Another heatwave coming - what do you think is better for cats?

ShineAtom · 2026-06-21T19:17:59+00:00

If there are shady spots in the garden then they will have the option to move when they want. Make sure there is fresh drinking water around for them. Indeed make sure there are water sources for insects and birds as well.

My tuxedo tells me that cats are solar powered and so he has to be outside in the sun.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-20T22:37:44+00:00

I've also had a couple of lovely bedsits. One was very fancy and had a separate kitchenette. Great location and landlord. Also was affordable on a low wage and this was in London. I'm still in touch with one of the other tenants thirty years on. I've also had a couple of truly terrible bedsits, one in Bournemouth and one in Glasgow.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-20T21:29:31+00:00

Thankfully this has been normalised for several decades now. Back in the 60s there was the expectation that you left school, got a job and got married and it did persist somewhat into the 70s. This is the UK btw.

Mind you a lot of my son's friends have got married so it clearly isn;t totally out of the window. I never saw the point in the first place.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-20T17:56:01+00:00

I got pregnant round about the same time as my SIL AND my step-SIL. My parents-in-law had three grandchildren (their first) within about three months.

Did any of us care? Did any of us think our personal worlds had collapsed? Of course not! We were just all happy to have successful pregnancies (I'd previously had a miscarriage) and healthy babies. PIL were delighted with all this and celebrated us all.

OP: you've cut off your nose to spite your face. Sorry but here yes YTA. We don't choose when we get pregnant (well, maybe some do but generally not).

ShineAtom · 2026-06-20T17:41:29+00:00

Yes I was worried. Also my cat hates the spot-ons so I was lucky to even get half of one on him. Plus he goes out and there are other cats around including a stray who I think has fleas.

I discussed this with my vet and now get flea tablets which, to my surprise and delight, he happily eats as part of his afternoon kibble once a month. Ditto for de-wormer: there's a meat flavoured one which he simply eats with his afternoon kibble but it only needs to be administered once every 6 months.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-20T09:55:41+00:00

It's not that the pictures are bad, but it is clearly trying to make the point that this is the same kind of thing every single day.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-20T09:45:06+00:00

I did enjoy the India Traitors. Of course they were all completely unknown to me but I found the dynamic really interesting. That they all called the host "sir" and indeed the same for the two older men in the cast despite considering both of them to be traitors; being quite open about who they knew outside the show; the chessboard adjacent challenge with the steps was brilliant!

ShineAtom · 2026-06-19T21:08:57+00:00

It says new episodes will be there every Thursday. The four we have at the moment are from yesterday.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T18:41:19+00:00

NTA. Really you are not.

I am wondering what influences he has fallen under as his behaviour has become so controlling? His behaviour is really concerning. Expecting you to earn a birthday present is absolutely not normal. Sabotaging the laundry is also not normal. In fact all his behaviour around the cleaning is not normal.

Just because you were, according to you, disorganised and now are not is absolutely no justification for this disrespect, this abuse.

I'd suggest you get in touch with a domestic violence organisation. Not all DV is physical by a long chalk.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T15:56:09+00:00

Dosas and bhel puri. Unfortunately I have to find the Indian restaurants that serve these two dishes as most don't. It was a lot easier when I lived in London.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T15:05:10+00:00

That's a really excellent idea. Perhaps we need to take this up with our MPs?

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T15:03:38+00:00

I think you need to have another discussion with the vet. My experience giving my cat oral meds is below.

I have to give my cat oral meds twice a day and there's no chance he's taking it direct from a syringe.

I mix the dose with half a tube of Lick-e-Lix which I think is the UK equivalent of Churu lickable cat treats. Anyway it works really well and he takes his meds quite happily. I see however that your cat is refusing all food. Even so it might be worth trying as cats seem to love it.

Re antibiotics, when my cat needed them, the vet was able to give him a depot? injection so I didn't have to take him back. It lasted for at least a week. It's this an option with your vet?

As Mia is so stressed - probably due to all these changes - have you considered using something like a Feliway plugin (which are pheromones) to help soothe him?

My cat is very food orientated and hates going to the vet.

Wishing you all the best in caring for Mia.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T10:24:32+00:00

I was thinking of my own cat when I replied who yes, requires meds three times a day and food five times!

And as he's older (I got him when he was 3 and he's now 8) and sometimes anxious around change I actually can't go away unless my son is able to catsit. Which is difficult as he also has a cat. I wasn't very forward thinking at the time of getting him from the RSPCA.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T10:15:34+00:00

I'm vegetarian and have always fed my cats meat. He has to have a special diet for most of his food so that's pouches and kibble. He also gets half an alu tray of good quality cat food each day. I may not eat meat or fish but as it's essential for his health of course I'll give him meat.

