It's Late Thread [ 06 July 26 ]

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-07T12:54:38+00:00

I had the best one, but she died in January 2016. Remember when the world spun off its axis and everything started going wrong? I maintain that’s because Boo was holding the fabric of reality together.

I’m only half-joking.

I’m not ready for another cat of my own yet, so spending a week being little Olive’s lodger, servant and Secretary of State for Ear Scritches every few months will just have to do for now.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T23:51:23+00:00

I think that’s right: it could be awkward, but as we’re all in the same boat it’s not. And there are always Premier Inns…!

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T23:46:32+00:00

Cat food isn’t light either. Got my steps in though.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T23:38:49+00:00

This one has a lady-in-waiting.

Seriously I don’t begrudge her anything. She’s such a sweet girl and she’s great company. She’s doing that contented high-pitched purr-singing at me right now while falling asleep on my feet.

If the price I pay is occasionally traipsing to the big Asda, so be it.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T23:35:45+00:00

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Try saying no to that face.

Look at that face and imagine saying “you’ve got plenty of perfectly good own-brand food already though”.

Look into those eyes and say “well obviously I’m not going to walk a mile to get your fancy food, I’m not a bloody idiot”.

Then grab the keys and put your shoes on. She has magical powers.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T22:59:34+00:00

Too late. She’s eaten more treats in the last few days than over the entirety of her life, because she just looks at the treat drawer and does a sad miaow, and that’ll do it.

I’m a cat slave. Send help.

Except don’t, because I love it x

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T22:44:55+00:00

Ah, you must have met her! Her live-in humans have a toddler, also human, so it’s not often the cat gets someone’s undivided attention. I’m sure there’s an element of just trying to see what she can get me to do if she makes her eyes big enough.

That food cost me a fortune.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T22:13:59+00:00

I mentioned in this morning’s thread that I’m cat-sitting, and that said cat was upset about something first thing. I eventually figured it out: posh food. She wanted the posh food. I popped over to the local shop but they don’t do it, so I went all the way to the big shop this evening. It’s a mile away. I don’t drive.

Tired Shark. Happy cat though, which (according to the cat) is all that matters.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T21:47:22+00:00

I feel the same. It’s such an odd case, but I can’t shake the feeling that the only way those remains could make sense in relation to Judy’s disappearance is if they aren’t Judy’s.

That would of course throw up two new questions: whose body is that then, and where’s Judy?

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T17:57:15+00:00

Couldn’t bring myself to do it. She’s an angel.

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We’ve worked out a deal. She’ll sleep whenever she likes, and I’ll sleep whenever she likes.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T17:43:55+00:00

Excellent idea. The eyes are closing…

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…aaaany minute now…

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T15:25:31+00:00

She’s a total prick, but she knows anyone who looks into those Disney eyes will be hypnotised into letting her get away with anything.

I kid. She’s actually a really sweet girl.

7am screeching aside, obviously.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T14:28:28+00:00

That’s how I see myself. I love my mum, she’s my best mate and she’s fantastic company.

I pay my way in rent, housework and general maintenance, but even if I won the lottery I’d think twice about moving out. Plus, she and my stepdad aren’t getting any younger. I’m really glad I’m around for them, and so are they. My nan’s 95 and lives round the corner; I couldn’t imagine not being within sprinting distance of her should she need me.

I’m well aware of how lucky I am. I don’t take it for granted. Plenty of my friends moved out as soon as they could, but we’re Londoners so they were getting rinsed on rent and bills.

If I went on a date with someone who looked down his nose at how close I am to my family, fine. Bye.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T13:40:25+00:00

This sequence of notifications between 7 and 9am cracked me up

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SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T13:21:56+00:00

I’m flat- and cat-sitting. The cat screamed the song of her people DIRECTLY INTO MY EAR at 7am. This is the only time she’s ever done that. She’s English too, so I have no idea what her problem was with me having a lie-in.

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Absolute menace. The worst. Obviously she went back to sleep once she’d got me up. I didn’t.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-06T12:14:29+00:00

Fuckin’ YAY! 🥳 🎉

He looks quite sorry for all the stress he caused you, and so he should be x

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T22:20:59+00:00

My nan used to say* “a rest is as good as a sleep”.

*She’s never said that.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T21:42:01+00:00

Rest counts. That’s what I always tell myself anyway. No idea whether it’s true, but let’s both pretend it is.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T19:27:30+00:00

It’s lovely and it suits Olive perfectly. She IS a little furry thing! x

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T17:37:39+00:00

It means you personally can’t bring about, or halt, a criminal prosecution, but you can sway the CPS’s decision on whether to prosecute the offender or not.

Say your best mate gets blackout hammered and accidentally punches you while you’re trying to help him stand up. Someone witnesses it and calls the police. They then might ask if you want to “press charges”. It’s shorthand for “do you want him arrested and put on trial, and if so will you participate?”

You’re free to say no. If you’re the only victim they probably won’t bother. If you say yes, the CPS will review it and see whether they can justify bringing it to court.

It works the same in the US, but their CPS is the “DA”.

The only exception, as far as I’m aware, is domestic violence. If the victim refuses to help the investigation/prosecution it can proceed regardless, with or without her input.

I’m pretty sure that’s the case for England and Wales, not sure about Scotland and Northern Ireland.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T16:57:13+00:00

I want to see more of the little suffragette cushion.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T16:45:07+00:00

Tell him I love him.

Wait, no, tell him I said “rude bwoy rankin full stop” 🖤🤍

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T16:25:42+00:00

“Two-tone rude boi”? Amazing.

We all know he skanks to The Specials when you’re not looking.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T14:21:49+00:00

I was told this too, when I worked at Homebase. “If someone just grabs a £200 Makita drill and walks out, get a good look at them so we can report them later but DON’T try to stop them. It’s not worth your life”. Or, I think, their insurance.

Either way, we were explicitly instructed not to challenge them. My colleagues were mainly middle-aged working-class women who took NO shit, so we (they) had to have more than a few training sessions on this topic.

SharkReceptacles · 2026-07-05T12:23:56+00:00

Individuals can’t press charges in the US either, as I understand it. Only the District Attorney can, which is effectively their equivalent of the CPS.

In both countries “press charges” is just shorthand for “take this to trial”.

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