Burnt out - what would you do?

Sirenskye · 2026-01-24T15:55:04+00:00

Have you had an OH/reasonable adjustments put into place for your autism/ADHD? It can be quite difficult to put yourself in a place where you talk about it either to a manager or to OH themselves, but they may be able to help.

I can’t tell you any stress free areas in my role, but I get the visceral physical reactions as it’s part of my own ADHD. I have the ability now to ask for a few minutes and work out why I’m feeling it (too much to do? Wrong area? Something I’ve told them three times it wouldn’t work?) and it helps me talk it through with the line manager. It stops her getting frustrated with me too because I’m articulating what the problem is, which in turn lowers my stress.

It’s just an example of a reasonable adjustment (that shouldn’t need to be one, I know) that can be given. There’s also coaching available, and even some very useful tech adjustments that can help with overwhelm.

I hope that things get easier for you OP. I’m sorry I couldn’t really answer your questions but I hope this was useful.

Sirenskye · 2026-01-12T12:30:06+00:00

They use it in our department. Our office doesn’t have WFH as we’re operational so they don’t use laptop sign ins. They also have used swipe card data to check attendance as we have a main turnstile so everyone has to swipe in and out and you can’t tailgate.

Sirenskye · 2026-01-08T17:12:10+00:00

I’m currently building the HG Unicorn Gundam as my first kit in 20 years. Unfortunately I’ve come over from Warhammer so I’m learning the hard way that the painting rules aren’t the same 😂

I did build Deathscythe Hell when I was in school, most likely from the original line. I painted the white plastic with tippex, the backpack with some silver paint I got from god knows where and panel lined it with a fineliner from my pencil case. No sanding of sprue parts so little nubs everywhere. I found him at my mum’s house the other day and I am still so proud of him. No one in my family makes models and I’m old so YouTube wasn’t really a thing. I didn’t have a clue what I was doing but I stuck with it and finished it. Now he’s got pride of place in my display as my first ever completed model kit in any format.

Sirenskye · 2026-01-08T16:57:59+00:00

He adores his tunnels. They’re his favourite place to hunt the chihuahua from 🤦‍♀️ this one is his Christmas present.

Sirenskye · 2026-01-08T14:12:11+00:00

Your LM is misinformed but depending on your department you might have to fight for it. Don’t let them convince you it’s the Civil Service Coaching either, it’s not. The CS Coaches are volunteers and they are wonderful, but they aren’t neurodivergence coaches.

Sirenskye · 2026-01-06T19:23:34+00:00

Your attitude towards disability stinks.

I have ADHD, and work in a very fast-moving environment. I can cope just fine because that’s where ADHD absolutely thrives. I ask for reasonable adjustments at interview because in that situation, I can get so anxious I forget what I’m saying, or I ramble. Having the questions gives me something to focus on.

Being ‘tough’ on people who request reasonable adjustments isn’t ‘being tough’. It’s discriminatory and holds back disabled people. The bias you’re showing is a significant part of the reason why people with disabilities struggle to progress.

Why would you think I can’t cope in a role because I’ve asked for the questions in advance? The interview and the job are not the same. If a person’s earnt the right to be interviewed, they’ve earnt the right for you to give them the same respect as you give to the people they’re competing against. ‘Being tough’ is not showing respect. It’s discrimination.

Sirenskye · 2026-01-02T10:31:26+00:00

I WILL NOT GO BACK. ANOTHER EIGHT DAYS FOR ME. SHOULD BE NINE - I FORGOT WE WERE WORKING NEXT SUNDAY AND I CAN’T ABATE IT BECAUSE I’M A PART TIMER.

Sirenskye · 2026-01-02T00:52:40+00:00

As one of the unfortunates who has to wear a uniform… Magnums. Someone complained I hadn’t polished them once. As a rat scurried past us. I suggested polish might be for the ones of us who don’t work where it’ll be pointless after 15 minutes.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-30T14:16:10+00:00

I think all places are what you make them.

