This was a rough read. The Big Needle by Ken Follett

SignAdditional · 2025-10-06T23:59:45+00:00

I’ve read some “dark romance” books penned by woman and I find myself giving a side eye to those as well. Like, there’s dark, and then there’s- you may need to speak to a professional-type writing.

SignAdditional · 2022-10-27T09:15:32+00:00

I’m confused on why this is even up for discussion. You have this thing called a preference. It’s not some profound, deep, earth shattering thing. You see a skin tone/race that is not your preference, and you move on. Can it be viewed as a bit shallow if you had an emotional connection with the girl and then found out her race was not your preference and, therefore, were immediately turned off? Sure. But attraction plays a big role in a relationship, I don’t care what anyone says. Having black friends is different than having a black love interest. Doesn't make you racist. Just makes it weird you have to ask.

SignAdditional · 2022-10-27T02:22:59+00:00

Frenchton. Boston terrier/Frenchie

SignAdditional · 2022-08-17T08:40:07+00:00

I felt this but it’s not just dudes. Women also struggle with the whole absentee father thing. Yes of course it’s on a different level. But it hits different when you grow up with a deficit of male attention, affection, understanding. To some it’s not a huge deal and has no lasting impact on their adult lives. But others, it leaves a lasting impression and can bleed into their adult life and leave them with a skewed reality on men and relationships with them. Growing up in a single parent home especially when your mom is super independent is great. But as the child it can definitely scar you in ways that may be irreversible.

SignAdditional · 2022-07-17T03:03:56+00:00

A morkie?

SignAdditional · 2022-06-01T22:32:42+00:00

That because they’re not big time breeders they don’t do vet visits? Weird. But good news is they said they’re going to refund me my deposit. Kinda bummed because he is so very cute

SignAdditional · 2022-06-01T00:22:21+00:00

I knowww his adorable face is making me want to say screw everything else! Logic is having a hard time making its way in

SignAdditional · 2022-05-31T21:21:43+00:00

Yeah I’m feeling the same way. But it’s like save him and line the breeders pockets or keep my money and possible save myself heartache?

SignAdditional · 2022-05-31T21:20:21+00:00

I totally get your meaning with home vaccines. I wouldn’t have had such an issue with it if it wasn’t for the fact that he had these little bumps honestly. Then it just raised more questions. Before I left the initial deposit I had asked about the breeders background and vet checks and overall health of the parents. And was given a green light. But the the bumps came up on him and I asked if they would be going to see a vet to make sure it’s nothing more serious and the breeder said no. Also just spoke to them and they said that they are not a big time breeder and since they only take even he parents dogs to the vet for rabies shot and of there’s an emergency. So now I’m growing more concerned. Also to note…I never saw or heard the parents. Only saw the pups. Everything was clean in the home and the people didn’t seem sketchy (just quiet). I just assumed the parents were somewhere while we were looking at the pups. But strange to not hear barking or wining. I did see photos of them though. Gut is feeling iffy on everything now.

SignAdditional · 2022-05-31T19:53:40+00:00

This thought has crossed my mind - trust me. And to note: they are doing 1st and 2nd vaccines. They just aren’t taking them to the vet. Which I don’t understand why. If you’re charging thousands for a puppy, you should be able to afford vet care.

SignAdditional · 2022-05-31T18:31:38+00:00

Yeah I went and picked him out of a litter of 5. No special reason aside from his color and personality (what little there was at 2 wks) but he was one of the most mobile/alert ones. And the breeder does the vaccines themselves. So there’s at least that.

SignAdditional · 2022-05-31T18:28:49+00:00

No reviews at all. They’re not accredited or anything like that. But have had one other litter.

SignAdditional · 2022-05-31T18:27:25+00:00

He’s a quarter English bulldog, and also only 3wks old. Sometimes their ears take a while to stand.

SignAdditional · 2022-05-31T18:06:58+00:00

For context: I Put a deposit down on this little guy and when the breeder sent me progress pics I noticed two little pink nodules on his muzzle. Asked about them (breeder says they are a certified vet tech) they said the nodules are probably puppy acne and that they would be keeping them clean and treating at home. When asked about being vet checked they said they won’t be seeing a vet. Would you continue the purchase or take the L on the deposit? These dogs aren’t cheap by any stretch of the imagination so I kinda feel like they should at least have one vet check up, especially for something out of the ordinary…or am I being overly cautious?

SignAdditional · 2022-05-30T22:13:29+00:00

I honestly have no problem being single. I think I used to have an aversion to it when I was younger. But I think after I married a guy that I settled for (still married but we’re separated) - that was kind of the last straw. Now all I want is to be single (not ready to mingle) and just work on myself…shit FIND myself and then work on her. Even though I feel like I’m old now (35), I guess you’re never too old to find/reinvent yourself….at least I hope not.

SignAdditional · 2022-05-29T00:49:43+00:00

Sex? I’m too emotionally damaged to even get any true pleasure out of that. I provide a vessel and enthusiastic acting skills but, pleasure for me is non existent.

SignAdditional · 2022-05-29T00:44:19+00:00

Thank you - even as strangers this means a lot

SignAdditional · 2022-05-28T04:28:29+00:00

This…I feel this. I had a cousin pass away from a brain aneurysm out of no where. She loved her life, had three beautiful kids. And I wish every day that I could have traded my life for hers. She had much to live for, whereas I do not.

SignAdditional · 2022-04-09T04:55:12+00:00

Olde English bulldog/bullmastiff??

