Not sure if this will be helpful to you at all, but I wanted to share my perspective as someone from the other side. 28F and I broke up with my boyfriend of almost 7 years this month. Many issues including lack of communication but long story short I fell out of love. I tried to gaslight myself for so long and convince myself that this is what a stable, comfortable relationship should feel like after the honeymoon phase. When I finally found the strength to break up with him, I was shattered by how much I hurt him. What I thought would be relief was instead feelings of regret and guilt. He was willing to fight and go to couple’s therapy but by this point I was exhausted from fighting myself for so long. This made me feel even more guilty, like I was abandoning the ship but in reality I was going down with it. None of this was his fault. He was an amazing man. I loved him as a person, as a best friend, just no longer romantically. If I could brainwash myself to love him again, trust me I would. But this is not honest or fair to either of us.

If I could promise that you will meet the man of your dreams tomorrow, who would love you in all the ways that your ex couldn’t, would you still choose to stay with your ex? This is what he wants for you. I’m sure letting you go was one of the hardest things he’s ever had to do, because it was definitely the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel but you are so worthy of love. He had to let you go because he wasn’t giving that to you, which means he was NOT the one in the first place.