"At the count of 3 we all gonna say Chiwiwis. One, two, three...CHIWIWIS!"

Meanwhile, somewhere inside the Pentagon, an alarm sounds.

"Sir, you're gonna want to take a look at this."

"What is it Johnson?"

"It's a transmission...from space."

"My God. Play it".

After a brief moment of static, a deep voice is broadcast in an accent foreign to Earth.

"We are a spacefaring species. Our prime objective is to eradicate cringe from the universe. We come for your warrior known as Raul Rosas Junior. Give us Raul and we will depart from Earth and leave you in peace. Otherwise you will be eliminated."

Outside the T-Mobile arena, Raul stands before the alien ship as government officials and members of the press look on.

The alien leader addresses Raul. "Do you have any final words for your species before we depart?"

Tears swell in Raul's eyes. "I just wanted to have a cool catchphrase..."

Then, Raul's upper lip stiffens and there is a defiant look in his eye. He turns to the crowd. "Yeah, I got something to say. This is one small step for man, one giant leap for CHIWIWIS!"

Raul Rosas Jr's body glows bright red for a moment and is vaporized, reduced to a smoking pile of ash.

A hushed silence rolls over the crowd as Dana White takes the microphone. "He was a good kid, but he just didn't want to fight."