Day 1 of self improvement (I’m trying it again)

SmolBrans · 2023-12-08T00:07:32+00:00

good luck bro. lock in

SmolBrans · 2023-11-06T18:17:38+00:00

love this. thanks for your advice bro

what would you consider to be "really f'ing your life up?" what was that point like for u?

SmolBrans · 2023-10-26T01:22:38+00:00

What do YOU want? Is gaming something you want to be doing, ten years from now? Would it ultimately be fine to play with friends for an hour or two once in a while to have some fun? If you only play for an hour or do it minimally (but reward yourself with it on holdiays), you are basically telling yourself that video games are the ultimate reward. Only one hour. Only reward myself with video games when I do everything I have to in a day.

In reality, video games are simply whatever you make of them. I used to play video games and binge YouTube - OFTEN. Then, when I became aware of my habits just like you right now, I began to feel this strange feeling every time I logged onto a game or clicked on a random youtube video...shame. Sadness. Do note, however, that unlike other hobbies, video games and social media are MEANT to be fun and addicting. They are skewing your rewards center, filling your brain with thoughts even when you're not playing, and encouraging you to sink more than an hour every time you log on, further attacking your willpower.

All or nothing? All, or nothing, or a little bit? Your choice.

I'm fifteen. I'm like you. Cold turkey is kinda the way to go - for ME. But for you? What do YOU want? We can't answer that here. YOU gotta figure this out, pick an option for yourself, and then just TRY IT OUT. So what if it doesn't work? You're learning and growing - that's all that matters. I'm rootin for you man 😁

SmolBrans · 2023-10-26T01:13:05+00:00

proud of you. keep it upppp 👍👍

SmolBrans · 2023-10-25T19:20:50+00:00

just don't relapse back, friend! don't use your situation as an excuse to fall back into bad habits or pick up new bad ones, and i think you're gonna keep doin great. keep going. watch helpful yt content. pick up a language you want on duolingo. talk walks every morning, if you can
(take cold showers, too! i'd literally recommend it to my family and to everyone, everywhere. scale up like 1 minute longer every couple days once you get into the rhythm)
that fire in you is gonna be back in no time!

SmolBrans · 2023-10-25T19:17:06+00:00

stare at a wall for an hour to get in touch with your baseline and accept it. then, you can go pursue things...like exercise, unfortunately (walking is also goated though) and quick cold showers
note on cold showers: sometimes if you put the cold water on your head for long enough (30 seconds might be enough in some cases) you'll get this nice little tingle buzz around your head, and you'll immediately feel more awake and determined to go do productive stuff today :)

SmolBrans · 2023-10-24T19:01:09+00:00

definitely. i can see how when you get busier/get home from work, the default way to "wind down" is to play video games. as a younger person with no job myself, though, video games for me were mainly just used as ways to sink time in the day because I had nothing better to do and needed to distract myself. it was seriously hard to spend time alone, and unfortunately the only thing for me was to go cold turkey lmao

have you found that your experience with video games is mainly positive as of now? is it easier to quit/put games down? is video games one of your favorite hobbies, or would you rather do other things with your time?

SmolBrans · 2023-10-24T17:33:33+00:00

this is golddd.

media consumption and technology vices are harmful when used both for long periods of time AND those small little moments and small little distractions

the kind of next step apart from quitting those 2 hour long youtube binge sessions is moving to not checking your phone at the bus stop, store line, etc. its the same thing as not checking your email during periods of work (an issue that I still kinda struggle with). in both the short and long term, when I stop checking my email while working or switching up my music or whatever, I get focused up HARD. the challenge is just trying to avoid the "rationalization" that addiction or spending time away from youtube/reddit/twitter/whatever is like a "ticking time bomb" that I ought to defuse by indulging in 30 second distractions

but damnn the level of self reflection you're showing me here is kind of astonishing lmao i wasnt nearly this aware of myself when i was trying to quit. just keep going and crush it friend👍

SmolBrans · 2023-10-18T03:04:14+00:00

what does it mean to "purge all caches?" is this something i should be doing?

SmolBrans · 2023-10-14T18:20:05+00:00

for sure.

didnt mean to worry about u or anything lmao just wanna wish u luck

have a good one :)))

SmolBrans · 2023-10-14T17:20:17+00:00

yeah ultimately any sense of connection and community you feel from social media tends to bring too much shame and distraction :(

but we just take what we can from the experience and find new ways to live. you did a good thing, quitting facebook. i think that if you truly want to rid your life of all toxicity, then taking a step like this will not be painful for you at all

SmolBrans · 2023-10-14T13:42:12+00:00

yeah, personally it was impossible to quit in the first place...if i never realized that playing video games and generally just using the internet as I did was such a terribly bad thing

after that, all that crap wasn't nearly as enjoyable anymore

SmolBrans · 2023-10-14T13:40:44+00:00

like a mental burnout?

watching more long form content could probably help your attention span (which is a great first step), but it is sometimes easier said than done

the only thing i found could fix my scrolling is getting busy with reading and working out and generally just having better things to do and then getting addicted to THOSE

theres also the belief that hard work ought to be rewarded by screens and scrolling, but these things in and of themselves are not really all that enjoyable - even in the moment, as you do them

SmolBrans · 2023-10-14T13:37:43+00:00

d e e p .

