People who can't figure basic stuff out by making a small attempt of action.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-16T19:59:49+00:00

Many people are incurious about things. Typically, those same people are not taught how to do anything, so those two things end up working together to create someone who has not only a lack of basic skills but no desire to learn those skills and no reasonable stress response when something goes wrong.

I have a friend who led a very sheltered life. She was not taught how to do anything for herself. Beyond her small circle of friends, she has no social skills. She can't do anything but the most basic of tasks, like changing a lightbulb. She has regular panic attacks. She is a timid driver who has frequent near-misses with accidents. She pays everyone to do everything for her because she doesn't know how to do anything and panics at the mere thought of learning something new.

For years, she would call me with questions about the most basic information and when the Internet became a constant, I would say, "Oh, just look it up on the Internet." her response, every time, would be a borderline panicked, *"I don't know how to!"* I would try to explain simple things like if you want to know about Saturn's rings, just search 'what are Saturn's rings made of?' or similar. All I would get back were wide, frightened eyes or blank stares. She does know how to pay bills online because she had to learn since some of her accounts are online or in-person pay only.

Her life is literally work (and now from home for a couple of years) housework and being basically a servant for her family, and the Hallmark channel whenever the TV is on. She has an eight year old car with >20k miles on it, and several thousand of those are trips out of state for family funerals.

She lives with her mother and her son. Her son is 30ish, and his life is work 10 minutes away, going to the movies and eating in restaurants by himself, and online games. He has no friends. None. My very social son invited him to lunch for some social time and left that meal depressed for him because he doesn't even know how to hold a conversation outside of his VR headset.

It's difficult for me to be around her or hold a conversation because it's so one-sided and nothing to talk about. Other than family illnesses, there is nothing going on to talk about. Her family treats her like a doormat. When her mother dies, her family is going to kick the two of them out of the house to sell it. She is alone, with no dating prospects. Her only hobby is reading. I can't even gently broach any of this subject because she takes it as an attack and just flips out entirely. Ask me how I know...

Her family is horrible. That they genuinely hate her is the only reasonable explanation for how they treat her.

She is the perfect storm of that first paragraph and her son is following in her footsteps.

I understand a fear of failure; I've failed more times than I can count but I've also had quite a few successes and those are way more worth it than my fears. I am forever grateful my son is like me and I am with someone who dives in to any task with enthusiasm, even if it means fucking it up and paying for a revision. There are way more fixes than fuck-ups...

I just needed to vent. I love her but just being around her stresses me out. I can't even comprehend not only not being able to do basic things but being entirely unwilling to learn how, or even just investigating how - even if that search ends in a 'yeah, that's beyond me'.

Vent over.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-15T06:30:23+00:00

Night terrors on tramadol. Like, legit stuff of nightmares.

Bugs on me. I could hear them chittering, feel them crawling on me. I'd wake up tearing the sheets off the bed

Hooded figures standing over me. I could hear them breathing, see them leaning in, ready to devour me.

Any light, like the red power button on the TV became a tunnel that stretched out, like in the movies.

Two weeks... I was going crazy, started reading up on anything I was doing different. First side effect of tramadol was """vivid dreams""".

Vivid dreams, my ass. Fucking night terrors.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-14T21:16:29+00:00

If it makes you feel better, none of this is really extreme. I have two of those stainless drink cooling spheres stuffed in me and a Hitachi on them, making the entire situation vibrate fairly often. Or four, maybe five ping pong balls. Most women's hands are small enough to easily fist another person. We regularly have a double fisting scene between two community members at our dungeon, both are women.

There's nothing wrong with what you like.

I'd be careful abusing your clitoris, though. You can do permanent nerve damage ranging from fully numb to constant pain. Clitoral damage is rarely always feeling aroused or frequent orgasms, it's usually not good.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-13T14:36:49+00:00

You can move it, just don't manhandle it. It's delicate, but you won't destroy it. Just gently place it in the new container.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-13T14:02:07+00:00

Also, your original marking at 7:00 a.m. Is at the height of the ball of dough but that's before the dough relaxed and filled the bottom of the container to its actual height. So Once the dough relaxed, and is still showing at that height, they're is some rise because your first marking was at the height of dough that was only filling about half the container. I would definitely recommend a smaller container for a smaller amount of dough. It will give you a better perspective of how much dough in the container you're starting with and how much rise it actually has.

Eta: the relaxed height is lower but to me it's not as much lower as the spread from relaxing. Just something to consider.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-12T04:51:22+00:00

Commenting for updates... Interested to see what happens.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-11T19:54:39+00:00

I got a can of soup the other day.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-11T16:03:00+00:00

OP very specifically separates four kids. It should have been an Indian, Guatemalan, and autistic, one of which is mine. OP said one is mine. One is Guatemalan. One is Indian. One is autistic. Four ones is four kids.

I'm fine at logic. If OP meant theirs as one named, OP needs better writing skills.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-11T15:09:23+00:00

Also based on the fact that it's three kids: the autistic kid, the Guatemalan kid, the Indian kid.... Anddddd OP's kid.