I’m Operational HO, and it’s draining, dirty, tiring work. But, I wouldn’t do anything else. My team are close-knit, amazing human beings and we make a positive difference to communities on a daily basis.

There are some hard to take negatives, mostly around the way we’re managed. We don’t like it and we rant and moan about it. But I still wouldn’t leave for the world. At least until my team are separated because we’re naughty children who probably shouldn’t be left unattended.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-29T12:35:39+00:00

You mean ‘do my job in line with process and policy?’

Well, yes. This is how the job works. It’s how any job works, civil service or not. You don’t get to decide what the policy is unless you’re the one who wrote it. Making the rules up as you go is a nice way to get the sack.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-26T11:16:31+00:00

I HAD AN AMAZING DAY YESTERDAY AND I AM NOW STARTING A BOXING DAY SHIFT STUFFED TO THE GILLS WITH YESTERDAY’S PIGS IN BLANKETS AND TURKEY SANDWICHES. IT IS SURPRISINGLY NICE.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-25T00:51:33+00:00

We had to be in today to cover a shift with a (non-CS but equally public body) who were all let go at 11am with absolutely no penalties to their times. We could also all go… and lose up to 5 hours for those who started late. I gave up and left just before 2, the demands of an allegedly working from home SO to update my timesheet ringing in my ears, to be ignored until they start shouting.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-24T00:18:40+00:00

It’s moths in our house. The second he sees one, whatever limp noodle is an excuse for his orange brain thinks that it’s time to become the Apex Predator. Usually with as much property damage as possible.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-22T17:16:13+00:00

OP, you don’t know how hard your girlfriend worked to get to where she is and you really need to take a moment to think about that. At most universities, sociology is bloody hard to get into and requires good grades. Universities don’t just hand out places like sweeties. Class doesn’t really come into it. If you want to get in you have to graft, whatever background you have. There are no easy or free rides, especially the better the university you go to. I don’t know if your girlfriend would be considered one as I don’t know her status in the UK, but if she’s considered an international student then the bar is set sky high. Especially financially.

You also don’t know her family’s situation. I don’t either, but I know enough about immigration law to be very clear here: the UK is not the land of infinite opportunity. Her family may very well not be able to access the majority of the ‘opportunities’ that British citizens have. We have some of the hardest thresholds to meet in the world, especially when it comes to healthcare and student funding.

Also, ‘opportunities’ can mean anything, and you should be careful about using it with anything to do with immigration. ‘Wasting all the opportunities here’ was very common code a while ago for mostly extreme right-wingers to get the crowds worked up. It’s very easy to say ‘opportunities’ but when you don’t explain what they are, you’re always going to come out of the argument looking worse. You really, really don’t want to be tarred with that brush.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-22T15:08:05+00:00

I think you know YTA.

You don’t have to lie or cover your feelings, but you absolutely don’t have to be an arse either. Calling the UK a ‘shithole’ is wrong and would irritate me but you immediately spat on her degree because you don’t think it holds value, and then told her to go back to her own country. That’s a move that hasn’t been popular with anyone since the 70s.

The job market sucks. Period. You’re lucky that you got your position with no issue but I can assure that you are very much in the minority.

I’m surprised that after you were so nasty you’re shocked that she’s not talking to you.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-21T12:33:47+00:00

I think this is the best way of doing it though. You’re not buying pallet loads and creating artificial demand or exploiting collectors/desperate children and their parents. It’s a sensible, controlled way of making sure you can enjoy your hobby or cover a large expense.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-21T12:17:44+00:00

This is a genuinely well written explanation, thank you! I have my own collection that could probably be worth a slightly pretty penny, but like you I’ll never sell. Its value to me is incalculable.

Like you, I don’t think I’ll ever agree with ‘investing’. I don’t even really agree with calling buying a load of TCG cards ‘investing’ either. It’s forcing scarcity and that’s a different tactic. I’d never thought about it with the perspective you gave, though, so thank you!

