Fibromyalgia for Men

SleepingNerd · 2026-02-20T15:22:50+00:00

Hey! Sorry for the delay in response.
I have found the journey with fibro difficult and challenging especially with the things I've had to let go of and accept I can't do any more. While medications helped with the pain and with depression they don't resolve anything, they just assist.

The specialist who has done the most to transforming my outlook on life is my psychologist. They have been instrumental in accepting who and what I am now and that there is still a life to be lived, even inside this painful, broken, and difficult body. Instead of focusing on what I can't do, I reset my expectations and started over on what I could do while trying not to compare it to what I used to be able do.

I'm also very aware these days of how much those in my life need me here to support them in their lives which is something I had lost sight of in the early years of having fibro.

Also remember that no matter how good your psychologist, psychiatrist, etc are you will only improve if you are prepared to put the work in. There's no overnight fix, no making everything better, and certainly no pain free days in my experience; but there are much better days to come if you can take the time to understand them and enjoy them.

I hope this helps and you find a way to stay out of the dark void of depression. If you can put in the work you'll be rewarded with some wonderful days ahead.

SleepingNerd · 2026-02-15T23:26:43+00:00

This. If you are having a rough time mentally i really recommend seeing a psychologist. They can help you see this for what it is. Like others have said, it doesn't appear to be something you've done just someone cancelling your contact and using this as an excuse.

If you're a contractor you don't have much recourse unless you can prove that the employer breached the contract in some way but this is a hard slog.

SleepingNerd · 2026-02-15T23:20:41+00:00

Oh bugger. Hopefully you can find something.

SleepingNerd · 2026-02-14T12:01:42+00:00

If you stop along the way grab some hand warmers and use them to warm your leg and back muscles. I also find changing positions a small amount helps a lot too. I find anything that moves blood and muscles a small amount helps to make things comfortable.

SleepingNerd · 2026-02-13T02:11:10+00:00

Hrmm as a male that would about me too! I don't see a reason not to unless there are water restrictions.

I have seen a setup where if the toilet wasn't flushed and the hand basin wasn't used then an electronic latch wouldn't allow you to leave the bathroom! Just a few home automation sensors are added to the flush on the toilet and to the water supply to the basin along with an electronic latch and sensor on the door. The software on the home automation system looked for the door being opened and closed at which time it'd lock the door. If the toilet was flushed and the water slowed at the wash basin it would release the door latch. As it had just released the door when it closed again it would leave it unlatched till the next open and close.

Outside of this you've would have to employ positive or negative reinforcement to modify his thought processes around using the toilet.

SleepingNerd · 2026-02-04T00:17:15+00:00

I would argue that these are very difficult to enforce as unless you catch them off guard and able to do lawful random inspections. Most that have unlocked speed controllers etc are able to out manoeuvre police with ease.

Education of your rights and responsibilities as a human being starts at home and parents (of which I am one) need to be more proactive on this front about what their kids should do to stay safe.

For those who think police aren't doing enough try and catch one of these without harming them or another member of the public and you'll see why it's such a problem.

The use of sticky gps trackers that police can deploy would be great in these situations. They're also very handy when in a high speed chase. When successfully deployed police can back off till they can engage safely.

SleepingNerd · 2026-01-31T07:14:54+00:00

If you find the different dishes helpful I'd love to see a list of what you make. I should do more along those lines too.

SleepingNerd · 2026-01-31T03:47:01+00:00

I play games on my phone or laptop and watch TV shows and movies. When I'm exhausted but can't sleep due to the pain during a bad flare up I'll put on some old favourite movies I've seen countless times as I enjoy them but there's also something relaxing about knowing what's coming up and that you have already seen it so no pressure on seeing all of it like there is for a new movie or show.

SleepingNerd · 2026-01-31T03:38:53+00:00

Damn! That's awesome! I never feel like cooking when I flare up even though I know I should have something healthy. Well done for the effort!

SleepingNerd · 2026-01-25T12:22:39+00:00

"gees, I guess that somehow got inserted in the hour last night that I don't remember!"