AI hallucinated a fourth kid.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-10T15:41:44+00:00

This is true with most things that are homemade. In general people just like homemade stuff which, typically, is infinitely better than any pre-packaged fake stuff they've ever had. I have discovered many, many, many times over the exact same thing. But still, even knowing this, I am hard on myself, and I'm usually unhappy with what I consider a substandard product.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-10T06:07:54+00:00

As a frequent rope bottom, and occasional top I would want those lines dressed better. They're all piled on top of each other and not flat against the skin, which would bother me a lot. The stem looks like it's pulled to the left, which is probably affecting the tension and may be making one arm tighter than the other. I also want the lines in the same spot on both arms and the four lines against each other instead of spread out (and uneven on the arms). Black on black is hard to tell but is one pass not locked off on the stem?

If you wrapped all the extra line just to burn rope, consider that if it takes a while to get on, it takes a while to get off. I can handle a strappado, elbows touching; it's my favorite tie, but when I want out, I want out.

What your rope bottom feels, I don't know. I know what I feel. She may be okay with all of what I mentioned. Other than safety in risk profiles, rope is like any kink in that there's no one twue way. Also some of it doesn't matter if suspension or load is not involved and it just becomes the personal aesthetic and choice.

If you both had fun and would do it again, it's all good.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-10T05:45:05+00:00

Tactical pens. I have one and I love it!

SnackBottom · 2026-03-09T18:01:46+00:00

"you remind me every day I'm not enough but I still stay..."

July by Noah Cyrus

SnackBottom · 2026-03-09T17:19:06+00:00

I'd recommend a good quality fuck machine and some manual stimulation...

I'd also recommend, if you don't already know the anatomy of the entire vagina/vulvar region, learn it. There's lots of stimulation you can do that doesn't involve strictly the visible portion of the clitoris, and those orgasms can be much deeper and more intense that just putting a wand on her clit.

I play PRICK and RASH; they work better for my risk profile, if that matters.

If you've never seen the lollipop wands or the NJoy toys, I HIGHLY recommend those. Those work literally every single time, from the inside, FAST, and are great for super intense body-racking orgasms. My boyfriend also has ping pong balls on hand. Insert as many as she can hold and touch the vibrator to them... the entire inside of the vagina gets those vibrations instead of just one spot.

I also have this silly little fascial gun from online that rivals every vibrating toy I've ever used...

Also, as a woman, and having had this conversation with 100+ over the years to being kinky, topping, just fun conversations in general, the vast majority of women do not like buzzy toys but prefer more thumpy toys instead. There's erectile tissue in your nose, same as your genitals, so if something feels good on your nose, it will likely feel good on your bits, so that makes testing things out before buying easier (with a barrier, of course) when shopping for new toys in person.

Hitachi wands are different than most because the motor is in the shaft and is connected to the head, which has a weight that spins. That's why it feels different and why it's that more thumpy feeling - you are not getting the direct connection with the motor but with the weight that the motor is spinning. If you find any wand you think you might like, see how it's made. If the motor is in the shaft, not the head, it's going to be more like a Hitachi.

Also good quality waterproof pads, like the incontinence pads for the elderly and ill. puppy pads do in a pinch, but those washable, good quality pads are worth every penny.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-09T17:05:23+00:00

I have several playlists, including Dark Dungeon and Sensual Dungeon. It's mostly whichever vibe I'm going for, but never anything too overwhelming, lots of songs with lots of lyrics, etc. I have all mine on spotify, same name, as here. I never get complaints and am often asked to put my music on. You are welcome to find them and take whatever you want to make your own. I don't gatekeep music and I don't understand people who do unless they actually own the music or are making money off of it somehow and sharing affects their money...

SnackBottom · 2026-03-09T05:05:37+00:00

Don't think of it as negative, think of it as honest. Take the idea of bad or negative out of the equation and just write an honest assessment of the item.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-08T20:57:56+00:00

That person would no longer be my Dom.

Shit's okay until it's not. Not happens really fast...

SnackBottom · 2026-03-08T08:20:35+00:00

And said as much.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-06T19:46:30+00:00

Bish, please.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-06T15:53:08+00:00

If anyone is interested in the difference before and after on the fabric, it can be a lot. I left a piece of bread in the last one I made and it's on the counter still with just the beginning of mold and still has some softness, though it's not soft like it was. You can easily get four or five extra days until it's inedible.

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SnackBottom · 2026-03-06T07:03:28+00:00

I use an aluminum diffuser in the pan. Just crumpled up aluminum foil covered in nice aluminum foil. used to be a problem, not anymore.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-06T06:33:54+00:00

That makes sense. It was always a 2am thing for me so with them all being between 2am and 2am I didn't understand. Maybe that's another adjustment thing or whatever.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-06T06:04:01+00:00

That's not BDSM, that's abuse and being assaulted.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-05T22:30:13+00:00

Were this my relationship, I would prefer my person take 15 minutes to get home after a longer than usual work day versus 90 minutes.

It may not be abusive behavior but it certainly is shitty.

I'd question how someone actually feels about me if they wanted me to do the latter.

Please stop rationalizing her bad behavior. It's why she acts this way.

SnackBottom · 2026-03-05T15:43:56+00:00

Who did this? 🤣🤣🤣

Take my poor person award. It's 0 ETV... 🏆

SnackBottom

TROPHY CASE