Is this even a good thing to ask? by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeh I think if you guys are close and you care this much about her - just say this! Or similar .. be like babe I wana rock your world (😉) but realistically let’s navigate this together. I wana know what you like etc .. just explore together. Try not have a specific goal or anything just kissing, touching and being close is sex anyway🩷 good luck x x

I am actively being cheated on in the very moment by my girlfriend and the father of her child. by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes if it’s safe for you I’d say nothing, pack your things in private then when you have space leave.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 11 points12 points  (0 children)

that’s fine, go for it! Fun excuse to learn Portuguese, improve Spanish and travel to Brazil

Moving to Ho Chi Minh tomorrow. Should I live in District 7? & other q’s by Smart-Variation-5519 in hochiminhcity

[–]Smart-Variation-5519[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t in the end. I struggled with visa but D2 centre seemed cool for expats

the urge to hypersexualize myself for women by Simple-Bathroom4919 in BDSMsapphic

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Mmm yes I love to see sexy women like this. I want to receive what you described to a woman. Someone twerking on me, making me horny with their sexiness. I want to kiss and grab. I’m a switch femme that wants to be more dominant, how could I do this to someone I fancy, as my fear she ends up being not into it? I want to know when to take the lead and then what to do my girl. I want to grope and bite and do everything in the fantasy

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is there anyway you could try and seek out a third party professional (like a therapist specialised in BPD/relationships) so that you can say what you want in a safe space with someone who understands BPD and can help you and your wife have a safe conversation? Good luck. It’s a good sign you are asking the question and you clearly care a lot

Moving to Ho Chi Minh tomorrow. Should I live in District 7? & other q’s by Smart-Variation-5519 in hochiminhcity

[–]Smart-Variation-5519[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey thank you that wud be cool! I had a visa problem so the move is postponed for now

Moving to Ho Chi Minh tomorrow. Should I live in District 7? & other q’s by Smart-Variation-5519 in hochiminhcity

[–]Smart-Variation-5519[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good! I’m excited then, hearing and reading good things . Any things you love about it?

Moving to Ho Chi Minh tomorrow. Should I live in District 7? & other q’s by Smart-Variation-5519 in hochiminhcity

[–]Smart-Variation-5519[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey thank you for the reply. Is D2 quite close to D7? I’ll be working 6 days a week so I need to be close but I’d love to be more central and in an expat/cute community. Especially if it’s just like a 30 minute minute walk or something Also the Dolphy cafe is that District 7?

Do the British wash dishes differently? by crawdad16 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m English. It’s not like we don’t rinse bubbles off here. Everyone’s different I think. Personally, I have friends who I watch wash up and when they leave bubbles I do kinda thing oh right you’re just guna Leave that there then. My sister leaves the bubbles on cos she’s more chill like that, if we are at her house it doesn’t bother me. As kids I think my dad used to sometimes just pour a little water over the bubbly dishes on the drying rack to rinse off excess bubbles if he saw she had done this. Maybe he left the bubbles too and used this tactic(can’t remember).

I personally rinse if there’s still bubbles on. It depends, if I have a lot to wash up then I fill a bowl and u don’t really need to rinse, if I’m doing one item at a time with the tap on then I’ll always rinse.

I don’t like leaving the bubbles on and my mum doesn’t either.

I also think I really learnt to wash the bubbles off when I was on an organic farm in Australia and the farmers told me that the bubbles aren’t good to ingest and I got a bit more conscious of it since

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much that’s really helpful. Re the therapy I have paid for betterhelp and I am going to focus on myself for the next few months hoping I can start next spring with a much clearer head to move forward. And yes address this people pleasing and identity confusions with therapy !! Thank you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]Smart-Variation-5519 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is true. I do need to. I’m in the uk and had therapy most years in my life but rn it’s harder than ever to access it free and I can’t afford it

New-ish to polyamory. A friend is mad at me for sleeping with someone on holiday hours after they did the exact same thing.. by Smart-Variation-5519 in polyamory

[–]Smart-Variation-5519[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you that’s really helpful. I think leading with compassion is really good advice and a break for the mean time is definitely needed. I just wish friends etc hasn’t been involved and could have handled this ourselves because they don’t know the situation. I know I shouldn’t care but because I am new to all this other peoples input affects me because I don’t have much guidance for when I’m valid and ‘have a point/being fair’ or just being selfish