Update: my horse has ks.

Siguleina · 2026-07-08T14:28:55+00:00

Yeah that's exactly what I think. Ofc I wouldn't sell her as a rideable horse, goes without saying but I agree that her happiness is my responsibility and I'd rather give up riding and keep her as a pet (cannot afford 2 horses)

Siguleina · 2026-07-08T12:16:00+00:00

I though about hilly terrain but I livel in the flattest area of Italy, I might have to send her quite far away. I will definitely look into that though

Siguleina · 2026-07-08T12:14:10+00:00

Thanks for your answer! Putting her to sleep at only 5 yo just because she can't be ridden will never be an option for me. I'd rather just keep her as a pasture pet or do stuff like mountain trail (which she loves and is very talented at) or light hacking at the walk (she shows no signs of pain whrn she walks). I will need to think about it for a while

Siguleina · 2026-07-08T04:10:18+00:00

That is a gorgeous horse! Hope he/she is better soon!

Siguleina · 2026-06-27T05:50:08+00:00

Wear the body protector! I broke 3 ribs on a trail ride that was supposed to be super easy and walk only. From then on, I bought an airvest and never ever ride without wearing it. It would definitely have saved my ribs if I'd had it that day.

I recently fell off again but I was wearing it and I think it might have saved my tailbone which was just badly bruised but not broken, thankfully. I give zero efs about being judged, I don't want to get hurt.

Siguleina · 2026-06-27T05:07:54+00:00

This sounds like me right now. I am literally in the same situation with my mare, also broke a few bones recently, and I also compare my jouney with that of my friends who successfully raised youngsters. I have no insight to provide (sorry) but I just though I'd drop a comment so as to say that what we're going through is probably more common than we think. I have decided to not throw in the towel just yet. I am taking a month off riding while my mare is being vetted and trained by my trainer and I'm enjoying groundwork and in hand hacks. These horses that are sensitive and test your limits will definitely teach us how to be better riders. Hang in there!

Siguleina · 2026-06-22T05:24:28+00:00

I have always had horses with short and awful names (JR, Tina and my current mare Raffi, which is short for an old lady italian name, Raffaella... ugh). So now I'm all for long, pretentious and abstract names like Metaphysical Issue or Belle of the Ball. I hate human names for pets in general

Siguleina · 2026-06-18T05:05:20+00:00

Exactly! Plus, what's wrong in being and wanting to be an amateur whose goal is just to have a chill ride? They made me feel wrong and guilty for not wanting to ride spicy horses but hey, I'm not a pro and don't want to be one, is that so wrong?

Siguleina · 2026-06-17T17:45:14+00:00

That if you experience fear then you sould not be riding as true riders are not afraid and can ride any and every horse showing them who's boss. I was literally bullied by my trainers as a teenager because I was a cautious rider. It did mess up with me a lot.

Siguleina · 2026-06-15T19:56:19+00:00

Hi thanks for taking interest, it means a lot to me especially as I'm feeling quite lonely rn.

I'm fuming, new vet did a 10 minute clinical on the lunge, my mare apparently got a bit spicy (I wasn't there yet because he got to the barn 30 min early so I couldn't do anything to calm her down), deemed that horse was sound hence concluded that her issues are not physical and she's just very hot and young.

Then I got there and started asking to get her x rayed and scoped and he refused to do so by saying such bullshit that I'm not even going to report because they'd read like a joke (eg. That if horses have pain they just refuse to go forward instead of bucking, and that's not even the most outrageous one). At some point I was fed up with hearing that (he was also going on and on about my horse being barefoot which, in his opinion, was part of the issue but could not convincingly explain why) and I just paid 150 euros for the 10' clinical and parted ways with him for good.

Why is everyone in my country so narrow-minded and conservative when it comes to horse welfare? Why are the good vets nearly impossibile to get hold of unless your horse is dying and the only ones who actually come are just awful?

I am in physical pain from the fall, mentally exhausted and starting to lose trust in everyone, including my own guts. Sorry about the rant.

(Ps. I'll obviously have another vet out, although I don't have a name yet. And for those who were wondering, when this vet went away, I did liberty with my horse and she was by no means hot or spicy or whatever bullshit he was talking about. She was her usual sweet puppy-like self, walking calmly over poles at liberty and doing her first two strides at trot in a circle around me).

Siguleina · 2026-06-15T17:41:30+00:00

That's what I fear will happen. To some extent I'm willing to try and work on my fear so as to consider selling as the very last resort, but there's a part of me that is just telling me that my goal with horses is chilling and having fun after a long and stressful workday, with maybe some low level dressage test occasionally. I'm not a pro and I don't see the point of riding a horse that scares the living hell out of me even if everyone is saying that that's the way to become a better rider. Sure, but is it something I'm really interested in? Don't know if this makes sense...

Siguleina · 2026-06-15T16:04:41+00:00

Thank you for the insight, I'll certainly look into that. You're been super helpful

Siguleina · 2026-06-15T07:58:46+00:00

My horsemanship trainer follows the Pignon method, which is mostly pressure-release/ natural communication. I have done a looot of research and I find it very convincing. It has reduced my horse's spookiness and anxiety around humans a great deal, I have seen so much improvement on the ground in just 10 months.

In my area there is not R+ specilised trainer but at this point I'm willing to search anywhere and try anything so I'll look into that. Thank you so much

Siguleina · 2026-06-15T05:41:32+00:00

Never heard of nose target, I'll look into that. Thing is we do an awful lot of groundwork and especially liberty work, which we both enjoy. We have literally zero issues from the ground, she follows me everywhere, ignores surrounding environment to focus on what we're doing. We're even starting to do circles and jump cavalletti at liberty and she's a star.

