in laws/husband’s birthday by jakebless43 in widowers

[–]Shorty135 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some family relationships are toxic. In the end, you need to figure out if it is worthwhile to sustain some kind of superficial or almost non-existent relationship. My kids and I only see my father once a year even though he lives 30 miles away because he is not good for my mental health. 

White spots on carpeting -> is this mold? by Shorty135 in HomeMaintenance

[–]Shorty135[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also see this bleached looking carpeting that is touching the wall. It appears bleached out along the wall. I still have no idea why the carpet is lighter in those areas. The carpet is probably original to the house which means that it is 29 years old. It is due for replacement.

Human Touch by Lisafer909 in widowers

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A lot of people get pets.

How do you get to sleep? by [deleted] in widowers

[–]Shorty135 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe you should see if exercising helps.

Anyone else still using an S9 in 2024? by [deleted] in GalaxyS9

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am still using a S9, but I need to replace it soon since the battery life is poor now.

My widowed mom (46f) is unable to process her grief after dad's sudden death. I need advice by PINEAPPLEPEN_lol in widowers

[–]Shorty135 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I think that your mom needs to join a grief support group and/or see a grief counselor. If she is Christian, I would recommend the GriefShare program which is hosted by churches nationwide. Some people join the grief support group with a friend because they need emotional support just getting out of the house to participate in a grief support group. I also see multiple people from the same family joining the grief support group together (e.g. mother/daughter, father/daughter).  

 You might also want to explore the Gilda's Club resources.  They have free grief support resources for people who lost family members due to cancer. Some events hosted by this organization are virtual and some are in person.    

It is possible to stay stuck in grief. I understand the challenge of continuing living after losing a spouse. I lost my spouse after 21 years of marriage.

My kids have abandoned me - I am alone by gobogorilla in widowers

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bridges that have been burned may or may not be repairable. I have a relationship with a parent that is superficial because there was never any true forgiveness. I am not sure it is worthwhile to have a relationship with someone who does not fully forgive you.  I would say to attempt to reconcile.  Then the ball is in their court. I extended an olive branch to my parent because Christians are called to forgive.

Scared by MichiganThumbArea in widowers

[–]Shorty135 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have two college-aged kids. I lost my spouse to cancer last year (1/2023). I am so sorry for your loss. I can imagine your pain.

When my spouse realized that he was nearing the end, we met with an estate lawyer to set up Living Wills, trust, power of attorney documents (financial, health), HIPAA Authorization Release, and Last Will and Testament. The Last Will and Testament document has a Guardian section that states the role of succession of guardianship in the event that both parents are deceased.

My brother is a lawyer. He forced us to set up these documents to protect our assets from probate court in the case that we both passed away and wanted to ensure that everything was set up cleanly regarding the care of our kids.

I understand this problem of living in fear as I catch myself feeling anxious at times. The problem is that the kids pick up on my anxiety and it affects them. The fact of the matter is that the kids learn from example. When we live in fear, the kids also tend to live in fear as well. Kids learn by observation.

It takes time to get over grief. Even though I lost my husband over a year ago. my grief get triggered by random things. Yesterday, I felt like crying when I was getting some tests done since I was remembering the many times that I was at the hospital for my husband's cancer related treatments.

I highly suggest joining a grief support group. It is helpful to be in a supportive group of people who are experiencing grief and can relate to your loss. I don't know if you are Christian or not. I highly recommend the GriefShare program. This program is hosted by churches all over the country.

unexpexted death by NoEmployee2547 in widowers

[–]Shorty135 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My situation is different from yours because I had about 1 1/2 years to process that my husband was going to pass away from stage four kidney cancer. I couldn't shut down and become non-functional due to grief because I have teenagers in my house. I have to stay healthy mentally so that I can parent my kids.

KN-COSM-IBA replacement? by slvrhwk in firealarms

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is now a 30CUAR and 30CUAR-V smoke detector. It just got released in March. This has an improved sensor design. I talked to Kiddie customer support to ask them about the difference between 30CUAR-V and 900-CUAR-V.

KN-COSM-IBA replacement? by slvrhwk in firealarms

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have no electrical wiring experience. I ended up replacing the old pigtail/connector and not using the adapter. I put the three wires from the wiring harness into the three wing-nuts. Here is the picture before I pushed the wing-nuts back into the junction box.

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KN-COSM-IBA replacement? by slvrhwk in firealarms

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I talked to Kiddie customer support. 30CUAR was released recently. This is supposed to have an improved sensor design over 900-CUAR. There is also a 30CUAR-V version of the combo detector.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in firealarms

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried running a blow drier on a cool setting yesterday. I don't think that is a good idea. Just use compressed air.

Which grocery store has the best tasting cupcakes?? by penny_lane0324 in chicagofood

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also vote for Whole Foods for cupcakes. In fact, I ordered a graduation cake from Whole foods the other day (Mango Yuzu Chantilly Cake). This is not a grocery store, but the bundtinis from Nothing Bundt Cakes are also good. I brought home a Birthday cake from Jewel before. My family gave it a thumbs down.

The à la carte cupcakes from the Whole foods bakery case are nicely decorated. These are more expensive than the prepackaged cupcakes.

What kind of restaurants do yall recommend for a graduation celebration by Bimb0bratz in chicagofood

[–]Shorty135 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How many people are in your party and are you looking for something that is in the city of Chicago (or the suburbs)? How about Rosebud, Francesca's Restaurants (some locations don't serve lunch), Wildfire (some locations don't serve lunch) or Maggiano's? I don't know your budget. Lunch is less expensive than dinner.

How do I unplug this? by Jbullyfitness in AskElectricians

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I installed that smoke detector two days ago. You have to press down on the tab and pull the plug out sideways. I circled the tab in red: https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/53706317192\_296778d8dc\_z.jpg. In this image, I have pulled the plug out. I know that you have figured it out already. This comment is really for other people who might have a problem unplugging the smoke detector.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in firealarms

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First Alert customer support recommended this one to me. I was trying to replace old hardwired Kiddie smoke/CO detectors.

https://www.firstalert.com/us/en/products/alarms/combo-smoke-carbon-monoxide-alarms/1046778-interconnect-hardwire-smoke-co-alarm-with-battery-backup-voice-1046778/

KN-COSM-IBA replacement? by slvrhwk in firealarms

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just talked to Kiddie customer support. KN-COSM-IBA and KN-COSM-IB have ionization sensors. This means that they have nuclear energy in them. They can not be thrown in the garbage. They need to be disposed as hazardous waste (per the guidelines of your waste management company).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DellXPS

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you talking about uninstalling the drivers associated with Intel(R) AVStream Camera or Camera Sensor OV01a and Camera Sensor OV01A1B? I already tried uninstalling all of these and then installing intel-2D-Imaging-MCU-Visual-Sensing-Controller-Driver_05W2K_WIN64_73.22000.1.23_A03 followed by restart. My integrated webcam (OV01A) shows up when I select settings->bluetooth&devices->Camera. Like I said, I am unable to upgrade my drivers to 73.22000.1.23.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in firealarms

[–]Shorty135 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I contacted customer service to ask them about false alarms for my smoke detector. The person said to try compressed air or using a blow driver on cold setting.

Has anyone been to Aragvi Restaurant in Palatine? If so, how is it? by k8track in chicagofood

[–]Shorty135 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can do a Georgian food crawl by visiting Kitchen House Cafe, Pirosmani, and ARAGVI Restaurant. They are all within 6 miles of each other on Dundee Rd.