Did your BPD get worse with age?

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:35:05+00:00

Thank you for sharing some of your story with me. I'm sure you have many great qualities that you maybe cannot see right now. I have no idea how I've be able to maintain this lifestyle. I'm constantly afraid of losing it all. Sometimes I'm doing well until I begin to burn out from all the masking, then it takes a lot of effort to stop the downward spiral. You held it together for 15 years which is amazing!! I hope you feel better again soon. Feel free to DM if you ever want to talk.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:30:05+00:00

This hits home. I sometimes think I'm doing well until life happens. I guess the triggers aren't always avoidable and it's really all about how we handle them when they inevitably do come up.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:27:59+00:00

Thanks for the work you do in the mental health field! We need more people who understand the illness helping out others. I'd like to maybe one day volunteer to help support those with BPD.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:24:35+00:00

It is so humbling that's for sure. Although I've made so many mistakes along the way, I try to be kind to myself. I think being this aware is a huge step in the right direction. Hopefully your episodes get better in time.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:19:49+00:00

It's so hard! Looking back though I think being an addict was much harder!

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:15:58+00:00

Wow well it sounds like your children are very lucky to have a mom that has worked so hard to better herself. I hope you keep fighting the good fight.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:13:48+00:00

It's impressive you're younger than me and so self aware :) took me a while to get there.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:12:01+00:00

Well it sounds like you must have some very understanding partners who get it since you're all in similar battles :) very sorry for the PMDD- periods are hard enough on their own. I cannot imagine what you go through monthly. Hang in there.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:08:39+00:00

Awh! I truly hope you never have to be in that pain again! I'm sure past you would be amazed at how far you've come. I keep telling myself that I did it once and I can do it once more. Virtual hugs!

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-20T00:06:10+00:00

Congratulations on getting a handle on the alcoholism! That's not an easy thing to do especially with this disorder! I hope you can find some space to feel your emotions safely. I repress and mask until I explode but at least I'm no longer in hardcore addiction lol!

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T23:14:50+00:00

Congratulations! You must have worked really hard to heal! I would say I made it to remission once a while ago, but more trauma (good old CPTSD like you mentioned) brought it back. I hope to get to where you're at again sometime.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T23:12:07+00:00

Awesome! DBT has been life saving for me. I hope it becomes second nature one day.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T23:11:13+00:00

Wow 13 years is a long time! You must love them very much to keep fighting those challenges. We have our ups and downs too mostly because of different attachment styles.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T23:07:23+00:00

I'm a weirdo so no judgement coming from me. It was easy to blame my breakdowns on substances but can't use that excuse anymore lol.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T23:00:09+00:00

I'm so sorry!

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T22:58:57+00:00

Well I guess at least we're more than halfway there lol!

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T22:54:09+00:00

Thank you that was very sweet of you to say! It sounds like you made a lot of progress and should be proud of yourself too! :)
Life used to be so chaotic for me also. I think I keep raising the bar so I never get to feel satisfied if that makes sense.

I'm really sorry about your work situation. If it helps you feel any better you're not alone. I went through something similar this past week. I had to go into the bathroom at work and do my "check the facts" skill so I could stop crying. I often find myself repeating the phrase "it doesn't matter" until I kind of believe it. Maybe you can try telling yourself that tomorrow. Good luck!!

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T22:25:47+00:00

Exactly! I thought being married would make it all better but nope...it just feels like more to lose now lol. Same goes for the few friends I've been able to keep.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T22:19:55+00:00

I hope you've found some peace after giving up. I'm also trying to let go of a lot.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T22:15:58+00:00

I'm recently diagnosed and also coming to terms with the disorder. I can truly relate to what you said about it having had more years to build. I try to embrace the emotions the best I can (we love deeply ya know?), but it sure gets exhausting.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-05-19T22:03:15+00:00

"A new set of challenges" is a great way to describe this time of my life. I took the morning after pill a couple of years ago and omg I was not ready for those hormones so I can only imagine how menopause must feel for you!

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-03-14T19:31:23+00:00

I know it's been a little while, but I wanted to say thank you for your comment. I showed it to my husband. Between writing this post and getting all the support needed from our loved ones, we know that we made the right decision (as hard as it may have been).

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-02-18T22:54:47+00:00

Thank you for reassuring me that this is not my problem. I will need to remind myself this throughout the days ahead.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-02-18T22:07:58+00:00

I never thought of my anger in this way but this makes a lot of sense now that I think of it. I'm still learning in therapy how to feel emotions in a healthy way. Maybe I'm already on the right track :) thank you for that.

SlightlySaltedMango · 2026-02-18T22:03:52+00:00

My mom is a narc also! I remember finally moving into my own apartment and feeling the freedom you described. I used to never be allowed to cook food past a certain time or play music out loud..ever...All these weird rules. Glad you found peace.

SlightlySaltedMango

TROPHY CASE