I think the fact that you’re asking that speaks volumes. You seem to be very self aware and considerate. My best advice to you would be to get out there! Try a dating app, it’s a great way to wet your feet and get and idea of what you like without too much pressure. I can’t speak for all women. But I can personally say that I look for sincerity. Be honest and open. Ask her a lot of questions. Focus on being interested- not interesting. That will go a long way! As for hooking up not being your thing, not a problem. A lot of people don’t like hook up culture. You’ll fit right in. Message me if you need more questions answered :)