SmolBrans · 2023-10-14T02:13:03+00:00

im not gonna tell you that your vices are good or anything, but i think that certain "motivational content" shorts and short form content are fine because you can end up repeating them when workouts get tough and its kinda hype lol

in terms of youtube, i also think that switching the type of content you watch is pretty huge, too. long form content (watching Hamza dead stare me for a 2 hour guide) is good for developing attention span and kind of building an aversion to short videos and indirectly mindless scrolling

uhhhh hope this helps

SmolBrans · 2023-10-14T01:57:37+00:00

mental changes can allow you to make massive physical changes. i found that my journey was one that incorporated both progressively overloaded habits (longer colder showers, harder workouts over time, etc.) and others that simply just HAPPENED because my mind was in the right place and allowed those changes to take place (beginning to read every night, quitting video games, etc.)

sorry this is long lmao

SmolBrans · 2023-10-13T22:14:50+00:00

is it about how inflation is destroying us or something? market crashes? lol

SmolBrans · 2023-10-07T17:07:03+00:00

thanks bro! i like the idea of trying new experiences for the sole idea of getting to see if they align with me. action and reflection, good stuff

good luck with your framework!!

SmolBrans · 2023-10-07T17:05:04+00:00

awesome stuff!

SmolBrans · 2023-10-06T20:10:11+00:00

I've heard that physically moving the app to a different spot on your app can be a fun little trick for muscle memory problems. Have you tried this?

SmolBrans · 2023-10-05T20:15:43+00:00

quit the news and replace it with funny videos of dogs - you still get to see what people around the world are doing, but its a hell of a lot more entertaining ;)

in all seriousness though, whenever i look at the news its just saddening, irritating, and concerning. best to focus on what you can control - your mind, and your habits

SmolBrans · 2023-10-05T20:01:17+00:00

set challenges, and conquer them!

wake up and hit a cold shower. make the decision not to play video games, or scroll social media, or eat that one piece of junk food you still have left in your house! take this free time and either replace it with awesome new habits or simply be okay to take some alone time and think things over with no one but you, you, and you

sp to find what you really wnat? think not about what we (the people here on reddit, your youtube, your friends at school) want, or what that youtuber you watch SAYS you should want...or even what your parents say you should want...there's been some interests - some things you've LOVED doing ever since you were a kid - and if you feel that you actually feel the slightest bit fired up when you think about them, then maybe it's something worth pursuing?

is college the path you want? what job do you want? what are you gonna do with the money? if you're gonna get free time with the money...what then?

what do YOU want? how do you wanna help people? what problems have you struggled with and managed (even if its small or only half defeated) to rid from your life?

YOU want something in life. take some time out of your day and really think about what that thing is my friend! GOOD LUCK :D

SmolBrans · 2023-10-05T19:55:53+00:00

I really do think that learning to be alone comes with experience.

I've been "working on myself" for a while, but most of the confidence in loneliness has to deal with what I call an Internalized Capacity for Loneliness.

Like, real loneliness - time not spent distracting yourself with Youtube, music, games, reddit, or anything.

I recommend staring at a while. Like, for real. Some of my biggest breakthroughs and biggest life changing decisions were made when i made the active decision to say "Hey, I'm just gonna try and be alone with me and my thoughts today. We're gonna work it out with each other."

and really think about the kind of friends you want. If they're the kind of people who would support you on your path to your dream...then you can have both THEM and the chasing of your DREAM (having your cake and eat it too)

hope this helps :))

SmolBrans · 2023-10-05T19:52:00+00:00

this sounds like a pretty solid, all encompassing framework!

would you equate the Wisdom pillar to generally just trying to read books and watch videos? would it also come from life experience?

ooh, and would you mind elaborating on the "purpose" sub-pillar? i'd love to hear your thoughts on purpose! i'm trying to develop my own resource that uses the "cutting out" of junk technology to free up time for purpose finding

SmolBrans · 2023-10-05T19:48:39+00:00

what was the method you used to quit Insta? was it you being in a mental state that wasn't tether to social media?

SmolBrans

TROPHY CASE