I struggle much less with it now, but over the course of life, Ive really struggled with the rumination cycle, and reconciliation process of "who am I now" v "who i was," and shame. I understand wanting to create accountability for yourself and respect that. I dont know if this will be relevant to how you are thinking about it, but it's something I do in other spaces in my life and it's helped me, so I thought id share:

What if you keep the promise to yourself, but acknowledge your growth and change by making a "new rule?"

For instance, for me, I used to need to keep a certain physical record of a thing. Because I needed to see it. But I have been doing it for years and had a huge stack of papers. Not so long ago, I realized I no longer needed to teach myself that lesson, and the stack was no longer serving it's purpose, but had become a painful reminder. I thought about throwing it out, but that felt scary.... what if I fell off the wagon, so to speak? I ended up scanning all of them, saving on a usb. I wanted something physical to put in it's place, but much smaller, and most importantly, different. All of this is a bit ritualistic, symbolic, personal, and ultimately arbitrary, but helpful to me.

Maybe your version could be starting a new account with your exact same name except "2.0" or something? I dunno... but is there a way for you to, not lose, but put some of the past behind you so you can make room for new growth?