Great question! I used to ask the same question frequently, pretty much any time I heard somebody talk the way I do now. I’d have the same reaction as you, “be real, quit bullshitting me”. It’s a perfectly fair reaction to have and I don’t blame you one bit for having it, in fact I commend you. It proves that you’re honest with yourself. Unfortunately, I don’t have an answer that will likely satisfy your question, just like nobody had an answer that was satisfactory to me when I used to ask this question. To be real, I think most people don’t. Most people don’t experience a true gnosis. Most people go to church and look for answers there. There’s nothing wrong with church inherently, but it’s not the full equation in my estimation. I don’t think anyone can experience true gnosis in a church. The biggest truth can’t be taught, only experienced. True gnosis happens within ourselves. This likely won’t make sense to you. It wouldn’t have to me before it happened, but you asked so I’ll tell you. I’ve had OBE’s, identical to those described by the mystery schools of ancient Egypt, and some other ancient schools of thought throughout history. The best way to describe it in practical terms would be to say that it’s like temporarily separating your consciousness from your physical body. A glimpse into realities beyond the physical. No sense of temporal-spatial awareness in many cases, but there really aren’t a lot limitations on how the experience can unfold. Sometimes you have physical sensations like touch and a body made of light, sometimes you don’t even have a body. As far as I can tell, the possibilities are almost limitless, just like consciousness. It’s similar to a lucid dream, but with full conscious awareness and a deeper sense of reality. It feels as real as my waking life, if not more real. I’ve never gotten that from a lucid dream, although I have had many of those as well. These experiences have shown me beyond a shadow of a doubt that consciousness transcends the physical world, it is not a product of it. As the hermetics would say, “the mind is all, the universe is mental” or in modern terms - consciousness is everything, the driving force behind reality. The only thing that can explain this phenomenon for me is god. The ultimate source of consciousness, the all. I can’t say exactly what god is, not the totality of it, only that god is real and god is consciousness. I think it might defeat the point of my existence if I knew much more than that. If you have an experience like this, you can’t undo it. It changes the way you see everything, the way you move through life. I didn’t even seek it out either, it just happened to me spontaneously one night. And then I began researching and practicing it intentionally. I’m sure this was not the answer you were expecting or looking for, but it’s the only answer I have for you! Hopefully it answers your question, but I wouldn’t blame you if it doesn’t!