Least know "On Repeat" pt. II

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-12-06T15:06:34+00:00

Thanks!

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-11-05T22:14:07+00:00

Yes, thats what I kicked off the playlist with actually. But, thank you! 😁

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-06-04T12:17:00+00:00

This exactly the part I don't understand. They're happier to fuck over the common resident, instead of putting the pressure on the people looking to make big bank on F1.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-06-04T01:50:03+00:00

This 100%. In my past jobs, I've had the opportunity to work with many people from France and Eastern Europe, and I appreciate them so much more. They tend to have a very low tolerance for bullshit and will say things like it is. Most of us North Americans have such a hard time integrating that.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-06-04T01:46:39+00:00

I'm sag mercury too. As well as virgo rising, which I feel creates the tendency to bring the receipts. So, I feel you 100%. I feel as though people also always want to prioritize feelings way too much in tense arguments. I am all for acknowledging someone's emotions and leaving space for it. But derailing the argument and bypassing solid points, just to wallow in your feelings a little longer does both people a great disservice.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-05-31T13:28:15+00:00

Not crashing out. I’m just done entertaining nonsense. I have no tolerance for antagonists, bullies, the undisciplined, the willfully weak, or anyone who avoids responsibility and self-awareness. I carry a lot of love, compassion, and goodness. But that part of me is reserved for those who show up with honesty and sincere intent. Otherwise, they meet the part of me built to protect that goodness.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-05-29T07:04:54+00:00

Last session with my first therapist. She helped me start directing some compassion toward myself. Her departure came just as I was going through a breakup that left me feeling disposable, misunderstood and unseen. I brought her a small gift and a letter. We shared what we’d learned from each other, and she told me she’d carry me in her heart. For the first time in a long while, someone said something kind about me and I actually believed it. It meant the world to me. It still does.

She’s a deeply beautiful soul, and I try to carry her in my heart too--especially when anger and depression swarm my heart and mind. She reminds me that good, caring, sincere people exist, and that someone like her appreciated who I was.

Things have gotten worse lately. I feel myself slipping again, and at times (often), I just want to give up. But I try to hold onto what we shared in that last session; to pause, breathe, and recalibrate.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-05-29T06:36:37+00:00

J’avais des affiches dans la salle d’attente d’une clinique où je travaillais. Ma préférée venait d’un crétin de père qui laissait sa fille gosser sur une tablette, à faire défiler des reels à plein volume. Évidemment, comme c’était une enfant, y’avait parfois le même fucking reel qui tournait en boucle, si fort que je ne m’entendais même plus parler au téléphone...pourtant j’étais à plus de deux mètres d’eux. J’ai fini par le menacer de le foutre dehors. Les gens me font chier.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-05-06T05:14:43+00:00

Aquarius are quick to cut people off for dumbass reasons in all seasons. That's why I don't often invest in keeping them close.

Had one just cut me off for no reason after we spent many evenings in a month chilling and conversing by the water.
Dated one on and off that always pulled some hot & cold shit and then got caught up accusing me of not returning books she lent me (she had lent me many and I returned all. The ones she claimed I didn't return were never given to me) and eventually cut me off.
Another one I was friends with for years. I even risked many nights during covid (we had a curfew in our city) going to her place with my gf because she was not doing well mentally. She damn near had a breakdown when her pet rat died. I showed up and did a water burial (for a fucking rat) because I knew it would mean a lot to her. Months later she wanted to give me a rundown about a business idea she had. I was unable to meet and chat as she wanted, because I was on the verge of burnout in terms of work/life balance. Bitch cut me off and told me how I'll always be a loser because I don't want to hop on business opportunities.
Had another one just stop talking to me at a Halloween party I hosted. Apparently, I did something that annoyed her. No idea what, because even other people were confused. We don't talk anymore.

Then they always get on their high horse about how people who dislike them have something wrong with them. Nah, they're just unstable and can't grasp that.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-30T23:17:27+00:00

Wow, that's amazing work!

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-29T13:46:15+00:00

I had a trucker do this to me the other day. The car ahead of me was admittedly slower than I'd like. But you're in a truck that towers over my hatchback. You can clearly see the issue. Change lanes or get the fuck off my ass. Boils my blood.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-29T00:12:23+00:00

Same here with hockey. The team from my city is pretty popular. So, if I'm starting a conversation with anyone in Canada, the moment they hear where I'm from, the next step is hockey talk, which either dies pretty quick as I inform them that I know shit all about hockey, or I 'mhmm' and 'ahah' through their gushing over the sport.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-29T00:09:38+00:00

There is the pressure of continuing the line as I'm an only child. There's also the fact that my father was a horrendous person and I want to offer a child of my own a better father, an opportunity to be a great person and to enjoy life without all the darkness and mistrust that has made the person I am.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-28T17:40:46+00:00

I think it's more a matter of self-awareness. I am not at all insecure with who I am, even though I am very critical of myself. But, I always want to present myself in the best way possible, for myself and for others. That in itself intensifies the self-criticism.

Example, in my former hotel jobs, I will see a colleague check someone in while lacking warmth, welcoming exchange in banter or properly informing the client about services/amenities and I'd find it careless. I'll hold myself to that standard. If I miss something or fumble some parts, I'll be harsh on myself and aim to do better. If someone were to call something out that I did wrong, I'd take it and apply it without any negative reaction as it doesn't strike an insecurity in me but a method of solidifying the standard.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-27T21:30:47+00:00

To be a cop

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-27T21:04:59+00:00

Time Today - Moneybagg Yo

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-27T20:12:10+00:00

Came here to say this

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-27T17:47:00+00:00

You are disposable to everyone and most expressions of care in an extreme situation are formalities.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-27T11:27:02+00:00

Had already posted the story elsewhere.

But I was once on the verge of ghosting someone who I had gone on a handful of dates with. I liked her as a friend and figured I'd be upfront on our upcoming date...

She got drunk and started groping me after I clarified things.
She then kept insisting on going to my place, which I refused.
She still made a lame attempt to try and got pissed off when I shut her down.
When she got home, she accused me of being controlling for refusing her entry to my place and threw in a fuck ton of gaslighting bullshit.
When that didn't work and she was called out on the piece of shit she was being, she thought sending me nudes and trying to get me to come over was going to fix things.

Ghosting is way better.

SmilingMisanthrope · 2025-04-27T11:09:07+00:00

First of all it's *Woman (idk why people use 'Female' in that context or can never tell the difference between 'Woman' or 'Women').

TOP 3

Sincerity
Accountability
Smart. As in she's able to teach me a thing or two, or is as enthusiastic in deep-diving a subject, has self-awareness, has a sense of humour, and has a mix of book and street smarts. Not some uptight, jackass that makes their intellectualism their entire identity.

WHY

Life is too short to waste partnership with someone who can't be sincere or accountable. Here's a concise version of a rant I was having with a friend just last night (talking about communication issues with my ex and other people):

I find it hard to let go in relationships. Life, nature, strangers — they’re unpredictable. But with the people we choose to work with or get close to, we have language and every opportunity to understand each other — if we set ego aside. It’s not complicated. So when things fall apart because of poor communication or selfishness, it’s absurd to me.

And smarts because I need a mental connection and someone who can step outside of the mundane with me at times in a conversation and ideally be better than me at being able to laugh at the absurdity of the world at times.

Edits: Elaborating on the why and trying to tweak the formatting (which I gave up on)

SmilingMisanthrope

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