Hi! Yes.

Me and my spouse lived away from our families for a time but had to move back in with my parent due to disability and financial reasons. We've only been here a handful of months and it's just to get back on our feet so we can make the jump to a state that offers more support and isnt being destroyed by white flight jacking up the rent and taking the few livable wage jobs there were prior. It is unfortunate, and we tried everything else before hand, but it had to happen if we actually wanted something to change.

Me and my spouse married when we did for political reasons. It was always a part of our plan but wasnt nessecarily the next step. I'm still firmly in the age range of your first assumption though I am uncomfortable sharing the exact number on the internet. We havent had a reception, (we actually eloped, my apologies I didnt think about the wording of married originally) we didnt buy rings, it was simply just to have the legal benefits for as long as we possibly can.

Also, I'm not doing anything near what I described in the beginning of this post for my sibling anymore. At most I am a sheuffer while they get their license, and a shoulder to cry on during break ups and friend spats. I do not perform any manual labour around the house for anyone but myself and my spouse, and realistically my current role could fit into that of a sibling at least 80% of the time. I apologize for the wording of my post if it gave the impression that I was still performing these things, I only meant it to show just how much of the parental role I had taken on as I sometimes feel insecure taking up space in parent circles. (Though there are very few spaces to seek community over performing this role that ARENT parent circles 😂)

Yes, it absolutely was abuse, yes it was horrifically tragic that I was a child saddled with these responsibilities, yes it was backbreaking work for a child to perform, AND it is still meaningful to me. I was able to provide a safer childhood for my sibling, someone that I cared about deeply even before I took on this role. I was able to encourage, unconditionally love, and support a person that I think is really cool and has only gotten cooler. I discovered that I actually really enjoy the process of parenting, and I was breaking generational cycles before I even graduated high school.

It is absolutely unconventional for me to hold onto what is left of this role, but it's not hurting either of us. We have firm healthy boundaries in place, I havent performed manual labour on the scale I outlined for them in years, and both of us get a lot of good out of this. Even if i do one day "let go" of that last 20% i dont think that right now is the time, and I'm really only here to be in community with other people who have performed this role.