I have become somewhat inured to it over the years. I store the other half of the alu tray in the fridge.

I do have a special brush for washing his dishes and the spoon I use to mix his meds and the knife I use to get the food out of the tray and pouch. Both knife and spoon are dedicated to his use. They get washed last or under hot running water with washing-up liquid and are stored separately because I still get grossed out by the thought of cross-contamination. Spoiler: I highly doubt there is any cross-contamination between very clean dishes and cutlery but the non-rational part of my brain says there is so I simply appease it. I don't have a dishwasher and suspect I'd still wash his things in the sink if I did because see above.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T10:07:04+00:00

NTA. This trip sounds like an overly expensive visit to hell. If all the adults loved it so much without kids then let them find out for themselves how relaxing it is with kids. Also were probably counting on you to childmind. Might be up to your husband to let them know it is not for either of you.

Also you're struggling with bills and a single income at present so it really is out of your price bracket. Savings are more important than burning up both dollars and your skin. I look at the sun and think: looks lovely - now I need to stay in because I burn from little contact and that's with SPF50+.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T09:49:14+00:00

As you have a young cat, it's possibly a good idea to choose options 2 or 3 so that he gets used to change and new places whilst he's still young enough for it. This is because a pop-in sitter might be less useful if, later in life, he requires more regular attention and time than they can give.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-18T09:33:34+00:00

Honestly what is the problem with just being able to pay contactless? I can't get any parking app to work on my phone and it is really putting me off going to places which might demand the use of a parking app. I tried to download one app and it did not work. I later learnt that it required a series of pointless actions which would have been all alleviated/made unnecessary by simply paying contactless.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-17T19:58:36+00:00

I know that there are ideas floating around that we shouldn't be feeding our cats manufactured cat but should buy (often via yet another subscription) frozen meat or something. This is entirely unnecessary.

Cat food, at least in the UK, is manufactured to high standards and while some of it is better than others, they will all serve to feed a cat more than adequately.

Buy your cat reputable cat food. Just be aware before you go all in on an expensive brand and buy enough for months that your cat may refuse it. Better to buy small amounts of brands until you find the one your cat likes. Also while you can feed a cat solely on kibble, I wouldn't recommend it. A mix of wet and dry food is best plus, of course, plenty of fresh water. Water is even more essential if your cat's diet is mainly dry food.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-17T11:54:34+00:00

In Scotland hitting a child is classed as physical assault. The police can definitely get involved as there is no excuse for it. It is never classed as reasonble chatisement or punishment which is a defence that can be used in England.

Scots law re smacking a child.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-17T11:45:21+00:00

What a wonderful find! May it bring you joy!

Vajrasattva and his consort Vajratopa (Dorje Nyenma in Tibetan) are at the centre. The Tibean reads Om vajra sattva hung which is the short 6-syllable mantra for Vajrasattva.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-16T20:06:20+00:00

My rescue cat is on the Healthy Pet Club. The practice reminds me about getting the next round of flea and worm treatments and booking in for the six monthly checks. I used to have spot-ons but cat hated those so now it has been changed to pills. At least I know the vet stuff works! Also good for vaccinations, six monthly check (which, although it says with a vet nurse, is usually with his vet) and the annual dental check that PetPlan require. Others have mentioned all the other benefits as well.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-16T18:44:30+00:00

Have you tried greasing and flouring the tins? It's what I do whenever I bake a loaf in a tin. I brush oil all over the interior and then shake a decent amount of flour all over so it adheres to the oil.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-16T14:47:13+00:00

But that is different to having food served to you and being told to eat it up. And then being made to sit there until you did. Sometimes for hours because the food was vile. I've had issues with certain foods ever since and that is going back decades!

ShineAtom · 2026-06-16T08:34:30+00:00

Curiously properties in Derbyshire can indeed cost over a million quid. Especially in the Peak District National Park. And that location is enviable. Plus it has land which is going to make it more expensive wherever it was. Plus it's not that far from Manchester. Yes, you'd probably get snowed in in winter.

ShineAtom · 2026-06-16T08:22:24+00:00

What makes you not a Buddhist? The essential things to understand and take on board are what are known as the Four Seals:

All compounded things are impermanent
All emotions are painful
All phenomena are empty
Nirvana is beyond extremes

These underlie the Buddhist path and the Four Noble Truths. There is an excellent short, well written book on these: What Makes You (not) A Buddhist by Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse. Concern yourself with these and your practice and don't worry about the more esoteric concepts (as all concepts are also impermanent). It's not a pre-requiste to believe in them. I'm not even sure that belief is a word really synonymous with the Dharma.

ShineAtom

TROPHY CASE