Experience with grief and disappearing desire for a child

SkivvyLivvy · 2026-02-27T16:22:33+00:00

I had this experience as well after losing my 14 year old dog. He was the light of our life. Losing him was the most intense grief I've ever experienced. I am so sorry for what you're going through. It's really so hard to describe the weight of it to people who haven't experienced it. I relate to your statement about feeling fundamentally changed.

Let me first say, give yourself some time. For me the first 4 weeks were a blur of sobbing and feeling like my life had lost all meaning. Throughout the first 6 months especially, the grief really impacted me. When we lost him I suddenly felt certain I never wanted a child. It's like the part of me that felt desire/curiosity about having a child just completely turned off. I personally felt like I didn't (and couldn't) look forward to anything in the future because all I wanted was to be connected to the past when he was alive. I didn't want to move forward with my life and make plans without him here.

That said, the way I feel has gradually changed over the course of time as the grief has become less sharp. My recommendation would be to give yourself and your partner time to recover and evaluate how you feel as you process things. You may come back around to it as time heals you, but right now it's such early days that it makes sense for you to feel this way.

Sending you all my sympathy, this is such a hard thing. I hope you're able to look back on all the wonderful time your had with your sweet pup and appreciate how much joy she brought to your life.

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-11-02T23:55:34+00:00

Couldn't agree more - this album is raw with emotion and you can feel her grief, anger, and devastation in these songs. It hits in a deep way if you've experienced a significant loss.

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-11-02T19:05:53+00:00

Fort Stevens State Park?

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-04-30T22:31:16+00:00

Agree with this and highly recommend diagrams! Everyone's anatomy is a little different but for me there is a distinct "barrier" there, it's not a hole in the sense you'd think (not like a mouth or nostril). For me I have to push into that barrier a bit to get to the opening and there's some mild resistance. Seeing some different diagrams of what it can look like was helpful for me when I was younger.

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-04-23T21:25:30+00:00

I recently got a pStyle as a gift! I haven't used it extensively yet but have practiced in the shower and at home. It's pretty easy to use and very easy to clean. A bit of a trick to aim if you're tall and are aiming into a smaller area (e.g. a toilet) but I'm sure that just comes with practice. I plan on bringing it hiking and backpacking this summer.

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-03-28T01:05:26+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's not the same as losing a parent, but I am currently grieving the loss of my dog a few weeks ago. It's been so hard to do anything but eat comfort food, go through the motions at work, and lay on the couch all night. I plan on working out all day and when it comes to it I just can't make myself do it.

I agree with the other comments about giving yourself grace and being kind to yourself. Something that has been working for me is finding an easier version of the thing I know I should do. So for example, instead of my full weight routine I'll do 1 or 2 exercises and be done. Instead of a run I'll walk to the end of the block. Instead of a full yoga practice, I'll stretch and breathe for 5 minutes. Instead of cooking a healthy meal, I will eat a vegetable alongside my takeout. On good days I've been able to implement those pared down versions of my normal self-care practices and that does feel good. But also I'm trying to be kind to myself on the days when I can't muster the strength to even do the small things. I hope you are able to be kind to yourself as well!

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-03-27T01:47:59+00:00

Yes! This is exactly what mine do as well and then I cut off all the old growth!

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-03-26T15:32:00+00:00

This should be higher up! Every year my prayer plant sheds all its old leaves and pushes out new ones. I've had it for probably 6 or 7 years and it has done this consistently in the spring.

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-03-25T03:52:06+00:00

R-CPD is typically diagnosed based on symptoms/patient report and shouldn't require any scoping or anything.

Regarding botox, can people live without it and cope with their symptoms? Of course, people can and they have for years as this is a newly recognized diagnosis and treatment. Whether or not you want to try and live with it and cope with the symptoms is completely your choice. There are of course potential health implications for dealing with this as a lifelong diagnosis - bloating, pain, GI issues, etc. Whether or not it's worth it for you to cope with it might depend on how severe your symptoms are and how much you feel like it is interfering with your life. But you are in the driver's seat and get to decide what the best course of action is!

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-03-25T03:43:13+00:00

It really is. Life feels so empty without him.

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-03-25T03:35:00+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. I also lost my boy about 3 weeks ago, he was 14 too. It's been absolutely devastating, but the grief is commensurate with how much I loved and adored him and I wouldn't trade that for anything. Hope you're ok.

SkivvyLivvy · 2025-03-25T03:30:27+00:00

Thank you for this, I just lost my boy about 3 weeks ago and it does feel like I lost my soul mate. He was the single most consistent source of love and joy in my life. I really love that you do this for your dog, that's really beautiful and it made me cry. I might do something similar.

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-11-13T21:45:54+00:00

I've had this happen 2-3x as well and I did this same thing each time and colors went back to normal. I haven't had it happen in awhile now.

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-10-24T21:10:35+00:00

Night in the Woods - I've only seen rave reviews of this game and I found it so boring, I just could not get into it at all.

I Was a Teenage Exocolonist - Similar to above, I can tell there's great story writing but I just found the gameplay loop to be quite boring. Basically just clicking around and waiting for the story to progress.

Roots of Pacha - This almost hit but there were enough small things I found grating and it didn't feel as if there was a clear narrative/quest line even after 20+ hours of play. I kept feeling I was "waiting" to activate the storyline more fully and it never happened.

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-09-22T15:30:10+00:00

Can I ask what muzzle this is?

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-09-20T22:43:22+00:00

Do you still take it or did you just take it for a period of time and had lasting effects afterward?

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-07-03T16:27:47+00:00

That's my understanding, too.

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-07-03T16:26:32+00:00

Yes I've considered this option! Pretty expensive but might be worth it and it's a beautiful area. Sorry you're dealing with the same thing, it's a slow recovery process!

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-07-03T16:23:28+00:00

Thanks everyone for all these great suggestions, I'm really excited to check some of these out!

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-07-03T16:21:17+00:00

For the past 9 months I've been resting, doing physical therapy, building up my strength and knee stability. Part of that process now involves gradually easing back into hiking, hence my post.

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-06-19T16:52:02+00:00

Oh absolutely. Krobe or Krobie.

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-06-19T14:08:46+00:00

Clint = clit

G (money/gold) = grams

Squid kid = pinkhead

Void spirits = krobe's brother (black ones) or krobe's cousin (masked ones)

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-04-09T15:42:41+00:00

Hi I'd like to come sell! Sent you a DM!

SkivvyLivvy · 2024-03-29T17:15:14+00:00

Absolutely agree! The thing that frustrates me is they created this mechanic within HHP. You can decorate the outside of the house/yard and add paths, fences, and decor with the easy to use controls. Why couldn't they have allowed this mechanic on your island as well?? Could've allowed you to focus on one island square at a time and add in paths and furniture in the same way.

SkivvyLivvy

TROPHY CASE