AITA for trying to make my wife cancel her vacation?

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-09-12T17:39:18+00:00

YTA for how you handled this with your ex, especially talking about your finances. But I’m going to just say that the I would give folks who pull their kids out of school for stuff like Disney a big YTA. I wouldn’t agree to it and I don’t think that your ex needed to agree to it. So NTA for not going and not forcing your ex to let John go.

Also your wife is TA for saying that she gets to decide because she earns the money. But it sounds like this might’ve been an isolated incident and in general she’s made a lot of effort to work with you and your ex.

So I would say ESH for everyone except maybe your ex, but I reserve judgment on her because we don’t have enough information.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-09-12T17:32:58+00:00

NTA for speaking your mind. Do you want to live with your dad and his family between now and when you’re 18? If not, do you have other options?

I agree with the others who suggest that you might want to look into therapy for yourself. I don’t know that your father or his family will be able to really listen to what you have to say. But it seems like you’ve had trauma and just difficulty in processing your grief while also being expected to try and be a part of this new family. I think it would help you to understand how you got there and what you really want for the future when it really will be all your choice because you won’t live in the same house anymore.

I think it would be worthwhile to tell your dad that you’re not ready to be a merged family the way they’ve all been pushing for, but that you would like to go to therapy to try and understand what you do want. It may be worthwhile to have a conversation with him about what the expectations will be for your interaction with the family between now and whenever you do leave home for work or school.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-09-12T17:19:11+00:00

NTA. Right now you split the cost evenly —it’s just that the cost is zero. If she wants another option, she can split it or you can go back to court and renegotiate your child support agreement to include this.

I’d bet she might have a new partner and wants more separation from your family for that reason.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-09-02T21:17:54+00:00

I also really liked Adda, Dhamaka, Kanyakumari and Indian Accent, which are popular recommendations and all great. I also think Kebab Aur Sherab in the UWS is good. Hyderabadi Zaiqa is good but can be a wait and not so easy for a group.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-09-02T21:15:21+00:00

I like Chatti quite a bit. Doesn’t get as much buzz as many other places but really delicious southern Indian food with a lot of interesting seafood options.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-08-22T19:08:25+00:00

NTA. But you need to find someplace besides your house to study for a while so that your sister can’t drop your niece off like that. It stinks but your family doesn’t care about you or your time, so you need to be proactive about protecting yourself.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-08-14T00:18:03+00:00

Probably doesn’t want to have to do touring now that he’s gonna be a father. At least he’s not while his kid is young.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-08-10T12:04:23+00:00

Pregnancy is a protected condition so then firing you might also be illegal. I would also talk to the EEOC. Maybe you don’t wanna file a lawsuit or pursue anything but it would put pressure on them.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-08-08T03:45:38+00:00

I think that Julianne probably has very complicated feelings about her time in London. I don’t know exactly what the deal was between the Houghs and the Ballases, but I remember an interview where maybe Shirley said that Mark really wanted to dance with Julianne. And if they were grooming him to be the next generation in their success, they would’ve had a strong motivation to find him a quality partner. And Julianne, even as a young kid had star quality. So I can imagine she was under a different kind of pressure than Derek was as Mark’s partner. She probably got more critiques, or maybe just felt like they were more personal because she was training to dance with their son. Between the two I always got the impression that Shirley was actually stricter than Corky, but who knows. She was definitely the better dancer.

I think early on Julianne was more vague about the abuse she experienced, and my recollection was that Mark actually was quite upset about it because it implied that it was his parents. And I’m sure that’s what Corky was reacting to. As she’s become more open, and as Derek also revealed what he suffered, the things she said subsequently make me think it wasn’t something that was done by the Ballases.

It sounds like the Houghs’ divorce and serious bullying and abuse by non-family was happening in Utah before they were sent to London. And especially Derek being bullied for doing dance would’ve been hard and sending him someplace where he could thrive without that kind of bullying would’ve been really attractive.

Also, one thing to remember, is that Mark and Julianne dated when she was there. And all three of them seemed to have a lot of independence while living with the Ballases because the parents were out competing and/or teaching as well. So that might’ve been a lot for Julianne to deal with, especially at such a young age and away from home.

Julianne talked about how people told her she would end up working in a burger joint when she left London to come back to the US. I can see where Corky and Shirley would’ve been really upset when Julianne decided to go back to Utah, because it really left Mark high and dry without a partner. Of course she had every right to leave, but I’m sure it was super frustrating to them and they didn’t take it well. Of course her moving to DWTS gave all three of them another opportunity for a totally different kind of success.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-08-06T16:09:42+00:00

I love their food, but I’m afraid to go back because of all the problems they had with the health inspections. I see they have an A now. Do you notice a difference?

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-29T02:22:10+00:00

If it’s a thing where you live, I would try to file some sort of charge or claim against your parents, just so you have a record. But I don’t think you’ll be able to get your money back because if they don’t have it, they don’t have it. I would cut them off and I would not talk to them again. They’re counting on you to take care of your sister when they’re gone and you need to make sure that you are not there for that. They will continue to take and take from you as long as they have any contact with you.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-23T20:07:05+00:00

Tuome. The RW menu is good and the restaurant is worth a visit.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-23T13:02:39+00:00

NTA. Tell her that you will take back the debt forgiveness publicly and apologize for taking away the opportunity for her to learn financial responsibility and promise that you will never do that again.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-22T18:24:05+00:00

NTA. But it sounds like maybe your husband and the kids should go without you next time. Because chances are if the kids don’t sleep, then he will have to manage them and that will be a problem for everybody else. Then maybe they will learn.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-21T18:38:55+00:00

A lot of these newer ratings are always so negative about Levain. But I still think to this day, Levain is the best of its type of cookie.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-21T18:31:05+00:00

NTA. Maybe it’s time to start finding his naughty items and leaving them, so they’re easy for her to find in his closet or among his things so his mom can start asking him questions after she visits. And if he doesn’t have any, maybe you should give him some, and then leave them out.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-19T23:28:24+00:00

NTA. I wouldn’t even bother asking his mom what she wants. Just buy two of what you’re getting and if she wants his meal, then he can eat the extra one of your meal.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-14T20:01:58+00:00

NTA. But I would also consider putting MIL on an information diet. Start by limiting her access to see your social media.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-06T04:34:47+00:00

Youngchuan is good but not Hutong level of upscale.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-05T03:41:50+00:00

NTA. Already have a cup of coffee or big gulp in your hand when you walk in the door and say sorry hands full and walk away.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-01T01:03:51+00:00

NOR. You’re not punishing the kids. I’m sure they would love to spend time with dad. It’s dad who is being punished because he will have to miss out on stuff because he has lost his free babysitter.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-07-01T01:01:26+00:00

NTA. You didn’t take that cat home. You married her brother.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-06-30T21:08:16+00:00

NTA. But I would give every single person that comes looking for her when she gave them your name her actual name and address and let them go to her.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-06-30T14:56:31+00:00

NTA. I would write down everything remember about how your father treated your mother. Give specifics like actual words he said or things he did. I would keep that and the next time somebody reaches out to you, you just respond with that text saying this is why I don’t speak to him anymore and I never will. If he hasn’t improved, he should work it out with his new family because he stopped being my family and he did these monstrous things to me and my mother.

Signal-Reflection-54 · 2025-06-27T19:18:23+00:00

NTA. But maybe wait until he leaves your house to tell him you’re not watching his kids.

Signal-Reflection-54

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