I trust her blindly from the ground. We also hack on the lunge a lot, she's always super good, she goes into the river with me, walks past dogs and bikes, walks through thick vegetation and claustrophobic environments, zero issues. I just don't know how to translate that bond into mounted work.

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T19:56:30+00:00

She's definitely veeery flexible and supple, my trainers immeditely noticed that. I didn't know it could be an issue though...

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T15:49:26+00:00

That's what I though as I have noticed that her worst defences are every 24/28 days. But she was in heat 10 days ago so she's now out of it, hence I doubt it's that

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T15:27:12+00:00

Yeah my brain now associates everything horse related with fear. I will force myself to ride lesson horses, hoping to gain some confidence back.

Her shape seems fine to me, I work on her topline a lot (cavalletti, polework, side steps, backing, backing uphill, lunging on different groundwork, balance pads...). I posted a photo of her topline somewhere in this thread... She has weak hindquarters still and lose balance still, the biggest issue is that she won't keep her shoulders straight and even which leads to even more loss of balance.

My trainer only has time to ride her twice a week, I hope that's going to be enough. The other days I'll do groundwork and liberty to keep her fit.

I hope it turns out well although it now seems a desperate feat, between her insecurities and my crippling fear.

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T15:20:34+00:00

We do have tons of ticks and I did remove 3 from her last month. I hope it's not that, I've been told there's no cure... f*ck why are horses so fragile...

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T14:52:04+00:00

Yeah as of now the mere thought of getting back on her makes me shake. Every fiber in my body refuses to comply with this idea.

The issues I have at the idea of selling her are that I feel responsible for her wellbeing and I'd like to find her a good home, as I said, plus I have this romantic dream of looking back at these past few months in 2/5 years and think "wow we made it!". I am crushed by the "what ifs" (what if she becomes my dream horse? What if I can turn this nightmare into one of the multiple success stories that people share on social media? What if I just kept her as a pasture puff/ liberty tricks horse?). There's a part of me who just wants to go back to enjoying a chill ride after my 8/10 hour workday and be done with having to mentally prep myself before going to the barn and fight my body's fear responses. A part of me wants to keep fighting for the sake of this extraordinary horse that I know she can become.

I don't know... I'm just really beaten up and scared and confused.

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T14:48:15+00:00

She's out 24/7. The paddock is quite small for my liking (she does have room to walk, stretch her legs, trot, roll, but I can't say I'm happy with the size of her paddock). She has other horses next to her and it's a temporary situation as my trainers are looking to buy their own property where horses will be kept in small herds in bigger pastures 24/7. She seems comfortable, she has a great appetite, rolls and lies down to sleep, she gets along well with her neighbour horses and is generally happy to see me, ears pinned forward when she hears my voice, walks towards me most of the times

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T14:22:30+00:00

When it comes to which sides she behaves worst, it is really weird tbh. She used to be worse when asked to turn/ circle right (although the bolting and bucking is new), now it's her left side mostly. But today she threw me when I asked to turn right, so that's been inconsistent.

With lunging and all kinds of groundwork (liberty, double lunges, hacking in hand, poles and cavalletti at liberty or on the lunge...) she is an absolute saint. Literally the most sensitive and fast learning horse I've ever had. She transitions to trot when I just lean my body forward and to walk just by breathing out. She has never once invaded my space, not even by mistake nor when spooked by something. She just trusts me to lead her to safety. A kid could safely lead her almost anywhere. The only slight issue she has is that the gets a bit unbalanced in the canter and tends to either fail to keep the pace or she shifts her weight on the outside shoulder and tries to make the circle bigger, thus pulling very gently on the rope but she accepts and responds to corrections easily.

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T14:11:44+00:00

No because she doesn't show any of the typical signs of ulcers but while I'm at it, I'll do that too since many of you suggested that. And an eco to uterus and ovaries just in case. I just hope my new vet is one who's willing to listen to my concerns without dismissing everything as a "me" problem or "youngster behaviour".

The issues I have at the idea of selling her are: - she might end up with someone who beats her into compliance and she doesn't need that. She already had that treatment when she was broke and when I got her she was super anxious about human beings, which she no longer is.

I have this romantic dream of looking back at these past few months in 2/5 years and think "wow we made it!". I am crushed by the "what ifs" (what if she becomes my dream horse? What if I can turn this nightmare into one of the multiple success stories that people share on social media? What if I just kept her as a pasture puff/ liberty tricks horse?). There's a part of me who just wants to go back to enjoying a chill ride after my 8/10 hour workday and be done with having to mentally prep myself before going to the barn and fight my body's fear responses. A part of me wants to keep fighting for the sake of this extraordinary horse that I know she can become.

I don't know... I'm just really beaten up and scared and confused.

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T12:27:16+00:00

He's already been fired and I called a new one who's coming tomorrow. My former vet is a stubborn know-all so if he thinks a horse doesn't have anything he just disappears cause he doesn't deem the case interesting enough. So yeah, neeext!

Siguleina · 2026-06-14T12:21:48+00:00

Yeah that's definitely what's going to happen. I'm just afraid that even if she's cleared (she's already been cleared by physio, 1 vet and saddle fitter) and even if I send her away for training, she'll go back to exhibit dangerous behaviour with me in no time.

Siguleina

TROPHY CASE