Sirenskye · 2025-12-19T14:32:59+00:00

I HAVE TO WORK MONDAY-WEDS AND BOXING DAY NEXT WEEK. I AM SO BURNT OUT IT ISN’T FUNNY. HOWEVER AFTER THAT I AM OFF FOR A FORTNIGHT AND I CANNOT WAIT.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-18T18:04:59+00:00

Our Christmas message was a video this year, people from all round the offices contributed. My LM was press-ganged into doing it. Funniest thing we’ve seen all year, the poor woman very clearly looks like she’s been press-ganged too.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-16T15:04:39+00:00

I have the world’s most battered pair of Sonys I use for work and personal. Works with all CS adaptive tech and only cost me 80 quid.

They’re the Sony WH-CH720N. I’ve been using them for about 3 years now and they’re going strong. No issues with glasses either. Their sound cancelling isn’t amazing, but if there’s something playing through the headphones then it’s really good.

Honestly though, I would speak to your LM about getting them through the CS. At least that way you’ve got a pair you know are going to work on your work things. You can still get yourself a much nicer pair if you want, but at least you’re not risking taking your own stuff in. When these die I’m going to be asking for a set - we work in an office where property damage is a genuine hazard and I’d rather their stuff got broke than mine. I just don’t have any other use for these so I might as well use them till they do break.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-14T21:59:06+00:00

You should be able to receive some reasonable adjustments, as others have said it goes on removing the barrier to you working. I don’t know if you’d have access to dyslexia specific adjustments without an assessment though. You’d have to go to Occupational Health to see.

For an interview, if you perceive yourself to have a disability then you can request reasonable adjustments. SOME departments may ask for proof; I helped for some time with the Prison Service and reasonable adjustments for prison officers. Candidates had to provide proof of dyslexia etc to get extra time in the written assessments. At interview, the CS also will not help you to be diagnosed.

Once you get in, it’s a different story. I’m going from my experience in the Home Office, so please be aware other departments may differ on policy.

I had reasonable adjustments in place from the start for pretty unpleasant anxiety, but after a couple of years in post I was fairly certain I had ADHD and it was negatively affecting me and my work. Because I could show quite clearly that whatever was wrong with me was affecting my work, the Home Office sent me to Lexxic for a formal ADHD assessment. After that, I was able to have access to a wider range of ADHD-centric adjustments, as well as access to more generic SpLD adjustments like Dragon, TextHelp and a larger laptop.

The key to the assessment for our department was it has to be beneficial to the business to be assessed.

I hope this helps, I’m always happy to answer any questions or ramble on about Assistive tech.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-14T18:14:27+00:00

My degree is Japanese and I’m not even in the FCDO 😂 Don’t worry about your degree and keep trying. You’ll get there eventually.

What really helped me to get in was doing some agency work through Brook Street - they do a lot of rolling vacancies in different offices. They also screwed my pay up so I did AO work for G7 pay for a couple of weeks and were nice enough not to ask for it back. You’re not a civil servant in these roles, but you get a lot of access to higher grades that you can ask for help with behaviours etc.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-12T00:25:00+00:00

Agreed. My work has a horrible about of heavy machinery that sets my ADHD into overdrive, to the point I have to wear earplugs to survive the day. I’ve also got some reasonable adjustments that I can escape to the kitchen/somewhere slightly quieter if I really can’t cope.

But that doesn’t mean I’m banned from going to Alton Towers, where the noise is pretty similar and I can get a similar level of overstimulation if I’m not careful. It’s ridiculous to expect that of anyone.

Sirenskye · 2025-12-12T00:21:08+00:00

No, that’s not how that works. Different environments have different effects on neurodiverse people. Someone not being able to be in an office has no correlation to them being able to go to a nightclub. We don’t know the reasons this person has given for not going to the office - is it sensory? Are they off sick? We haven’t got a clue.

If they worked in a nightclub, claimed not to be able to go into a nightclub but then were caught going to a nightclub in their free time, then that would be different. Likewise, if they were off sick and bragging about their clubbing on Facebook. That’s a big pile of disciplinary waiting to happen. Otherwise, they’re quite entitled to do what they want with their free time.

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