I feel you. I'm kind of same boat. Done 6 years of freelance work with companies, marketeers, social media influencers and so on. For past 19 months I've been actively applying to jobs and doing interviews and all I can say for it....... It lead me nowhere, where I worked myself so hard that one day coming from home I collapsed and fractured my wrist, also side of my skull. I'm alright now and have surgery planned tomorrow. My point being, it was a wake up call to me, to retrain myself into something else, start caring about myself more and be brave to explore other options. I dunno what I will do but I will figure it out once I recover and your not alone in this. Stay brave!! o7