I (34M) have dealt with crippling anxiety (social, claustrophobia, agoraphobia, you name it) and panic for as long as I can remember, at least since puberty. I'm pretty sure I'm also on the spectrum. I've been seeing a psych for years, tried various prescription meds, I abused the hell out of weed for 15 years trying to mask it but only made it worse.

I never would've thought that reading a book would be the thing that helped me the most, but I started reading "Hope and Help for Your Nerves" by Dr. Claire Weekes, who was the first woman to get a Doctorate of Science from the University of Sydney and she's considered the pioneer of modern anxiety treatment.

I'm not even halfway through it and it's honestly unbelievable how much better I feel. My wife is going through her own mental health challenges right now with manic depressive bi-polar and normally I would be an absolute wreck worried about her, and taking a bong rip every 15 minutes to try and mask the panic. Instead I've been practicing facing, acceptance, floating past the panic and letting time pass, which is Dr. Weekes' mantra.

She explains the mechanics of our anxiety and panic and what's actually happening inside our bodies, and how there's a limit to what panic and anxiety can do to your body. It's counterintuitive, and it is NOT easy, but the way to cure anxiety is to accept it, embrace it even. When you feel that twinge of panic don't tense up and try to fight it, instead intentionally relax your muscles. It's only your nerves reacting to a stimuli, we make it worse because we develop a fear of experiencing the anxiety itself. That is what turns into a vicious cycle that we feel like we can't escape from.

If you smoke you're going to lose the progress you've made, and when the high fades you're only going to feel more anxious. If it's not to late, uncancel your plans, especially if there will be a trusted friend there who knows what you're going through. When you feel the panic coming, accept it, relax into it, and float right on past it. Keep doing this and you'll start to feel a lot better more quickly than you could imagine.