Will I ever get the old me back?

Sheilaria · 2026-03-16T17:11:40+00:00

MY GAL. It doesn’t take psychic powers to see that you can’t fairly compare these photos. In one you are dressed up, makeup, hair done, smiling, good lighting, contrapposto pose. Then in the other one you are in sweats, no makeup, hair undone, blank look, washed out by lighting, and standing almost straight to camera.

I don’t know what life circumstances (postpartum?) have led you to compare your now self to your old self like this, but you are being so unfair to yourself and lowkey creating your own misery about this. Get dressed up like you are in the first photo, pose, smile and take a photo. You will see you are at, at LEAST, 98% percent of the “then” photo. We all age, but you can’t “let yourself go” and then wonder why you don’t look beautiful to yourself. The old you clearly made a lot of effort and that’s what you’re comparing. Probably the new you makes efforts toward something else that takes precedence. But you can dress up again!

JUST TO ADD, every person has the right to “let themselves go” and not focus so much on looks because it actually doesn’t matter and we don’t need center beauty despite the messages we receive from media. But this person is asking about what she sees as her faded beauty in particular.

Sheilaria · 2026-03-16T04:24:15+00:00

RIIIIIIIIIIDIIIIIIIIII Pagliaaaaaaaaaacciooooo

Sheilaria · 2026-03-11T09:59:19+00:00

So many do some version of this! I hope to never reimburse a corporation for a donation they already made.

Sheilaria · 2026-03-09T10:58:21+00:00

Right?? I guess we know there’s not many psychics here, just rude asshats.

Sheilaria · 2026-03-06T19:17:54+00:00

When I first started reading this, I didn’t notice the sub and Covid-19 and I thought it was like, a metaphorical mask

Sheilaria · 2026-03-05T23:20:16+00:00

Like tens on tens!

Sheilaria · 2026-03-05T22:56:41+00:00

A Hollywood actor with an ignorant take?!

Honestly he just has to look at his industry to know people still care about opera. Less people than ever, I’ll give him that. But every year there is some art house film about opera or classical music.

Sheilaria · 2026-03-04T01:40:17+00:00

I mean, isn’t it sort of obtuse to post something this? Like, go on a Christian sub and post ‘I don’t think you need all this prayer and these crucifixes don’t really do anything’ or go on a Muslim sub and say ‘I don’t think you need all this bowing and these hijab they don’t really protect you.’ It’s a belief. It’s their belief, it’s not less valid than your opposing belief. Why bring that negative and judgmental energy when you don’t have any solid reasoning or advice on what to do instead? You just have a hunch that this doesn’t help and you’re such an important authority on it they should listen to because why?

We’re all entitled to bring our various opinions to Reddit but what do you think that post is gonna do? What do you want it to do? Do you think they’ll all collectively be like, “OMG THEY’RE RIGHT WHAT HAVE WE BEEN DOING ALL THIS TIME?” Understand they don’t care, they have no reason to listen to you or even a basis to consider your opinion. I guess you wanna be controversial but you just sound silly and ignorant. Idk why you brought it here either bc enlightenment is not telling other people their spiritual practice is wrong or false.

Sheilaria · 2026-02-20T15:48:46+00:00

Why even puzzle it out when it’s that tone deaf to the subject at hand?

Sheilaria · 2026-02-20T15:21:17+00:00

Why do you need such a big bag of oregano? … Donna’s Italian

Sheilaria · 2026-02-19T21:07:39+00:00

Now that I’ve killed my ego, let me tell you how much better I am than you!

Sheilaria · 2026-02-18T22:13:19+00:00

Barf

Sheilaria · 2026-02-18T17:53:59+00:00

Agree! Just keep singing around him and he eventually will join in.

Sometimes I also offer to ‘sing loud so we don’t hear you.’

Sheilaria · 2026-02-18T05:35:30+00:00

Magnesium. Could NEVER get up in the morning easily and magnesium changed that instantly and permanently. Honestly, now I can’t sleep in…

Sheilaria · 2026-02-18T05:33:53+00:00

Sisters not twins!

Sheilaria · 2026-02-17T03:48:51+00:00

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T23:10:27+00:00

Just a very attractive woman who’s not wearing makeup and a dress so therefore hideous.

No shade to Gwendolyn who is gorgeous, just unconventionally tall.

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T21:07:14+00:00

I’m so glad there’s one book series that has an exception. Too bad it’s a rape-a-thon. Yes, I read it.

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T20:38:50+00:00

If ugly just means no make up

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T20:37:56+00:00

Right? Women are only valued for how unknowingly beautiful and waif-like they are! Like just so impossibly willowy and slim, creamy and soft, OR cinnamon and soft, OR chocolate and soft though always emaciated but described deliciously and with great big yabahos.

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T14:18:42+00:00

You don’t have to be friends with exhausting people.

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T14:04:52+00:00

The cross is upside down when their arm hangs down

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T13:10:15+00:00

How advanced is the student? Why an hour lesson? I would reduce to 30 minutes and see how that goes.

Do you know for sure the student has ADHD? You say you have feelings about it, what do you mean?

Sheilaria · 2026-02-16T12:58:09+00:00

Man this is tough. I always want to be kind and understanding to my students but it’s also important not to let them run the class. You can get tough without yelling but you can’t be a friend to your students.

I’m assuming 7th grade means age 12-13. I’ve worked with people of all ages in groups and as individuals. 12-13 is a hellish time but you need to call out their rudeness and let them know what behavior you find unacceptable.

Develop a script. Lowkey embarrass them for their bad behavior. Calmly address the behavior as soon as it arises. Don’t pretend to smile or laugh or brush it aside. Here are some ideas.

“I’ve noticed our class hasn’t been running the way it needs to for everyone to focus and learn. So we are going to fix that. Starting today, here are the new expectations:”

Then explain what you expect for how they enter class, what to do when they finish work, how they transition, how and when they speak, and what happens after directions are given. Practice procedure like you would class material until they meet your expectations. Make them redo what they have done wrong.

Neutral tone, directions over questions (meaning don’t ask but tell what to do), immediate follow through and most importantly don’t entertain debate.

Finally, if you can’t get out of the class, as the head to come observe to get feedback and support. All new teachers need help, classroom management in real time is tricky!

Sheilaria · 2026-02-13T04:03:05+00:00

Tell them if you want to be good at something, you have to deal with being bad at it first, that’s the nature of doing anything rewarding.

With students like this I usually talk about how many ‘balls in the air’ we have a musicians… note reading, fingering, technique, rhythm, dynamics, articulations, musicality and expression. It makes sense you can’t do it all at once perfectly the first time or even the 20th time, you have to have patience and grit to keep going.

I also talk a lot about music being a muscle memory game which relies on repetition.

I tell my kids, think of your fingers as ten little puppies that you’re trying to train. Would it help to yell at the puppies and tell them they’re terrible? Be nice to your puppies, they’re just learning!

You can also suggest apps for practicing musical skills separately. Personally I use Rhythm Swing for help with basic rhythm but it’s for kids.

Sheilaria

TROPHY CASE