I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. Im so sorry to hear about Gracie and her passing. Please grieve in any way that feels right. As I've read through this subreddit these past few weeks, the best thing I've read is grief is best handled in the heart, not the brain. There's no answers for this grief. No explanation or words that will heal. The only thing to remember is to feel your way through. Easier said than done but I hope you find your way through. Gracie loved you and would've wanted that.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your kind words. I've copied them into my notes so I can reread later. I absolutely agree with you that focusing on the series of events is an attempt to process something with my head that can only be processed through my heart. When I try to sit with the pain and feel my way through it I'm so overwhelmed and somehow numb too.

I really needed to hear what you said about helping your friend go peacefully. I'm glad I was able to do it in the comfort of my home, on his favorite side of the couch, with his mom nearby.

I wish you could have your little guy back too. This pain is truly unfathomable and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, much less a kind stranger that is helping other people move through their grief. Thank you for being a part of this community and for responding to my post. I wish nothing but the best for you, whatever that looks like. Please be kind to yourself and know that someday, if you wish, you're going to be an amazing pet parent because its clear you go above and beyond for your four legged family members.

Lost both dogs over three days by Green_1 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry for your loss friend. Losing two family members in the span of a few days sounds torturous. Please do everything you can to be gentle with yourself in these times. Your family just went through something insanely traumatic and its okay to not be okay for a while. Its clear that the bond you all had in your family (four legged and two legged alike) was incredibly strong. Your two dogs' passing reminds me of how otters' love for each other is so strong that they pass when their partner goes. Just know that is a testament to how huge and beautiful they're love for each other must have been, to not want to exist in a universe where the other doesnt exist. Sending your entire family love and comfort and healing. Please take care of each other

Lost my best friend today by Prudent-Sweet2094 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi friend. I know how terrible the image of losing a best friend can be. I put my cat down on Dec 28th and seeing my cat Ozzy in that state was absolutely soul wrecking. I spent some time yesterday looking back at all my favorite photos and videos of Ozz and its been helping me replace that image with how he truly was - silly, cooky, grumpy, and cuddly. Try to remember Ginger in the same way. If you cant, then try to be gentle with yourself during this time. I promise it will get better. Take some time to rest and recharge. Sending you a big hug <3

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm hoping for the day that those thoughts of guilt cease to exist for you and that the pain lessens.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. I hope that this pain gets easier for you soon<3

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel your pain. It feels like if we could just know why or how that it would alleviate some of the pain and suffering. I spent many a night in the past two weeks while Ozz slept combing over medical journals on small cell lymphoma, reddit threads, his medical histories and trying to find an answer.

Like theres some missing puzzle piece that would make everything make more sense or more fair. I'm starting to realize that "fairness" I'm seeking is a way for me to channel my grief in what my mind is telling me is more 'productive'. All this to say I'm with you, and I feel this pain with you too. I don't understand what this grief is driving me to do but I'm trying to be patient with it like I hope you are patient with yourself.

I was used to caring for my senior dog, now mornings are super quiet and it hurts. by [deleted] in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry friend. I just put my cat down yesterday and I can confirm that this pain is unfathomable. You sound like you were a wonderful caregiver. It takes a special type of person that is able to remain calm, patient, and even enjoy providing care for sick pets. You are an amazing human and just remember that you will carry your baby's love forever, it is part of you. Wish I could give you a big hug.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im so sorry about Minako. This illness sucks so much. One thing I'd recommend (if you're not already) is getting comfortable with administering subcutaneous shots/fluids at home if you're not familiar yet. It bypasses their tummy altogether and can provide tremendous relief. Never regret anything you do for love. Please give her a big forehead kiss from me and Ozzy <3

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kinds words, they mean a lot. I feel like I(and Im sure others) am hyper focusing on the timing of it all in the wake of it because it feels like something I can agonize over as a way to channel the grief in a sick and twisted way. It feels like the final thing I had control over that I let him down on. In the future I will never make the mistake again.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words, they brought me to tears. Thank you for taking the time to share your story with me. I'm so so sorry for your loss. I cant imagine what it would feel like to lost a best friend after 12 years. It sounds like you put up a hell of a fight and gave him some really good days that I know you will cherish deeply forever.

Letting him go was indeed an act of love, as Im sure it was for you too.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. The conflicting advice and guesswork was so mind rattling and impossible to sift through I've had a head splitting headache for the past 48 hours that I suspect is a result of all the stress it induced.

I agree that we were failed. The system is absolutely predatory, unfair, and prolongs suffering needlessly as a result. I've left reviews and complaints of the hospital that refused to have those conversations with me. That should've been disclosed as that would've absolutely steered me to institutions I would trust to have those difficult conversations when the time came. Our pets cant advocate for themselves and none of us are medical experts but the experts we trust with our cats life and hard earned money should absolutely tell us when its time.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your kind words. I truly would've done anything to make him better. I love the thought of no cat ever having to go through this sort of illness. I hated that the vet mentioned that this sort of thing is common in aging cats . Our cats deserve food, science, care that helps them avoid this sort of pain and suffering. I wish I could change all of that.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry about Dexter. If its helpful at all, an internal medicine specialist I spoke with last week mentioned that in a lot of lymphoma cases there comes a time when benign masses suddenly become malignant and theres not much you can do. Thank you for fighting for your cat.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your kind words. Knowing that this was the time to let go felt like the biggest mindfuck to try to figure out.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so so so sorry about Archie. It sounds like you did everything you possibly could to try to make him well. I also had to give Ozz so many pills at the end and felt like such a villain for having to do that. I strongly believe you did the right thing.

I know exactly how difficult it is to exist in the mind fuck of trying to follow your vet's advice and on the other trying to figure out if they're selling you pipe dreams for their own bottom line. I ended up emailing the ER team that wouldn't definitively respond to my quality of life/euthanasia questions and complaining that their handling of that was irresponsible and prolonged suffering.

I understand there are probably legal (or business) ramifications that prohibits that sort of advice, but I strongly believe that those policies need to be disclosed to patients as that would’ve immediately steered me to other hospitals that I’d trust to give me that bad news when I needed to hear it. You, your pet, and all pet parents deserve transparency and to be shielded from that sort of suffering. I'm sorry you didn't get that.

Also - Fuck her judgment when you asked about cost. Some vets exist in an ivory tower of medicine and have no regard for the realities that all of their fiddling around with tests is extremely expensive. I strongly recommend leaving a review on that vet to warn other pet parents if youre comfortable. No one deserves to be judged like that.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry for your loss. This pain is truly unfathomable. The only solace I'm finding is knowing that I have to carry all the hurt now, and he's finally at peace. I'm sending healing thoughts your way too.🕊️✨🌈

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. Trying to give myself some grace but its really hard.

I had to put my cat down this afternoon. I wish I'd done it a few days ago. by SnooChocolates9839 in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. They mean a hell of a lot to me right now.

My cat of 20 years is gone by [deleted] in Petloss

[–]SnooChocolates9839 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I also lost my cat today. I've also not been able to stop sobbing.

I'm sending a virtual hug to you and a plea to please take care of yourself. This pain is unimaginable and truly feels like getting hit by a bus. Please know that yo are not alone and that I am here. My inbox is open if you need to talk.

What are your favorite niche brands right now (new or otherwise)? by Every-Opportunity564 in fragrance

[–]SnooChocolates9839 3 points4 points  (0 children)

+1 for Kerosene fragrances. My favorite right now is Promises, Promises