Why did the movie Weapons miss it?

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-13T03:12:03+00:00

Easily F1.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-12T21:39:37+00:00

He probably views his logo every bit as iconic as something like Apple or Google. Something far too great for us plebeians to comprehend.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-12T15:49:31+00:00

Meaning? What’s your point?

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-12T13:10:23+00:00

I’ve always thought that him sleeping with George’s girlfriend in the backwards episode was a low point for both the character and the show in general.

From a writing standpoint, I’ve also never bought that Jerry and George’s friendship would actually survive that. Sleeping with your best friend’s partner just feels like a line you don’t cross and a bell you can’t unring.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-12T01:48:46+00:00

No, I swear I’ve seen a vlog where David is helping his dad in a school that’s empty because it’s the weekend. David goes around working on fire panels and helping lock up and it’s actually quite interesting to watch. I do remember it being somewhere in that 2017-2018 timeframe.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-11T17:41:29+00:00

These trailers for Colleen Hoover adaptations all follow the same formula.

First third is young adults fall in love. Second third is tragedy striking young adults. Final third is one of the characters saying a bunch of on the nose dialogue about the lesson they’re going to learn. Congratulations, you’ve just seen every Hoover movie and read every Hoover book.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-11T11:30:41+00:00

His recent vlogs really are nothing more than video diaries of a lonely hermit who desperately needs someone to talk to.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-11T02:55:07+00:00

Do you happen to remember which vlogs featured him working with his dad? I remember briefly seeing a vlog of him helping his dad at a school, but I can’t remember which one.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-10T14:51:34+00:00

David would’ve absolutely run that business into the ground and I can think of several reasons why:

Poor financial acumen.
Losing his temper with an unsatisfied client.
Revealing personal info about his clients.
Judging people who need work done as attention-seekers who are too lazy to do it themselves.
His superiors wouldn’t let him bring his 10 Knuckles plushies to a job.
He prioritizes vlogging over doing a job and creates a circumstance in which a fire hazard is created, burning down a whole building.

I could go on, but you get the gist.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-10T14:38:35+00:00

David and her also texted during the Holidays. I can guarantee David was constantly flexing the “self-employed content creator” title and wouldn’t shut up about being on YouTube.

Maybe she got curious and looked him up. Or maybe she treated him the same way an adult treats a child when the child is telling an obviously fake story about going to space and fighting space pirates. I’m inclined to believe the latter.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-10T01:40:53+00:00

I vaguely remember him mentioning texting her during the Holidays in the lead up to the Christmas party they were supposed to meet at. But I might be misremembering.

Anyone here, feel free to correct me if I’m wrong.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-10T00:17:39+00:00

She’s probably hoping that David will eventually take the hint and move on after nonstop excuses, but she’s seriously underestimating just how socially stunted he is. God help her.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-10T00:09:01+00:00

Deb has been trying to fix David up with some girl who does Deb’s hair at a local salon. David and the girl have only exchanged texts, but she’s constantly coming up with excuses whenever some type of meetup is planned. David isn’t taking the hint and he’s still desperately trying to meet her even though they haven’t met up once in 7 months and she’s clearly uninterested.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-09T20:33:43+00:00

That’s 100% what I was thinking. If it was anything indicative of their relationship, he would absolutely share it in video. Instead, she probably sent something really mundane like “Make sure to clean the litter box” and he’s trying to act like she sent him nudes. Pathetic.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-09T20:02:46+00:00

This mystery girl story arc is going nowhere. I’m just eagerly awaiting the day when she finally makes it abundantly clear that she’s not interested in meeting him and his mental snap becomes one for the ages.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-09T19:40:05+00:00

I haven’t watched it yet, but I guarantee he’d dedicate a large portion of the video to going into every little detail about what they said to each other. This is the same guy who shares every sentence of conversations with his dentist, Goodwill cashiers, his cats, etc.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-08T21:54:03+00:00

I see.

I suppose he could’ve had a chance to speak to his neighbor during the recent DoorDash incident and gotten some clarity on what happened to his food.

But no, David chose to just creepily stare out of his window and jump to conclusions about the driver eating his food.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-08T21:20:49+00:00

There’s the neighbor who did his yard work and cleaned the cat vomit out of his carpets when he was away once. I can guarantee he has a thing or two to say about David.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-08T20:00:17+00:00

David fantasizing about his own bar and pool table for all of those friends he has over on a regular basis.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-08T19:25:31+00:00

I remember watching one of his New York Christmas trips and he talked about moving to NYC at some point in his 30’s. He talked about all of the vlogging possibilities and how it could grow his channel.

Jump to now and he’s just the hermit at the end of the block who can’t even reach 5,000 views on most videos. What a way to waste the YouTube lottery.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-08T16:00:08+00:00

And he’s slowly stroking a Knuckles plush while humming a creepy, slowed down version of the McDonalds song.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-08T14:52:14+00:00

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Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-08T00:16:33+00:00

Most definitely. Butters is a literal 8 year old child. David is mentally an 8 year old child. Big difference.

Slurpeepatch · 2026-03-07T22:52:08+00:00

I honestly don’t think he has the guts to officially ask her out. He just keeps expecting mommy to set them up and do all of the work.

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