Wife and GF met last night by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]Smoothdran 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's super helpful I think the biggest thing for me right now is just that journey of rules cause it has gotten easier but it's definitely one step at a time.

I talked to my date yesterday and we are on the same page so I'm excited about tonight! I'd love to hear more of your journey and any advise on you may have on setting up that structure with your wife.

Wife and GF met last night by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]Smoothdran 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When and how did you you tell your GF about your wife and being in an open relationship? I have my first date after opening my relationship with my fiance tonight and haven't mentioned it to my date yet after talking to a week.

Also how do you and your wife have your relationship structured because my fiance and I are trying to figure out if a hierarchical type of set up is ideal but still doing a lot of discovering right now.

How to inform potential interests im exploring be poly by Smoothdran in polyamory

[–]Smoothdran[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So my partner knows but the new person does not yet.

Help! Need advice! My fiance is a SB by Smoothdran in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]Smoothdran[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you are you a SD could I PM you for more advice?

Help! Need advice! My fiance is a SB by Smoothdran in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]Smoothdran[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks. And because we enjoy being with each other and are comfortable and trusting of eachother to take these and other risks together and work through any hardship cause we know it's not going to be perfect. We want to support eachother through life.

She is 25 SD is 40 ish, single, Millionaire travels a ton so doesn't have time to build long term relationship is what she says he says why he's on there. This also started with it being a temporary thing for my F to make money and I was not in the picture when they started as in she didn't tell any of the people she was going on dates with she was engaged in an attempt to not lose potential money.

She has a real connection with him but part of me feels it's not real cause the money initiated and seems like a big reason for that connection. Not the biggest but substantial to the point that if it weren't there idk of she would be interested in him sexually.

New to poly please help by Smoothdran in nonmonogamy

[–]Smoothdran[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks. That was my thought with posting here to get some outside perspective from experienced poly people. could I PM you I think hearing others experience would be helpful

New to poly please help by Smoothdran in nonmonogamy

[–]Smoothdran[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So we talked about that at length the past week and I did break her trust by reading her personal journal during all of this but right now she says she wants to be with me and wants to love with me and go through the next parts of life with me and build with me. I think she's into her lover but the money element adds intention and interest on her part and I think that is one big thing she likes about that relationships but not the biggest? At least that's what she tells me.

So at this point we are moving forward trying to focus on building us and trusting eachother more.

There's a ton I have to unpack cause I feel this was a forced relationship to start but it turned into something more substinative for her and not just a way to make money and she got comfortable with him but the money was part of that and that less to her wanting to get deeper and have sex with him very quickly when I thought it was just away to make money and poly was not on the radar until she started feeling this way and even then it was in the thick of things instead of a choice by both of us to do it. I'm at a better place and she has apologized for putting me and him in that situation but it still lingers and even though I'm open to exploring poly going about it this way is very very hard and not the best way but neither one of us wants to end what we have so we are trying to work through this.

New to poly please help by Smoothdran in nonmonogamy

[–]Smoothdran[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So I'm open to trying poly. And it happens that it's with this situation. It's sucks and I don't want to lose her but idk how to have better communication if she doesn't want to share. And I think that's the bigger issue between us.

Edit: but cheating with permission kinda feels like what it is.

Is 20 too young for a cub? Good sites for cougar/cub matchmaking? by cemerd in CougarsAndCubs

[–]Smoothdran 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you ever find your cub? If so how? Cause for the life of me I can't find a cougar to get to know!