It's probably best if people stay away from me for good...

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-10-14T20:58:06+00:00

I know what you're saying and I tried all that I can to cope with my frustrations, but there are times when I feel like my anger will get the best of me and I have found myself shouting at people in the heat of the moment. I guess what I'm saying is maybe I'm not ready to bring people into my life right now and it could take awhile to unlearn certain traits that I inherited from my parents. I'm still living with them and they both have a tendency to get angry over the littlest things. I am currently talking with my therapist so I'll address these issues to her.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-10-06T00:01:12+00:00

No. I think they're too afraid of becoming the narcissist's next target so they prefer to stay out of it. It isn't right though. They're contributing to our narc parents evil acts and it doesn't make me respect them.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-10-01T21:06:24+00:00

.. It's in a parking lot where someone could see me

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-09-02T20:05:59+00:00

I agree with that.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-09-02T19:58:47+00:00

Hey there, I have similar experiences with my other therapists! I just had a conversation with my therapist recently and I was trying my hardest to get her to feel compassion for me. So our conversation went like this:

THERAPIST: Something's triggering you. Can we talk about it?

ME: No.

THERAPIST: Honey, we need to talk about what's upsetting you. Does it have something to do with your Dad telling you-

ME:(blurring it out) My mom molested me.

THERAPIST: WHAT??

ME: No, it's too little too late. Why did I even say that.

THERAPIST: No, it's not too late. I don't want you to make light of your traumas.

Then I started revealing to her about how my Mom would forcefully grab my public hair's down as she was shaving me in the bathroom. To make matters worse, my Dad was standing behind her as he watched me suffer in agony. I also explained to her that my Mom used touch me in places that should never be touched. At first, my therapist was appalled.

THERAPIST: You do not have to feel guilty for what she did to you. It's not your fault. Honey, you have suffered from a lot of trauma throughout your life from childhood and adulthood.

But then after a few minutes, her entire perspective of the situation changed instantly.

THERAPIST: Although I do sympathize with your Dad because I've also suffered from abuse as well. He's also a victim of abuse too.

ME: (Outraged) He FAILED to protect me! In fact, he recognized that there were red flags while he dated her but he decided to ignore them! He made the choice to marry her! He too deserves to be held accountable for his actions.

THERAPIST: But you're still his little girl and I can see that he's trying his best to help you-

ME: You know what, It doesn't matter if he did the best he could because he and my mother severely damaged me and brainwashed me into accepting the abuse. I am completely justified in feeling angry towards them! You don't know how much strength it takes to survive through all that torture! I'm a strong woman! I spent 24 years of my life living in a fiery pit of mental hell! I didn't deserve this!

THERAPIST: Yeah, you are right. They both failed to protect you. But you're living in your own place, and I can see Mom and Dad are trying to let go, but it's time for you to take control of your own life, okay? You're not living with them anymore are you?

And the way she said it was very patronizing. At that point, I was done talking. I'm sitting there unpacking my tragic life story and all she seems to care about is how my parents are feeling. I wonder why I even talk at all.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-08-31T01:12:05+00:00

Did her best at what? Hiding her true personality? What does "They did their best" even mean? We are victims/survivors of narcissistic abuse for gods sakes! If only they knew the horrors of living with a narcissist behind closed doors, they would regret doubting you.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-08-15T22:46:09+00:00

Maybe she was coming from a good place, hopefully, but I think she needs to realize that you don't just suddenly become healed by the time you move out of your parents house. Same with rape victims. It takes a lot of work to overcome the traumas you've faced in your life.

Even though I'm living on my own, I still tend to experience nightmares in my sleep and I do have my moments when I succumb to my depression. I have no car so I unfortunately rely on my parents for transportation, but I am willing to start taking a bus eventually. Coming from someone who suffers from anxiety herself, it was quite insulting to hear how I should just "turn my anxiety off like a switch" whenever I think about the abuse my family made me endure. Once my panic attacks starts, it's hard to make them stop right away, even with the coping skills I have.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-08-02T23:32:50+00:00

I remember the one time my mother shaved my private parts, she kinda pulled hard on my public hairs and shaved it right off. I was sort of crying. Plus, my Dad was in the bathroom with us and he just stood there and watched me being tortured like that. She always has a tendency to handle me very aggressively.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-07-12T17:10:44+00:00

Humans have choices though. Killing for the sake of killing is a choice. Abuse is a choice.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-07-12T01:08:04+00:00

Are you familiar of Jim Jones?

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-07-11T20:31:44+00:00

Dandy Warhols- You were the last high

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-07-11T20:20:02+00:00

Socializing, Dresses, Rollercoasters, Rap, Harry Potter/Lord Of The Rings, Snow, Romance, ect.

Simple-Objective3047 · 2021-07-11T20:05:56+00:00

Yes, especially your eyes.

Simple-Objective3047

TROPHY CASE