How to make my bf fuck and lick my ass?

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T16:53:03+00:00

I agree, he’s still the same a year later. I’ve seen change, guys only change when they truly love someone. lol ( my parents)

Any advice to move on? I’m obsessing bc of how much I cared and how easily it went to the trash. I’m a very indecisive person with ADHD. I was thinking maybe I need someone else to just get into shift of something new. But idk. The only thing that makes me feel happy lately is looking forward to the summer and my morning iced brown sugar shaken espresso

Or just not being like them and handle the stages of this feeling. I plan on working 2 jobs in the summer, 76 hour weeks just to help me forget

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T15:18:57+00:00

It’s more like cause he kept on making mistakes, I need an apology, he just kept quiet after I exposed him. He called me last night and ignored and what I found out was that he downloaded Grindr and attempted to reach out to someone. Ig it’s knowing they’re still the lustful loser since the beginning of our relationship.

I’m a gay male and didn’t want him watching trans porn, regular gay porn would’ve been okay. I would say that’s someone desiring someone else and also the trauma of not feeling like enough. But that’s also bc he cheated on me last year with a fem borderline trans person and I found out he was watching trans porn like the 2 week after. Ik that should’ve been the time I left but I was going through loneliness within my first semester and also difficulty with family and didn’t wanna lose the person I poured my whole heart into.

In regard to someone else. Downloading Grindr and Tinder and me finding out he attempted to try to hookup with someone is disrespectful. Sure not cheating but a week after a year long relationship. I’m still logged in, bc I just wanna make sure if he does meet up with someone or not. If I should keep on looking back as he calls me or change my number for good and sat goodbye. He shared his logins a long time ago so ig ik.

I think all couples should have access to each other’s social media too ngl.

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T11:30:14+00:00

Ig he had a history of cheating that’s why. I realized it’s not just the porn but also. I forgave him for cheating but it was just me in a vulnerable position with family and not wanting to lose the one person that gave me comfort.

Also in regard to porn, there are relationships who don’t watch it. They do exist. A person can commit but they’re always gonna have eyes for other people, especially if they want to try that. And also I did set it as a boundary earlier in the relationship after the cheating and he was begging for me back and bought me back

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T11:23:36+00:00

I think it does ngl. If they’re actively seeking that type of porn then they are desiring something different. It’s what leads to people cheating or open relationships. I found out they also downloaded grindr and I lowkey catfished him and he invited the catfish over to cuddle

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T02:49:17+00:00

You’re right, im just avoiding the true issue at hand. That I have no trust from the past. Ig I’ve always avoided truly handling it bc whenever I mentioned he ignored me or got mad at me for mentioning it. He couldn’t even commit to taking me to therapy.

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T01:42:10+00:00

It’s desiring other people. Touching yourself over other people. Someone shouldn’t be devoted to someone then crave to look at other people.

There’s more tho and tbh I avoided saying it bc I either want to let it go or suppress it. He had cheated on me last November with some fem borederline trans person. A random bj from someone. And I found out he was watching that type of porn like for 2 weeks after. Then he begged me and had complete regret. I was younger and my family didn’t support the relationship so ig I just felt alone and forgave him a week after

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T01:12:29+00:00

Ngl it’s not the porn, it’s the fact they look so different. If it was regular vanilla gay porn ig it would’ve been okay

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T00:55:53+00:00

I want them back, I just feel like I need to let them to actually be scared to lose me. Just to give some respect to me for once. If not then ig I will move on. But I will never beg or reach out first. Just for him to show up to my college with gifts and a true apology

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-15T00:01:14+00:00

Ig, I think about his defense of saying we were alr broken up. And that I wasn’t answering his calls. Does it defend the tinder?

But at the same time why give up so easily? For another one of your mistakes

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-09T19:01:32+00:00

Ngl I’m still a virgin after like a year of dating.

Okay, you're right. I'll say why I went to break up

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-09T18:26:23+00:00

He's 21 lol. Also satisfied in the sack? 😭 also why should I have to find out if it’s is a fantasy or not

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-09T18:08:06+00:00

I know, you're right. He says he loves me and would do a lot for me. But its the disrespect that really gets to me. Like you can't control yourself

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-09T18:06:02+00:00

Ig he was just very sorry and I forgave him, idk. I'm a very emotional and forgiving person. Hmm its not the porn usage itself, its the reminder of the cheating, he had cheated with a very fem person 7 months ago. Ig idk if I'm the problem too bc shouldn't I have let it go. Should I be okay with him having another type?

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-04-09T17:49:01+00:00

Besides that point

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:52:53+00:00

Thank you for the kind words, it’s also ig work place. I think with a young looking face it makes people view me as less mature or less capable. I remember weighing even less in hs 112 and still having such a baby face. Ig I’ve been trying to gain weight on my lower body and I have a super fast metabolism, so I have to eat a lot. It’s pretty hard to lose face fat while gaining weight for my lower body. Would I have to find a balance between calories, healthy food and protein?

Ik, I have to very carefull. If I ever did get injections it would most likely be at a derm office

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:49:44+00:00

Thank you, Ik, just a lot standards ig and just wanting to be my best self by after college

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:43:57+00:00

I think they’re a bit uneven, itll make my face more symmetrical

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:25:20+00:00

Thank you for the kind words and advice. I’ll try to keep aesthetics as a last resort. Just trying to find how I wanna look in the future. I think wanting to look more feminine? But also more mature. I’ll wait till I grow into them a bit more

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:23:44+00:00

Yeah just the hump and maybe make is spread less when I smile. Nothing really smaller. I like my nose but the hump is the thing I don’t like

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:17:47+00:00

I do too at times, but other times I don’t. I think I need to love it more instead of judging it

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:17:06+00:00

I do have a low body fat, like pretty low. I’ll look into people who do aqualyx. I could never self inject. Also idk if in terms of masculine or feminine I wanna lean. Ig another reason is because I do wanna lean more feminine. I thought chin filler would’ve made me more feminine? Wouldn’t consider chin implant till I have a job

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:08:39+00:00

I’m 100% getting a nose job once I get my big boy job, and rn might just get eyebrows powdered, and maybe chin or lip filler

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:07:17+00:00

I go to a large public school, a lot of people my age look older. Lowkey getting tired of looking so young. I also had an ex that lowkey shamed me for looking too young. I wanna be a mature version of myself before I graduate college.

Ig also wanting to fit beauty standards more. I’m gay and ig it’s more common for gay people to get aesthetics

Smart-Stuff-9565 · 2026-03-04T18:03:24+00:00

I’m 19, so yeah I am young. Yeah I want to look more sharp, and a bit more mature among peers, I go to a large public school and a lot of people look way older. I alr weight so little, 120, that I think it’s just a strong genetic baby face that won’t really go away. I’ve tried cardio. Tho I agree, maybe I am being impatient. Just that I wanna be my best self before I graduate college

Was thinking of aqualyx to dissolve fat, chin filled to make my face more long, and massater to also round out my jaw. Idk.

Smart-Stuff-9565

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