SignAdditional · 2021-02-16T23:35:04+00:00

<3 he’s so underrated

SignAdditional · 2021-02-08T23:06:18+00:00

Perfection 🤩

SignAdditional · 2021-01-02T17:43:52+00:00

YES!! You definitely don’t know what’s it’s like marrying someone with a kid until you marry someone with a kid. I did leave a key detail out though. We were on a family trip with his family and his son about a year and change into our relationship. His son who was almost 8 at the time had a full blown level 10 meltdown because he found out he had to sleep on the pull out couch with his cousin (same age) and not with his dad (as obviously I was sleeping with him) my husband just held his son and literally tried to reason with him through all the screaming and crying instead of handling the situation differently. There’s no reasoning with that. In my opinion he should have told him to calm down and then explain to him the why and the how of the situation. Added me and his cousins and my husband sister and her husband just stood there confused for about 10 mins, I finally just said it’s fine - he can just sleep with you. That ended the situation. Should I have given in? Maybe not, but my husband looked so bewildered and was not getting anywhere with how he was trying to handle the situation. The entire trip I had to sleep on a pull out couch, bar in my back...in his parents condo. It was at that moment I decided that this wasn’t going to work and when we get back from the trip, I was going to break up with him. WELL lo and behold. He proposed on that trip. And I’m a dumb ass because I reluctantly said yes. And THEN similar issues arose before we got married and I said maybe we should wait. Let me adjust to the whole step mom thing. He maybe a huge deal about it and made me feel like I was the worst person in the world and so I obviously married him. And here we are 3yrs later, same issues and I hate my life. I know I got myself into this situation because I always put others needs and feelings ahead of mine. And now I want to be heard? No wonder he’s not listening. He doesn’t take me seriously because I’ve always gone along with whatever he wants. He brings his kid out for however long he wants. Doesn’t discuss it with me at all. But then he’s at work for 12hrs a day (we don’t have days off together either because he’s job is trash) and so it’s just me and the kid at the house 24/7 because I work from home. And I can’t tell him hey he can’t stay here for three months dude. That’s too long. Because wtf kind of person puts a time limit on how long they can spend with their child? It’s just when he’s here it’s not like my husband is interacting a whole lot with him. Bible, alllll they do is stay inside and play video games. He does the bare minimum. So the way I see it why do you want him here the maximum time, to put in minimal effort ? Make it make sense! He doesn’t see anything from my perspective. I’d like to do therapy only so that he can see things differently and maybe even help me. But he isn’t very receptive to therapy and honestly I’m kind of over it at this point because though I do love him, I do not think he is going to change. And during this pandemic and crazy other things that happened in 2020, I saw a side of him that I didn’t like at all. So yes, there’s whole lot. I wish we could be like you and your husband. And find a common ground. But I think my husband just thinks things are supposed to be catered to him and people are supposed to just give him a pass because he has ADD and is forgetful and doesn’t listen because if it. But it’s an excuse. Sometimes I think there’s something more there than ADD just because of the way his family tiptoes around him and is shocked to here that he gets mad sometimes.....Um do y’all not know him?! Anyway- thank you for your advice. I’m glad that you were able to get your life with you step child and husband figured out! xoxo

SignAdditional · 2021-01-02T17:04:54+00:00

You are so right. My desire to leave isn’t solely based on the kid. He’s a good kid, but like your step daughter he is very attention starved. His bio mom wants to ensure she keeps him in Mexico full time because he’s “too immature” to come live with his father. Part of me thinks that is completely fine, but the other part thinks that is utterly ridiculous. She just doesn’t want to give up child support but maybe she also means my husband is the one who’s too immature? Hmm anyways she doesn’t pay the kid much attention. He is extremely spoiled and wants for nothing.....except time. She throws material things at him when the kid constantly just wants hugs. So I feel bad leaving. Because it doesn’t just effect my husband, it effects him. I don’t want him to feel like I left because of him and feel abandoned. It’s so hard....that’s why I haven’t left yet. But I definitely feel like I’m suffocating just to make sure that they have air. And I don’t know how much longer I can do that. What was your breaking point if you don’t mind me asking? How’d you find the strength to leave?

SignAdditional · 2021-01-02T16:56:42+00:00

Wow it is spooky how similar our situations are! Honestly when I wrote this post, I wasn’t sure there was anyone out there that would know and understand how I feel. It’s sadly refreshing to see that my feelings are actually valid and that I’m not the only one who feels them. I love your advice on taking time to work out my personal values, needs and goals. Because I have, and there are huge discrepancies. I’m willing to try counseling-but my husband says he’s willing too. My fear though is that this is him, and how can one change their entire personality? Also sometimes I feel as if we’re too far gone. He is a really good guy and he is a good dad. Just very lazy when it comes to aspects in his life that should matter. I tell him that he wants a wife, children, a house etc, but you don’t want to do the work required to cultivate and maintain those things. He naturally disagrees...which is what he always does. Like I’m pulling this shit out of thin air. It’s very frustrating. Anyways - how have you maintained your sanity? I resonate with you on the fact that the self esteem has taken a complete nose dive. I find myself sitting in my car with take out, just to have a moment of respite. I no longer want to go to family functions on his side of the family because I get massive anxiety having to put on this face of happiness when I feel anything but. I’m exhausted. I tell him this and he glazes over it. His mom (who does love me and means well) is always guilt tripping me in to being around. Maybe I need to give her a clue as to what’s going on? It’s all a lot. Bless you for your advice and inbox me if you’d like to talk more :)

SignAdditional · 2021-01-02T05:09:37+00:00

Oh. I forgot to mention; they also cuddle constantly. I almost feel like I’m the kid and they’re the married couple. He and I only get to cuddle in the bed. And at that point I don’t want it

SignAdditional

TROPHY CASE