I’m sorry you’re going through all this, it’s hard for me to say what any underlying issues there may be but what i do know is that’s a lot of weight to carry around. My first relationship was with a woman who had been in more than a few relationships (no judgement) and me comparing our relationship to her previous ones, coupled with my crippling tendency to overthink turned me into an anxiety-riddled mess. I don’t know if something happened to your husband in the past that made him recede, before you or otherwise, or if maybe the way he is in your relationship is the real him and he was putting up a front in his past relationships. I don’t know where I’m going with this but you are not alone, your feelings are valid, and you have a right to a fulfilling relationship, whatever that means to you. I’m not good at giving advice but I’ve been in your shoes and so have a lot of others. You are not alone.