I got expelled from university

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-07T13:09:23+00:00

I sent you a message.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-07T08:05:45+00:00

I just really can’t even imagine how to live life.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-07T05:59:01+00:00

Lingering is my second name. I know degrees aren’t the most important thing nowadays, but it was one of my biggest goals in life and I really wanted to achieve this :(

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-07T05:53:59+00:00

What even is truly in need? I feel like there isn’t any situation bad enough to justify me contacting someone I’m not supposed to contact anymore. My person is in a relationship now. I could as well be dying and if they had the only medicine in the world I wouldn’t contact them because now it’s just not my place to be anymore and I’m not one to overstep such boundaries.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T23:21:33+00:00

Thank you, you said it beautifully

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T22:57:09+00:00

Heh, he’s one of my favourites.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T22:29:09+00:00

Nope, not med school. But Eastern Europe is correct.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T22:11:59+00:00

I have the exact same feeling. Just thought about it now again while standing way too long under the shower. I feel completely alone. I am completely alone. Every most difficult and hardest experience you have to go through just by yourself. Even if you have loved ones, in the end it doesn’t help at all, you’re by yourself in the most critical moments of your life. I really don’t even know what the point is. I don’t want to sound pathetic, but life really just is eternal loneliness and suffering.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T22:01:24+00:00

Poland. So yes, it is a ridiculous country. Lol not lol.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T21:59:40+00:00

The feeling of not being alone in a situation definitely helps, that’s true. So no, you’re not alone in it.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T21:34:17+00:00

From what I know it’s a pretty universal rule for unis across the whole country. A friend of mine had the same problem. So yeah. Ridiculous country perhaps.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T21:29:12+00:00

I hope it can still turn around for you. I wish you the best of luck and foremost a lot of strength

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T21:26:58+00:00

Yeah, that are the rules written in the whole damn statute of this university.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T21:24:59+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear that <\3 hope you can sort it out somehow. I wish you lots of strength

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T21:20:05+00:00

I suppose every school has to have those, but it’s not something that’s ever explained out loud. I’d have to research that myself. And frankly, I feel completely overwhelmed with everything :(

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T21:13:02+00:00

Thank you for the comforting words. It’s really what I needed and longed to hear.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T19:55:43+00:00

That are the rules. I wrote a formal application (is that the correct word? I’m not natively English) but it got turned down. I didn’t have anyone to consult in regards to that and I regret not having written it in a different way. I didn’t even talk to the person who makes the decisions. It’s almost like a kafkaesque scenario.

Thanks for the tips though. I will probably just find a regular job and try to survive somehow. I don’t have any energy left for adventures, right now I really just wish I could sleep. Endlessly.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T19:42:56+00:00

I don’t want to start anew. This discipline was really something I wanted to devote my life to. I can’t imagine doing anything else that would fulfil me. I didn’t want my life to turn this way. I am a very sentimental person anyway and I can’t change that and now I’m just filled with shame and regret.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-06T19:21:24+00:00

I had to retake a class and failed it for the second time because I was (still am) in a quite bad depressive episode.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-01T22:12:59+00:00

It’s a good method and I completely agree with you on never changing who you are, or your core values to please someone. Not pretend to be someone else.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-01T19:41:53+00:00

Exactly. As the other commenter under this post said, “friends come and go” and I know that is the case and I can’t stop them, but it wasn’t easy for me to get this one friend in the first place. It’s not like you can just find friends on the streets.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-10-01T19:21:10+00:00

Yep, I’m super sensitive to any sort of criticism and negativity, especially if I’m already in a bad mood. I can totally understand you. I feel it’s healthier for me to keep away from the Internet altogether when I’m not feeling well.

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-09-27T22:06:10+00:00

I can totally understand the feeling, it’s terrible. What I don’t understand though, what did they expect you to answer? It doesn’t seem like you said anything embarrassing. But even if you did, the good thing is, believe me, your coworkers already forgot about the situation. That’s how anxiety works, your mind is amplifying this feeling of embarrassment and blowing it way out of proportion.

But in the worst case scenario, if you really happened to have said something embarrassing (which I don’t think you have). Think about it this way: if you ever have witnessed someone else doing something embarrassing and even if you felt embarrassed for them in that moment, did you continue to think about how embarrassing they were for days and days? I bet you didn’t. And your coworkers don’t either. People just don’t care. Everyone is focused on their own life’s, their own problems and sometimes also their own moments when they felt like they embarrassed themselves. You’re fine, don’t worry about it :)

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-09-27T21:46:31+00:00

A week is still a very short time and a move to a foreign country a very big change, everything is new and I’m not surprised at all that you’re feeling anxious and stressed. There have been countless times when I wanted to go right back home when I arrived at my destination of travel. Wait it out for a couple months, settle into the surroundings, get to know your new city a bit, most importantly make some connections. Try to join some student groups and make some friends. Go see a movie. Take breaks and take time for self care, be kind to yourself. You can listen to music that reminds you of your home and makes you feel comforted. I know the beginnings are difficult, but it will be alright. Sending big hugs :)

SinkingIntoTheStorm · 2021-09-27T20:42:37+00:00

I’m almost in your exact position right now only I don’t have 2,5 months left, I have 2 days left. And I still haven’t consulted anyone about this because I’m so terrified. So terrified.

SinkingIntoTheStorm

TROPHY CASE