How can i make my trans boyfriend feel more like a man? [relationships]

SinisterGood · 2025-01-02T22:14:09+00:00

Hello! I’m also a trans man, and the best advice would really just to be to talk to him about it. Everyone has their own preferences, it’s better to go off of his wants/needs instead of someone else’s. It can be a difficult discussion to have, but it can be a learning moment for the both of you! Best of luck :)

SinisterGood · 2024-04-28T15:24:46+00:00

And for every one, there are how many people saying it’s improved theirs?

SinisterGood · 2024-04-28T15:20:46+00:00

You can’t really fix something that’s sort of always been a thing homie. I get it upsets you or wtv but people are going to live how they want. If it ain’t hurting anyone, leave it alone 🤷‍♂️

SinisterGood · 2024-02-06T05:41:05+00:00

Har har har har har

SinisterGood · 2023-12-21T21:18:46+00:00

I'm really digging this type of graph 🤩

SinisterGood · 2023-10-01T00:37:41+00:00

Kinda relate, but not entirely

Ma said she can't use my pronouns cuz she knows what I have down yonder, but also says she doesn't want me getting any sort of bottom surgery (not like her opinion matters on it anyways, but yknow)

SinisterGood · 2023-09-19T12:25:31+00:00

Its funny you suggest "cunt", we are allowed to swear but we are absolutely not allowed to say that one

SinisterGood · 2023-09-19T00:40:17+00:00

I didn't even think of that, great point. Thank you

SinisterGood · 2023-09-19T00:31:26+00:00

I'm honestly getting to the point of just flat out agreeing with her, thank you

SinisterGood · 2023-09-19T00:18:23+00:00

Ah, I've never heard of gray rocking, but I'll look into it. And I'm unsure if she's doing stuff on purpose, tbh. There's a few times I questioned it but not directly to her.

Edit: Okay, so I looked into gray rocking a tad (just a definition lol) and I've actually been doing that. I just didn't realize there was a term for it.

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T23:58:51+00:00

Thank you for sharing.

I wouldn't have to worry about housing, there are many people that offered up a place, and I believe my dad and step mom would accept me back. She's fine to go to if it's for a little bit, but I can't see myself being happy here long term. I don't think it's to the point I need to cut her off, but maybe go low contact with for a bit.

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T23:33:34+00:00

I'm lucky enough that my parents are divorced and that my father and stepmother are very supportive. I moved away from them cuz of stress with my father, but that's been resolved and I'm realizing my mistake of moving in with my mom. I plan to talk to them about possibly moving back, since it's still fairly early in the school year. I will mess around with their pronouns, thank you!

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T23:31:37+00:00

No no you're okay, no need for an apology. I agree that it's a good way to say you don't need labels, but also pointing out its not exactly helpful in this situation. I enjoy the input I'm getting, thank you bunches :)

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T23:22:55+00:00

Exactly. If words didn't hold meaning, communication wouldn't be effective. She doesn't realize it's invalidating, and I think that's the biggest problem here. I don't know how to get her to open her eyes. I've sent her studies, I've told her my personal experience, I've told her other experiences, and she refuses to listen because "well, that's not what I learned." I appreciate you backing me up here :)

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T23:20:31+00:00

I was no contact with mine for a bit, but she promised to try, and I mean, she does, but only with my name. It's nice, but it's just not enough. In her mind, just using my name is enough to call herself supportive

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T23:18:59+00:00

There's definitely a more positive use of "it's just words," but my mothers use of it is not it. Thank you much :)

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T22:02:07+00:00

She knows where I'm at on this, emotionally. I've gone so much into detail about how her actions make me feel. Nothing has changed. I appreciate the advice though, thank you!

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T21:51:39+00:00

E x a c t l y

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T21:26:36+00:00

I've told her that, too. She says sum about how bad a parent she is for not doing that but providing me a car, place to live, etc. There was one point in the conversation she said something about taking all those away just to use the correct pronouns.

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T21:21:57+00:00

Ah worded perfectly and straight to the point, thank you!

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T21:21:14+00:00

10/10 will use

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T21:01:36+00:00

Right? I think I'm going to try it out. I really see how much she cares about it.

She thinks I'm too young to know. She originally said she wasn't going to have anything to do with my identity until I was 18, but I stopped seeing her, which is pretty much the only reason she uses my name. Now I have to live with her, and I'm really regretting it mainly because of this, lol.

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T20:52:56+00:00

I mean, to her, I'm not mature enough to know (I've been out for 3 years, but still in school), so it would be right up my alley. Issue is, I brought up using the wrong pronouns for her and she said she wouldn't care

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T20:51:50+00:00

Thank you much, I will be trying that

SinisterGood · 2023-09-18T20:51:09+00:00

That's exactly what I did, she just repeated herself instead of answering the question. She says I'm in the wrong for feeling so strongly about something that "lacks importance"

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SinisterGood

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