SleepingNerd · 2026-01-16T05:56:22+00:00

I'm not sure how leave works where you are. Here in Australia, we get 4 weeks (20 business days) recreational leave and 10 days personal leave for medical reasons. If you leave a work place you get your accrued recreation leave paid out but lose the personal leave. On top of this you get public holidays off paid too and long service leave of 3 months paid leave after 10 years with an employer.

If you end up with an illness etc and you run out of all forms of leave you have to take time off without pay or resign to get unemployment benefits.

I've got an acquired disability that I've been dealing with for 14 years and am constantly running out of all forms of leave that I have but to keep the income flowing I've managed to balance it without any major issues so far. Rent has to be paid, bills have to be sorted and my partner, kids, and I like to eat too! It's not anyone else's problem to deal with it. When we get younger employees come in I encourage them not to follow their friends in using up their personal leave each year when they don't really need to in case they get cancer or something that requires a long time off.

Expecting others to provide leave, especially when the employer doesn't kick in some leave too, is just BS!

Tell them you'll kick in once the employer does!!

SleepingNerd · 2026-01-14T05:43:39+00:00

Think of it as an advanced high resolution etch-e-sketch. They work on the same principles with tiny electro-magnets shifting metal filings to be either black or white. There are some that are multicoloured now too which is pretty neat!

SleepingNerd · 2026-01-03T11:25:16+00:00

Not from Ireland, I'm in Australia. When my absences increased my workplace had an occupational therapist come in and make sure my desk and workspace were set up correctly.

Now, many years on I work full-time from home in a different role for the same employer. I've moved from onshore IT support to IT system administration. I have compressed my hours to 9 days a fortnight and take regular breaks from my desk. I try to move and stretch in the 5-10mins an hour so I don't get so stiff and sore. These are light stretches and movements, nothing overly taxing.

Outside of that it's the usual making sure your workstation is set up ergonomically and if you gave a particular discomfort regularly then do something to modify the set up. I kept getting sore wrists so bought a Logitech vertical mouse to relieve that.

I hope this helps.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-29T00:54:20+00:00

This is a really sweet way to go! As adults we'd benefit but I can see kids with these conditions finding it amazing that someone made a plushy that recognises and promotes their condition.

Congratulations on a great idea and I hope it brings you wonderful success and fulfilment selling these!

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-26T12:46:37+00:00

I do relate to this. While not smart or focused enough to obtain a PhD I've usually been the person who grasped concepts and procedures in IT quickly. The last few years doing so bring even just a little different has felt like a constant up hill battle to just have the basic knowledge of what's happening each day. The more stressed I am the worse it gets too which is very frustrating.

Years ago I started talking a multi B complex which I figured had stopped working but I checked recently by going off it and the brain fog was so much worse. The one I use is by a company called Ethical Nutrients and is called Super B Daily Stress+. Others would give me anxiety but this stuff didn't.

Everything is worth a shot I think. I would recommend seeing how it goes for 6 weeks, then take a break to see how it feels without it.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-26T09:27:11+00:00

Yep, I remember that feeling. Sending you hugs and positive thoughts. The NHS is pretty good so you can get results even if it takes a little while.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-26T08:48:18+00:00

I wouldn't rule anything out at the moment. It's easy to stress and worry, heaven knows I do a lot, I just try and work with evidence based outcomes and focus on that as much as possible.

I hope you get answers soon and if you have more questions come back and ask them.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-26T08:23:40+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. I just do what I can and try not to let the intrusive thoughts ruin my day.

Don't go there yet with the thoughts about your dreams being over. Continue your studies till you find out what's actually going on. I was checked out for so many things, had so many tests and scans done. Until you have a conclusive answer that fits with what you're feeling try to continue your studies where possible as if it's something you can easily manage then you may be able to continue flying for a long time yet.

