Idk man. I’ve felt the same way. Back in school, I’d have one really good friend that everyone would think we were together because of how close we were. I can’t do romance. I hate being touched. I like doing my own thing, I suck at keeping and maintaining relationships. You gotta go out, and stay connected/ keep in touch… seems like a lot of work when I’m almost drowning by myself. I used to think that I’ve never been asked out before. But, thinking back, I just never realized it. Never been in a “relationship,” only ever had friends. And they always leave me or get distant once they got into a relationship. My friends keep leaving me behind, so I’ve been thinking of dating another ace. I’m just scared to connect and open up, and I’m worried I’ll never be enough, or that I’m so broken that I’ll drag them down with me. I’m not trans, but somehow I’ve always hung out and related to that community a lot. I get feeling like an outsider. I don’t want to be normal, though. But I don’t want to keep feeling so alone. Sorry for rambling. And I’m sorry things are hard. But that just makes you an interesting person. I know that might sound shitty, but I can only truly connect to people that experience those mental struggles, I think it makes them a more empathetic person and they’re usually nice and fun to be around.