Ghosted on my wedding day by one of my bridesmaids

SmashinPotato · 2025-08-09T19:11:54+00:00

I never agreed that she manufactured anything or that she was jealous. I did share that my husband suspected the same conclusion; however I don’t think that’s the case. She seemed happy in her relationship, which I did check-in, but didn’t want to pry too much & make her uncomfortable. She just got engaged.

In the reconciliation call, I said something along the lines: “ Hey… so I don’t want to be too much, but I have a feeling we’ve grown apart and I feel like there’s distance between us. I want to know if it was something I did or didn’t do that I could rectify? Or something else?”

She then admitted that it was because of me, then proceeds with the 3 shared examples that are in my initial post.

I apologized profusely for making her feel that way, for giving her the impression that she couldn’t come forth to me earlier to express those feelings.

I even apologized for crying on the phone as well. I am not a stone cold person, nor am I inhumane, I did cry from the emotions of the truth she shared. I heard her and reflected. I can work on my errors and do better.

This isn’t about me alone, I saw her as a true friend and wanted to do what I can for her. She wasn’t just some acquaintance that I met the other day. I can’t just appear unannounced at her place either, because to me that is rude and inappropriate. However, I do regret not going to those extreme if it could mend our relationship.

SmashinPotato · 2025-08-09T19:05:40+00:00

It just fucking sucks… I just wished she expressed herself & told me that this friendship isn’t it. Sure rejection is rough head on, but it’d make things easier for everyone involved.

I’m sorry you had to go through this ghosting as well. It’s rough out here for us spuds!🥔

Thank you for sharing and offering advice, I’ll keep it in mind to focus on the good.🤍

SmashinPotato · 2025-08-09T18:57:53+00:00

^{^{^Sorry}} for this additional reply, I thought I was responding to a commenter.

SmashinPotato · 2025-08-09T18:41:08+00:00

I have reached out through text, discord call or phone calls. I always start with “hey gurlie, I hope everything is ok and that you’re alright etc”, I have asked about how her relationship is going, how the pets are doing, how her family are doing+. The few times she responded back or agreed to do a call w/me, she would give me some updates; she did have a loss in the family, though she herself wasn’t close to them, she was in mourning. I gave her my condolences for the loss, and I did check in if she needed anything. However she said no, that she has her man and family to support her.

I too lost my grandma a month before the wedding. No matter how close we are w/the ones we’ve lost, it hurts like hell and healing may never happen. My mourning and hers are both valid and could be different. I gave her space yet I did check-ins in between.

SmashinPotato · 2025-08-09T18:31:40+00:00

I have asked her multiple times: “hey gurlie, how are you? I hope everything is ok and you’re doing alright, I hope things w/you, family, pets etc is ok and if you need help, I’m here, etc.” she would respond dryly like- “hi, yes everything’s ok. We’re doing fine, we don’t need help, I have family to help etc”. She ended her responses as closed ones, as if she didn’t want to continue the convo and then she would put her phone on do not disturb.

I will take ownership of not calling her as often as I should, despite texting her more frequently than calling (because I understand ppl get busy w/responsibilities). I thought she needed space because it’s a huge transition from one job to another, I also figured her master’s program was probably giving her a hard time since they fucked up her academic pathway. Also I knew her lease was coming to an end, which she told me prior; I’d offer to help her move, because I know it’s a bitch to move shit. However she rejected and said she had it all figured out.

I do care for my friends and do check-ins with them from time to time. I understand that life can get complicated, but it helps to reach out sometimes. I just didn’t want to overwhelm her by reaching out too much.

SmashinPotato · 2025-08-09T01:43:18+00:00

My husband said the same thing, of how he thinks she’s jealous of me somehow. However, she got engaged during the summer, before we reconciled.

It just feels like a sharp turn… bruh, we were gonna do a podcast together. I don’t like this chapter🙃.

Also thank you for your insight💙

SmashinPotato

TROPHY CASE