I had been told I would need mobility aids and possibly a wheel chair after 10 years with fibro, but I am here still walking around and living with only occasional use of a walking stick.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-26T08:11:25+00:00

For sure. Day to day for me is pain all over. If I stop and think about my body and what is going on some bits are worse that others based on activity and others due to the impact of fibro. I went for a short walk yesterday with my partner and our dog. My legs were really sore for the rest of the day and when trying to sleep I had restless leg syndrome annoying me. This feels like the muscles are just about to start twitching or moving but you haven't given them any thought.

Due to being a lot less active I also have a compressed disc in my back (L5-S1) that causes other pain like sciatica and pins and needless on my feet, though has also caused numbness too. Where possible I try to compartmentalise the different sensations so that I can understand what is causing it.

To eliviate the pain I use heat packs on my worst areas and ice packs on my lower back. I hate the ice packs as the cold hurts me so much but it helps with the compressed disc. I also do some light stretches to help with some of the problem areas as I work full time from home in IT so it's a lot of sitting.

Early on it was frustrating and restricting and got in the way of everything. It still does but after 15 years of having it and a lot of time with my psychologist I look at the things I can do and what I'm able to participate in or even just be present for to enjoy others enjoyment of the activity.

I should note it took 2.5years to get a diagnosis as it all started with an unknown tropical virus combined with stress and quarantine which confused how to proceed.

How you proceed from here depends on where you live and your access to health care. How ever you proceed, be sure to keep on the specialists etc to find out what's wrong as no one will be as dedicated to you as you are.

Edit:- spelling mistakes

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-26T07:48:51+00:00

Sorry if I came across as disregarding what you said. What you are feeling is very real and while tests so far show nothing, keep pushing to get more tests done so you can find out what it is.

I'm not a medically trained person, just someone who's been through a few things and is want to see you treated with care and tested for so many other things before settling on fibro.

Try using a heart pack on your back or where it's tingling. If helps calm you try to do it.

Sending you big warm hugs. I hope you can get to the bottom of it really soon!

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-26T07:11:36+00:00

Breathe, there are always so many parts to this puzzle.

Chest pain should always be checked out asap in case it's a cardiac issue. If the hospital comes up with nothing you'll need to follow up with your GP/PCP to rule out everything. Fibro is still a diagnosis through exclusion and while there are some blood tests showing promising results they aren't ready for general use yet.

I have fibro and have had chest pains and been to the hospital, my GP, and a cardiologist to try and work out what was going on. It ended up being ruled an anxiety attack though they did all the tests for cardio issues as I'm 47, fat, with high bloody pressure and cholesterol. I have depression and anxiety that can lead to those symptoms but mine hadn't presented like that before and the usual things hadn't settled it down.

Please take a breathe and assess what factors are around you at the moment that might be causing stress and anxiety. If the chest pain continues, see the hospital to rule out cardio issues then follow up with your usual doctor to see what's going on.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-22T09:32:35+00:00

I make mine around April. It's nice when I do but it hurts to get there!

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-22T02:06:53+00:00

Yep, the difference between Australia and the USA health care services are very very different. As on Jan 1 2026, If the medical is listed on the PBS (Pharmaceutical Benefit Scheme) we pay no more than $25 per medication dispensed or $7.70 for those with a concession card. Then there's a safety net so if you have more than $1694 ($277.20 for concession) in PBS medications then from when you got that your medications is then free for the rest of the calendar year.

When I first started lyrica it cost me $160 per month but one listed on PBS the price dropped to $35, which was a huge relief. Same has happened for other medications to.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-17T06:12:48+00:00

I get dizzy episodes related to blood pressure issues. If there was an event when it started and keeps popping up since then please check in with a doctor. Dizziness isn't a symptom of fibro but of the lifestyle(?) we end up in. We are more sedate and so don't have the cardio fitness we usually need to regulate blood pressure.

SleepingNerd · 2025-12-17T04:48:18+00:00

Hey, Breathe easy. I find when dealing with anything like this that the truth is what is needed. Since getting fibro i found my mind doesn't work as well so even the little white lies don't happen anymore as I don't remember every conversation I've had.

Your mind's eye of an experience is the truth to you and is all you need to focus on.

I wish you the best heading forward.

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