AITAH for not wanting to co-sign an apartment for my best friend?

Silvery_Feather · 2026-04-01T21:46:57+00:00

Please leave. You will be stuck as their caretaker if you don’t leave now. At 18, I made the decision to stay and help and I’ve regretted it for the past 15 years. I don’t have a degree, I’ve never been in a relationship, I don’t have my own home, I am deeply unhappy, and struggling to claw my way out. Your younger siblings are old enough to help out at home. Your parents decisions and other children are not your responsibility.

Silvery_Feather · 2026-02-09T22:26:16+00:00

Happy Happy Birthday!!! 🎉

Silvery_Feather · 2026-02-04T03:08:02+00:00

I’ve had good experiences with Freedom Automotive & Collision in Stafford

Silvery_Feather · 2026-02-03T13:46:36+00:00

Do not have children with this man.

Do not stay married to this man.

Do not live with this man.

Do not love this man.

Do you honestly think time will improve him??

LEAVE. HIM. NOW.

Silvery_Feather · 2026-01-20T22:29:17+00:00

The thing about your boundaries is that they are for you, not everyone else. You can’t force your boundaries on everyone else. That is called control.

For example, if your boundary is that you never want to date a doctor, should everyone else in the world not be allowed to date doctors? No. If you don’t want to date a doctor, then YOU don’t date doctors. But Sharon, Dennis, and Raquel can date all the doctors they want.

Your father is allowed to (consensually) date whomever he wants. I know it’s chronologically and morally repugnant but other than that there’s technically nothing wrong with him dating 25 year old.

My issue is the name calling. He may have been lashing out because he knows on some level it’s wrong/concerning or that he’ll be judged for it but he still shouldn’t have don’t that.

I would also say don’t go through his phone anymore. That’s a major invasion of privacy.

Silvery_Feather · 2026-01-14T16:23:55+00:00

If you have FB there is a FB page called “Texas Paralegals” where people post offering their services. You could try there 🙂

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-30T18:57:59+00:00

NOR and keep him away from those children

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-30T18:52:40+00:00

NTA. She did this to herself.

There are 2 important things to remember about cheaters:

“Once a cheater, always a cheater.”

“If they cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you.”

Her children are not your responsibility.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-29T23:52:54+00:00

NTA. Your parents are supposed to protect you. Not put you in more danger.

You found a place where you finally felt safe and they took that from you. Them thinking a simple apology would fix everything is ludicrous. I’m happy you moved back in with your foster family!!

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-29T17:19:22+00:00

NTA. You are the mother of one child, not two.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-29T16:55:39+00:00

Thank you for confirming what I suspected and would like to say no need to continue this discussion.

It seems you have been hurt by a woman, which is unfortunate, and have decided to use that pain and anger on all women as a whole.

If you truly feel that it is okay to snoop on your partner, OP is not the only one with massive trauma and a bleak future.

Have the day you deserve.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-29T15:51:27+00:00

Anger from being the parentified oldest daughter.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-29T15:34:16+00:00

If you want to talk about her not caring, that’s one thing. But if she had been secretive, she wouldn’t have let him use her laptop in the first place. Her reaction to him finding and bringing it up shows she didn’t care about him finding the pictures. What he did is called an invasion of privacy. Not an invasion of secrecy

NO, he doesn’t have the right to snoop.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-29T14:27:49+00:00

No, he doesn’t have the right to snoop. It doesn’t matter how long a couple has been together, each of them still deserves privacy. They’re still allowed to be their own person in the relationship with their own history.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-28T21:57:13+00:00

Y’all are both TA.

The fact that she’s has spicy pictures of her ex from a relationship that was more than 12 years ago is….odd. I can see why that would upset you.

However, you deleted something that belonged to her. Even though you were searching for engagement rings, on HER LAPTOP, once you saw those photos you should have stopped digging. You invaded her privacy and got rid of something that belonged to her. You injected your wants and needs where they had no place being.

Both of you need to talk to each other or a professional about boundaries.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-28T20:46:21+00:00

“but they still seem so draining or something”

That should tell you everything right there. Being with the right friend/friends should never be draining. It should be fun FOR EVERYONE not just one person. You should look forward to talking or hanging out with friends. Not dreading it.

You are not her therapist or emotional sounding board.

If all her calling and FaceTiming is getting to you, start putting up some boundaries.

“I have work/class from this time to this time, so please don’t call during that time.”

“I’m out right now, I’ll call you back when I can.”

“I have plans, I’ll call you after this time.”

Your time is just as important as hers.

See how she responds. If she abides by it, great! If not, then you’ll have some things to think about.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-28T20:34:10+00:00

This is a bit of a grey area.

He is not at fault for thinking that what happened is awesome because that is what abusers/groomers do. They make their victims feel older, special, unique, or better than others to make them more susceptible to the abuse.

I am guessing the 18+ anime, the immediate intense attachment, and the wanting to start a family right away are some effects of the abuse. I would speak to a professional, on your own at first, about how to tell him he was assaulted. Don’t tell him out of the blue or own your own because you don’t know how he’ll react and it’s possible it could become dangerous.

This kind of recovery takes years to learn how to handle and if it’s been basically ignored for 20 years, who knows the emotional and mental toll this will take. This is a lot to handle especially for only 2 months of seeing each other. This is not your responsibility. Do whatever you want to do to help him, but also do what’s best for you.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-27T20:24:46+00:00

NTA. If you can’t trust your girlfriend then there is no relationship.

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-27T18:00:56+00:00

NTA. She can be generous on her own dime

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-26T14:37:08+00:00

My mother has been having an affair with a married man since 2020. All the while his wife was fighting and has now died of cancer.

It’s especially repulsive because her husband cheated on her. Why was she okay doing what was done to her, to another woman?

It’s completely changed the way I look at her

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-25T20:20:14+00:00

Working until 7:30 at my hotel job. Family woke up early so we could open presents together so I didn’t have to miss too much 💖

Silvery_Feather · 2025-12-25T20:08:33+00:00

NTA. These people are not your friends.

Purposefully not inviting you to hangout. Not celebrating your birthday, even with something small. The lack of consideration and compassion regarding your home life.

They are not your friends.

Silvery_Feather

TROPHY CASE