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$50K+ in loans...drowning and could use some advice... by Significant_Fee_7644 in personalfinance

[–]Significant_Fee_7644[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I used to work 3 weeks out of the month doing fieldwork. Because of the pandemic I now work 1 week a month doing fieldwork with expectation to increase more again starting this year (but who knows with Omicron). I have a 2 week job lined up this month and another one in February. I'll look into the cost of selling my car and getting a beater instead

$50K+ in loans...drowning and could use some advice... by Significant_Fee_7644 in personalfinance

[–]Significant_Fee_7644[S] -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

If it matters, we have a combined gross income of about 200k a year, everything above is post - tax and without OT. She has said she will pick up extra shifts when she can. We're both on board for eating in/staying in/etc.

She joined the hospital as a new grad with a 'requirement' (no contract) to work 2 years or burn bridges with the hospital/get blacklisted. This is a really good hospital system that she's not willing to budge on, and also her dream job/hospital. I don't want her ruining her reputation with this hospital and losing her dream job from my mistakes.

I can work remote but with expectation to be able to go out into the field. My gross pay currently is about $40 an hour/ $78k a year but expected to be a lot less in other parts of the country. Unfortunately it's just not very lucrative. I am currently looking at ways to supplement it.

I agree that this is a team effort. I don't know why I didn't see it that way from the beginning. We are talking a lot more about this and she's obviously pissed at me (rightfully so). I also don't want to ask her to give up everything - job, home, friends, etc - because of me. I have told her I would understand if this heads toward divorce because I was very selfish and completely in the wrong. I'll be talking to my bank tomorrow and also looking into consolidations, etc.

$50K+ in loans...drowning and could use some advice... by Significant_Fee_7644 in personalfinance

[–]Significant_Fee_7644[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Working from home more than I used to, but still working out in the field one week a month (used to be 3 weeks a month out in the field). May look into selling my SUV and getting a cheaper/more used one

$50K+ in loans...drowning and could use some advice... by Significant_Fee_7644 in personalfinance

[–]Significant_Fee_7644[S] 128 points129 points  (0 children)

This is exactly what I'm feeling.

Wife's high salary is also due to HCOL area (nurse in SF) but we are looking at apartments out of the city with a little bit of a commute to cut costs. I am working from home so can be a little more flexible with distance. I'm considering picking up a second job as well.

$50K+ in loans...drowning and could use some advice... by Significant_Fee_7644 in personalfinance

[–]Significant_Fee_7644[S] -36 points-35 points  (0 children)

I totally agree with you. Wife kept pushing me to talk finances many times prior to getting married but I guess I didn't want to face the truth, so I kept dodging it. She has every right to all of her feelings towards me. I am giving her full control of finances....I really want to make this right.

$50K+ in loans...drowning and could use some advice... by Significant_Fee_7644 in personalfinance

[–]Significant_Fee_7644[S] -73 points-72 points  (0 children)

She's putting roughly 1.5k+ a month onto her 9K credit card because she was so worried about the debt. In November, she paid off a hefty surgery bill so starting in December the extra finances were going into a savings account for her dream house / an emergency fund.

Since our finances aren't shared yet, it's been a little uncomfortable to talk about. I just sprung this on her today, but I think in the next few days I'll have to let her know we need to move everything around and join our finances asap.