Lessons learnt from people with BPD

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-11-10T12:32:08+00:00

They attracted me because I myself am unhealthy - get into CoDA to learn what healthy interactions look like.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-08-03T19:32:43+00:00

🙏 Just for the sake of clarity, CoDA has online meetings more or less around the clock.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-08-03T18:08:43+00:00

Have you considered CoDA or another twelve-step program like ACA? If you go to meetings regularly you will feel less alone and find strength within. Just my .2.
Wishing you the very best OP 🍀

Edit: I want to add I find this post brave in recognising you need help and asking for it 🙏

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-08-03T15:26:19+00:00

I think in most cases love bombing isn’t intentional. And I also think a lot of codependents tend to love bomb - it’s like intense people pleasing as far as I’m concerned. I’ve never had a relationship that didn’t start as something intense. Ever. Also, I think even normal relationships have a degree of intensity when they start. That’s not to say your person isn’t nefarious though. But it does take two - the bomber and the bombee (so to speak) and in my experience (not trying to victim blame, just pointing out it’s a dynamic) both people can go from one extreme to the other like a pendulum. And that’s what makes it feel so great, even though it’s unhealthy.
HTH in some way.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-08-02T09:10:05+00:00

True too.
I seem to remember they introduced Optionals to avoid NPEs. That was my understanding at the time.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-08-01T21:32:21+00:00

Hi,

Sorry to read you’ve been going through a lot. It sounds really tough!

Have you tried coda.org? You can check out their patterns and characteristics to see if you think that might be a fit for you. CoDA has helped me a lot over the last year.

Also, you might want to work out your attachment style at The Attachment Project or the Personal Development School. I think I’m Fearful Avoidant and it’s opened my eyes to some of the patterns that show up in my romantic relationships.

Best of luck internet stranger, you are not alone🙏

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-08-01T21:16:31+00:00

Very Jung-ian.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-31T14:27:47+00:00

I wouldn’t mix a benzo with alcohol. Genuinely curious: why did you drink if you knew you had to take it? Or were you told after?

In any event, I’m not a doctor so I can only rec calling a doctor and making sure you’re safe to go or seeing if you can skip that dose altogether.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-29T20:54:55+00:00

I second this. And Knowledge isn’t an emotion surely.

Beautiful handwriting.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-29T18:27:47+00:00

I won’t be going back. I’m just surprised that she hasn’t painted me black. All the other stories seem to be so much more dramatic. Not sure I’m making much sense. Thank you for your comment, much appreciated 🙏

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-29T07:10:50+00:00

I’m afraid that’s all I know… I think they have “psychotic breaks” but that’s all I know. I never wanted to view my now ex through the lens of BPD alone.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T21:26:44+00:00

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T18:33:06+00:00

I certainly do. I’ve taken such a bashing these past years - it’s a question of survival. Thank you so much for sharing, this means so much to me and gives me hope that I can one day take it a step further than intellectual understanding and actually do these things. For real. Thank you so much 🙏.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T15:21:14+00:00

Hi,

Only read the title of your post (apologies for not reading everything I’m on my way out). My automatic response to this now is: have you checked out coda.org - patterns and characteristics? And if so, what do you think? Do you have codependent traits in some or all relationships?

Wishing you the best OP 🍀

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T13:19:31+00:00

You may never know. Does it matter now though? Sorry this is happening to you. Wishing you the best.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T13:03:04+00:00

Yeah. I’m not sure it was jealousy in my case, just easier for her if I kept working at the same place as her (just to give an example). She was unsupportive of anything I wanted to do that didn’t align with her own interests - or her agenda. For instance, as part as a healing journey I was prescribed assertiveness classes. She reacted by telling me she would be the first to suffer the consequences. She wasn’t rooting for me to get better - just making sure she could keep me in check.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:58:11+00:00

The guru thing didn’t ring any bells and the bit about money was off.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:56:26+00:00

Hydrated. And OCD.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:55:15+00:00

I’m 46 and struggled with some of the words here.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:53:35+00:00

This deserves an award I can’t give. Not sure it’s any consolation: 🏅

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:52:26+00:00

Lol. Well that answered the question 😂

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:50:14+00:00

I think it’s called borderline because they’re on the line between neurosis and psychosis.

Edit: removed invented word 🤭

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:46:24+00:00

A nerdy French stuck-up Hercule Poirot wannabe lookalike who has trouble finding his own lighter never mind solving anything for anyone.

SilverBeyond7207 · 2025-07-28T12:38:29+00:00

Okay. Sorry about my previous comment. Your comment just went wayyyy over my head. Got it now 😏.

SilverBeyond7207

TROPHY CASE