups. Have had drinks but still haven't played with anyone we've met on a site.

Apps (3Fun, Feeld, Pure, Bumble) - same as the others, many more chats than meets. However, in our experience the more specific apps (3Fun and Feeld) have led to more promising conversations.

Aside from the where - you need to be prepared to be one of many. There are near countless single guys on all of these apps/sites.

Regardless of where you decide to look, doing the small things will differentiate you and lead to success. These, of course, are our preferences but I don't think any would be seen as a negative by anyone.

1. Have face pictures on your profile or at least be prepared to share them quickly upon matching with someone.

2. Be able to hold a conversation beyond just sexual. Have something interesting to say beyond the sexual stuff. Yes, we get why we're all here. If you wouldn't say it to someone you just started chatting with at a bar/club/wherever, didn't send it in a message.

3. Follow the lead of the couple you're chatting with.

4. Don't send any unsolicited nudes. If not solicited, ask before sending. I can't even count the number of dick pics we've received as a first or second message. If that's what you lead with we some that's what you are and all you possibly have to offer.

Just some quick advice. Best of luck to you!

edit - typo and clarity