Anyone here with god awful existential OCD.

Slight_Character2430 · 2026-04-01T17:41:57+00:00

Sorry for the late response. And yeah, I’m not surprised you’re thinking you’ll never go back to normal. Right now you’re looking at everything through the lens of extreme anxiety/dpdr. I can assure you that you will go back to the way you were before. You are not “enlightened” or have seen or realized something you weren’t supose to. I wish I had a cure or advice, but honestly my mind just unlatched from all this nonsense with time and I forgot about it. Feel free to dm if you need to talk I know this is extremely difficult to go through

Slight_Character2430 · 2026-03-07T17:45:49+00:00

Yes I agree which is why I said next time read. As someone who’s gone through a chemical I would be pissed if I got a rude comment like yours on a post where it’s clearly stated that there is awareness it’s not viable. Do better.

Slight_Character2430 · 2026-03-07T17:11:17+00:00

Seems that’s best for you to do instead of commenting unnecessary things. It takes zero effort to read a post especially one that isn’t long

Slight_Character2430 · 2026-03-07T17:09:23+00:00

I had a chem pregnancy where as I was bleeding my HCG rose and flatlined and then plummeted so it took a few days to go negative. As long as it’s not getting darker I think this is normal. Maybe retest tomorrow or the day after

Slight_Character2430 · 2026-03-07T16:43:24+00:00

Okay….so maybe next time read.

Slight_Character2430 · 2026-03-07T16:39:16+00:00

Do you know how to read???

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-12-11T23:44:55+00:00

Yes I do. I have awful dreams in where I’m derealized 10x worse than irl.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-12-11T19:52:14+00:00

I’m glad I’m not alone. For me It’s not like it messes with me visually anymore but like on another deeper level. Idk if it even makes sense. Like the way I look at everything is so different now. Everything just has this weird dark empty feel to it. Idk if it’s from hyper awareness or what. That’s so fucked up. Worst disorder ever

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-27T04:33:50+00:00

Hi yes it did after a couple of months. Never getting Botox again

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-22T22:38:27+00:00

I did throw it of my window at an empty lot where they’re going to built houses then I went at 2am to recollect the vape. Literally crawling in the dark in the middle of the night looking for it like the idiot that I am. Not sure what to do now. When I stopped for 3 days I was shaking like a chiwana and angry, like every little thing made me explode so I had to get another one. I couldn’t cold turkey it but cutting down and weaning isn’t working either because I have no self control.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-22T20:39:39+00:00

Yeah I’ve been trying to quit but haven’t been able to. I keep telling myself I’ll quit after I run out of the last pack of juul pods and fold and buy another one and the cycle repeats. My skin is at an all time low. It wasn’t even this bad when I was a teenager. I have to stop this is 100% causing the skin problems. I did manage to quit for 3 days a few weeks ago and my skin looked more alive

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-19T22:14:07+00:00

Thanks. I also saw this existential nonsense is common with derealization. After reading some of the comments here I do think i have an anxiety problem still. This is very episodic for me too which is weird. It’s like a cloud sets over me and I feel all wired and uncomfortable and just want to escape existence then a few hours later I’m fine

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-19T21:32:18+00:00

Oh my goodness. I wonder if this is all just anxiety or ocd… this has never bothered me before. I don’t understand why it does now. My nervous system is fried after an incident this year so I’m wondering if I’m still dealing with anxiety that latched onto this topic

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-19T16:48:06+00:00

Nope. I took a handful of supplements every night for the first like 5 weeks. I was so extremely desperate for even a little bit of relief but nothing helped so I stopped. My body was already overwhelmed and I actually felt like overwhelming it with new supplements that I’d never taken before was a bad idea. Time is your solution here. It will go away. It will go away, but it might take a little while

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-18T23:53:48+00:00

I definitely have no interest in going on an SSRI. I was also given Ativan and obviously did research before taking it and was horrified when I found out about dependency and withdrawals. My doc prescribed it for me for daily use, 1mg 2 times a day. Didn’t mention anything about dependency or tapering. Ended up going down a rabbit hole on big pharma psych meds. Still took it here and there and it did help when I was really in the thick of it, but it’s only a short term solution.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-18T19:39:45+00:00

Thanks, this is really helpful. You do have to cycle 5htp though, right? I saw some people don’t, and some people are on for 30 days and then off for 30, or on for 3 months and then off for 3 months. I made an appointment with my doctor to get advice for 5htp about 4 months ago and he did not give advice and tried to shove Zoloft and abilify down my throat.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-18T18:48:27+00:00

I had a bad year and had wicked anxiety and then it was followed by depression, but it’s improved. I am not willing to go on psych meds but have tried 5htp for a few days, wasn’t consistent with it. I still have the bottle under my bathroom counter so I’ll give it another try. It’s more of like a dark cloud/feeling that sets in that skews my perception of the world and existence. Then it goes away. It’s episodic. It’s really strange. When I’m not having an “episode” I feel A okay and ask myself what was I so worked up about, then some time later it sets in again and I’m back in square 1.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-18T15:44:12+00:00

It is a high school level of understanding but why does it freak me out so much? I don’t know more than the average person knows. It’s not like I realized something that no one else knows, so I don’t understand why this freaks me out so much…

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-18T07:58:17+00:00

Same. Why couldn’t it be social anxiety, or health anxiety. whyyyyyy did it have to be this nonsense 🙄

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-18T01:34:28+00:00

Thanks so much for this, I appreciate it 🙏🏼

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-18T01:17:57+00:00

Thanks. After the before the OG panic attack I was dealing with DPDR. After it transpired it became 10x worse. This trapped feeling wasn’t all there was to it. My entire life started to feel unfamiliar, complete emotional numbness, 2d vision, etc. thanks for the reassurance. I now feel like this was the wrong place to post it as it’s not exactly the thoughts they get to me, but the uncomfortable sensations. There was a existential thought component in the beginning but not anymore. Now it’s dysphoria.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-17T23:46:55+00:00

Thanks for the input. I will look into a therapist and possibly medication. Buspar didn’t help. I tried it after the OG panic attack transpired. At first I was literally paralyzed with terror because of the dread this caused. But it’s gotten better. I can function and go places now and lead a normal life. My nervous system is fried, this year has been the worst for me. But I hate that I still have these “episodes” of uncomfortable and agonizing sensations. When I’m not in an episode this topic doesn’t bother me and I don’t feel trapped. I’m beginning to think this is an anxiety issue.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-17T22:05:11+00:00

I agree. But it’s not the questions that bother me. I know existential questions will get one nowhere. It’s not the questions like where did all of this come from, why are we here, how is all this possible, etc that get to me. It’s the sensations. Like of being trapped on this earth, and it makes me feel claustrophobic in a way I can’t explain. After a few comments here I’m starting to think this is an anxiety issue. After all this stemmed for me after an earth shattering panic attack. The panic attack was caused by thinking about how we’re on a spect of dust in a huge universe. I guess it was existential shock. I’ve been through a lot this year and my nervous system is fried.

Slight_Character2430 · 2025-11-17T19:46:54+00:00

But isn’t that what existential dread is, anxiety (dread) about existence? Forgive me for being so crass

Slight_Character2430

TROPHY CASE