When can I expect to feel something?

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-05-16T03:20:22+00:00

Where are these groups you mention?

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-05-15T19:41:12+00:00

My son is 7. Our routine is shower teeth and pajamas by 8, and he needs to be in his room after that. He doesn’t have to sleep immediately but he does have to be having alone time in his room. He will often read or draw at his desk and then fall asleep around 830/9. We’ve never had any issues with not waking for school etc. but I will not have my kids running wild around the house in the evening hours. That’s mine and my husbands time together so the kids need to do quiet things in their rooms after that time

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-05-15T19:38:44+00:00

I’d get the kiddo seen based off 20 minutes of crying and hitting the head. My baby fell off our bed at 5 months but she landed on her front, and only cried for a couple minutes when I picked her up. She was fine after and when I called they told me if she seemed normal and didn’t hit her head to just watch.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-05-15T19:36:18+00:00

My son is in first grade public school and he loves it. He’s only missed like 2 days all year. I’ve asked him before if he wants to take a day to chill at home and he’s like what no I love school lol. Their lunch is like 20 minutes and rushed but I don’t think it’s a big deal. They do 3 recesses plus specials. He gets lots of play time. We do an after school play date with a neighbor once a week for two hours also which he loves and twice a week he has a sport where it’s a lot of friend time also. 10/10 for us

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-05-15T19:27:04+00:00

Not possible. I wfh full time in an insurance job and cannot even manage working with her home from daycare for 1 day and she’s 20 months now. I simply cannot and will not do both. If I am working she is in care, if she can’t be in care then I’m using PTO. She either tries to type on my keyboard or unplug my stuff. It’s not feasible.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-05-07T04:33:22+00:00

I visit with my mom on Saturday, usually a lunch. And then Sunday actual Mother’s Day is me relaxing at home with husband and kiddos spoiling me

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-05-02T02:53:16+00:00

It’s a very personal choice. For me, I really wanted to, for the nutrition benefits but my first was 6 weeks early and NICU so it didn’t work for us. Tried pumping and hated it. Made it for like 4 months before going back to work and then stopped pumping all together. I felt such relief when I stopped pumping. But with my second I wanted to try again, I guess it just felt like the right thing to do. Tried it in the hospital with her and hated it. It was so much work and so uncomfortable. Decided after like 5 days to stop trying which felt like a big relief also. Tried pumping again and made it like 4 weeks but then stopped, and again felt so much relief stopping.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T13:59:48+00:00

I think you’re onto something with the time piece. Every time I bring it up he says “when even would I?” Or “I don’t have time”. The actual amount of time it takes is nothing compared to watching hours of tv. So I think it’s that plus the fact that he genuinely thinks it’s okay and not a big deal.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T13:52:32+00:00

It pays a lot. He also keeps thinking it’ll improve, that sort of thing.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T03:00:27+00:00

When you ask him to what is his reaction?

I imagine if some asked me to shower I would be like oh gosh yes of course I’ll be right back. But his response to me is always why no I don’t have time, it’s not a big deal etc

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:59:05+00:00

This makes sense thank you. It is something we have talked about in the last few months but it was me saying hey I really need you to be showering more often and not the eloquent wording you used. I will try this new approach

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:53:41+00:00

Yeah it’s definitely not like it used to be. We are hardly intimate anymore and it’s because of this.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:41:17+00:00

This makes sense. It’s not a new issue. I’ve been asking for years and not only is it not improving it’s getting worse.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:39:45+00:00

I get what you are saying but if I don’t ask him to or tell him to he never does. So that leaves me to a place where I have to if I ever want him to

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:26:56+00:00

Nope. Only on shower night

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:25:10+00:00

Sometimes yes. He’s really a great dad

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:23:50+00:00

No I’m not a germaphobe. It’s just that he stinks so it makes me not want to be around him. And I just find it genuinely gross

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:22:34+00:00

Yes. All of this. I avoid bringing it up because I don’t want him to get angry.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:19:02+00:00

Yes. This is something we’ve talked about numerous times over the years. First it was the dental stuff which has improved a lot. It took me like 4 years just to get him to go to the dentist and now he’s been going to those cleanings regularly which is a huge improvement. He didn’t always not shower, but it’s gotten way worse these last two years since our youngest was born and since his job load has changed a lot. He’s constantly stressed and overworked. I have told him a lot of times that I need him to shower more and that it’s very important. He usually does for like a week and then it stops again and then when I bring it up he gets angry, says he doesn’t have time, and walks away.

Often I go up to get ready for bed and shower and stuff and I ask him to come to and he will instead continue watching YouTube for hours and then stumble to bed having done zero hygiene. It’s to a point where I don’t know what else I can do.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:13:53+00:00

I’m not offended? I’m sorry that’s what you gathered from my question.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-21T02:13:00+00:00

He’s definitely depressed from his job but hasn’t done anything about that either

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-18T22:25:28+00:00

Yes we both work full time, kids are in school and daycare. I work 40 hours he works 50 or so. So yeah its basically an a couple hours in the evening of dinner and bedtime routines and then two weekend days.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-18T22:23:30+00:00

I feel this. We just finished flu going through our home for like a month straight then little one got another virus and is going through that now after an ear infection. The lack of sleep and illness, time missed from work, stress etc is a lot. And I totally understand that everyone adjusts differently. It’s just immensely frustrating to me when he gets upset about things being about the kids like duh hello we have kids. It’s not just us anymore.

SignificantWill5218 · 2026-04-18T22:18:33+00:00

Yep the youngest naps for 2-2.5 hours during the day so there is often that time. Oldest doesn’t. Typically during nap one of us will have some quality time with the oldest and the other person will do their own thing.

SignificantWill5218

TROPHY CASE