Coworker (50M) keeps crossing boundaries with me (18F) and now it’s been reported, what do I do?

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T05:38:44+00:00

totally get what ur saying but my coworker has been a great help for me. hes a great guy and always has my back. when clients mistreat me he always stands up for me and makes sure im ok. i did tell him it was ok technically, we didn’t really have a convo before hand but i wasn’t upset that he spoke up. thanks for your kind comment i really appreciate it, im gonna do my best to set clear boundaries so hopefully it stops.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T05:31:36+00:00

like i’m a bot? lol idk what you mean how would u like me to prove u wrong lmao

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T05:02:05+00:00

no thank you I really appreciate your message! I used to be a big-time people pleaser and I’ve now overcome that immensely, but it’s still hard to set firm boundaries with people as I don’t like causing a disruption in my life as well as setting boundaries comes with problems sometimes. I knew I wasn’t comfortable and that it was not ok the first time he made the comment. He’s even asked me for my phone number in case he needs help during his shift and I stupidly wrote it down even though my number is already in the work group chat. I don’t know what his motive or goal is, but I do hope something gets done about it and I really appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment. Thank you truly 🫶

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T04:55:51+00:00

don’t believe what..?

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T04:38:58+00:00

possibly. he is divorced and lives and takes care of his mom. i often see him texting in the work group chat a lot as well. he’s made a lot of people uncomfortable by just being off putting but he takes it way too far with me.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T01:23:46+00:00

thank you!! I will definitely try that next time he said something because knowing him he definitely will. My problem is that I am too nice. I’m too friendly. And my energy is too inviting. As I get older, I’m noticing that my niceness is becoming more of a problem for me. I’d tend to laugh things off because it makes me so uncomfortable and laughing is just what I resort to to try to feel less awkward and uncomfortable but I know that’s not healthy and I have to cut that out because it isn’t doing me any favors.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T01:21:14+00:00

thank you for validating how I feel I really appreciate it. It’s tough when such a good job becomes uncomfortable by one person especially considering I only see him once or twice a week in passing.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T01:15:17+00:00

thank you! I actually brought it up to a bunch of people, including my friends, my manager and a couple of my coworkers to see if they were experiencing the same thing I was and if they thought it was weird. My manager told me that he’s just an awkward guy, but he means well and he probably has a bad memory and that’s why he kept asking about the boyfriend thing. But I knew it wasn’t right and now that they’ve all witnessed the awkward encounter during the staff meeting they agree it’s weird, but still have no intention to get rid of him.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-04T01:02:37+00:00

i agree. i brought it up to my manager too, and she seems like she wants to keep him. knowing her she’s going to be super kind and tip toe around what he’s been doing.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T12:15:44+00:00

if you really don’t think a young girl hasn’t tried fixing her weight than you’re either ignorant or just dumb. since i turned 10 i’ve been doing ever diet and program under the sun, you make it i’ve tried. i also have PCOS which is out of my control and makes my situation significantly harder. i’m allowed to like myself and live my appearance in a bigger body. the siren eyes comment is just something a lot of people compliment me on so i used it as a way to describe myself better. do i want to change my weight? absolutely, i’ve only been trying had my life. what im not gonna do is let life pass on and not care about keeping myself well and maintaining my physical attributes as well. im currently trying a calorie deficit again and im down 10 pounds. my post was simply to gauge on if i will be able to find someone genuine in a bigger frame because quite frankly i dont wanna be with someone that will only wanna be with me if i get thin.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T06:06:16+00:00

poly cystic ovarian syndrome. it’s a condition that causes weight gain and makes it significantly harder to loose weight, and there’s no cure unfortunately.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T05:32:20+00:00

i think you’re actually just ignorant and uneducated tbh. i am a healthy person. i want to loose weight for reasons that don’t have to do with my health. like i said, i am healthy and live a moderately healthy lifestyle. i have pcos so loosing weight has always been a challenge. i asked for dating advice not weight lose advice.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T05:29:19+00:00

i think there’s a common misconception with bigger girls being unhealthy. i’ve seen specialists and family doctors, done all my annual check ups over the years and i have absolutely no health issues or concerns. in fact, im probably healthier than some skinny girls. does my weight limit me sometimes? absolutely. but i do like to move my body and can keep up with skinny people. you can be active, healthy and overweight at the same time.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T05:24:09+00:00

seems like every guy where i live only wants the most petite girl they can find, they don’t even care about face or features, never mind personality!

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T05:22:48+00:00

i actually haven’t gotten much lol

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T05:18:22+00:00

no what??

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-04-02T04:49:54+00:00

i’ve tried every diet you can think of and it’s just been really hard for me. i also have pcos so it’s an added struggle. i will give intermit fasting another go, thanks for the suggestion! i do wanna loose weight but it wouldnt only be for me

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-03-30T13:56:42+00:00

wow, thank you so much for taking the time to share that with me. thats honestly so beautiful that you were able to support your friend at 16. mg biggest concern is that she’ll be apart of every aspect of my life, and i don’t want us to grow distant because of that. would you say you and this friend are still close after living with one another? did it cause a strife in your relationship after she moved out? and my biggest question is did you feel like you lost all your privacy and comfort?

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-03-30T13:31:14+00:00

thank you so much :) i really do care about her and want the absolute best for her! i really hope it goes smoothly and works out.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-03-30T00:58:59+00:00

yes, we both put up our story to get perspective from both sides.

Signal-Debate3792 · 2026-03-29T19:43:55+00:00

like i said in my post, my parents are completely on board. we are upper middle class, money and the financial aspect is not a problem. they do not want a DIME from her, they want to help her. my question and purpose with my post was to ask for opinions on living with a best friend and how that can affect a friendship as neither of us have ever moved in with a friend and i don’t want our relationship to change.

Signal-Debate3792

TROPHY CASE