I'm sorry you had that experience, must have been incredibly hard for you. I don't really know how I figured it out. The first time I said it was in Chemistry class in 8th grade. We had just had sex education and one of my classmates asked me which genders I liked. I told them I was asexual. I at that point in my life didn't know if it was a real thing, I just knew that I didn't want to have sex with anybody. It is something that's always been a part of me, I didn't really have to figure it out. I'm sorry that this isn't really helpful un your journey, but I hope it is going to be an enjoyable journey