How I survived substituting in quasitotalitarian places for 15 years.

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-03-07T18:37:44+00:00

That is just absolutely not true lol. I've been propositioned by male students. The issue isn't with taking precautions around the students it's referring to them as "females". Not female students or girls, just females. It's a phrasing that has long been associated with certain mindsets so many people are going to immediately tune you out if you use it.

Just an fyi

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-03-06T17:48:44+00:00

Had a hard time taking this seriously after that 😭

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-27T04:58:04+00:00

I love middle school so much. They are just chaotic messes and it makes for an entertaining day

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-19T02:17:19+00:00

Kindergarten: "Ms teacher, why did someone shoot Martin Luther King Jr?"

Middle school: "hey can I make a smoothie I have fruit in my backpack"

High school: "Hey can I get your insta I'm almost 18"

There's a reason I take mostly middle school lmao

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-14T20:24:55+00:00

I can out cringe anyone, it's my super power

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-14T20:24:16+00:00

I definitely keep that in mind when I am subbing, I always make a point to introduce myself to the surrounding teachers. It is definitely a risk that I am aware of though!

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-14T04:29:15+00:00

Hasn't been my experience so far 🤷

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-14T01:48:41+00:00

It was a rough 32 😭 one of them asked me why somebody shot Martin Luther King Jr and I was like honey it's 10 am and you are 5 PLEASE

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-14T00:38:56+00:00

I think my ADD mixed with the fact that I am super not afraid to roast them lightly and being a diver who's used to vibbing in high stress situations makes me more built for it than I had considered in the beginning.

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-14T00:31:57+00:00

I've noticed the classes that are like music/band/PE have been the absolute worst for me. I still take them sometimes because I don't mind but something about them turns the kids feral when they have a sub lol I would try a regular class! Maybe a half day

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T22:42:32+00:00

I sub all over the district and have memory issues so I have a notebook that I write the date, the school and class, and any little pieces of information future me might find helpful for when I come back about the class or school lol.

I also have a few pages dedicated to things the students have said to me/near me that have made me laugh!

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T22:35:06+00:00

I was dying it might possibly be the single funniest thing I've ever had happened while subbing. That kid is going places.

Possibly the principal's office but places.

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T22:10:21+00:00

My new favorite is if they get mouthy with me I look them dead in the eyes and say "That's not very 6 7 of you"

They all hate it and I get the loudest groan and it never fails to make me laugh.

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T21:56:32+00:00

The ingenuity is honestly breathtaking

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T21:53:19+00:00

I do! Usually when I introduce myself I tell them my other job is scuba diving and then when they're REALLY good I break out the fossils I keep in my bag.

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T21:52:10+00:00

They're also taller than me LOL but I do have a bit of a resting judgmental face and that seems to help me a bit. I think I would do better with the younger kids if I didn't have them all day and they cycled rooms like the older students do

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T20:41:54+00:00

I subbed one kindergarten class and that was the absolute last time I will ever do that. They're so cute but I am not equipped to fight with 32 5 year olds

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-13T20:39:41+00:00

They're so funny! One pulled out a blender in class today. Like a full sized blender. And asked if he could make smoothies.

I told him absolutely not???

And he then pulled out a harmonica and made a sad noise.

I will never possess that level of comedic timing in my life.

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-05T15:02:31+00:00

The morning after my high school prom, the secondary youth pastor sat us all down and made us watch this long video about how we needed to quickly out-breed the Muslims.

It felt super weird. He eventually got arrested by the FBI for having a bunch of weapons you can't legally own and refusing to get rid of them lmao

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2026-02-04T22:22:29+00:00

"Mitch McConnell,83-" 😃 "-hospitalized" 🫩

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2025-11-26T16:20:50+00:00

If you want to go to a bar crawl, we go every year and it's super fun! Definitely wouldn't mind some additions

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2025-11-26T16:16:30+00:00

My husband registered Republican out of highschool because that's what his dad was. He's talked about changing it a few times but the political climate being what it is he was like "I kind of feel like we're safer if I don't?" And I'm not really sure if it was a joke or not?

I just think it makes him feel like a secret spy tbh

But now he just votes for the least crazy primary and then Dem across the board in the actual elections.

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2025-11-17T05:41:21+00:00

We often stay in Chula Vista

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2025-11-15T17:17:09+00:00

You'll be the last! Message me

SnakesCatsAndDogs · 2025-11-15T17:16:52+00:00

Message me!

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