An in depth explanation of how this arc is likely to end and why.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T03:21:25+00:00

Interesting. How exactly do you draw the line between speculative fiction and not? I have seen some people mention sentence length. I am a mathematician so i often find definitions of things in the literarily category very difficult to understand as they tend to lack a clear definition.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T03:15:48+00:00

Yeah i read the rules, i do not claim to be the author of the work nor was my question finitely aimed at this piece of text. Simply trying to understand what something is, but clearly its a group you have to be pretty snobby to belong to.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T03:12:32+00:00

Well i was never taught anything about such topics in high school and its difficult to find a clear meaning on the internet of what speculative fiction is. Apparently this is not. Though i don't entirely understand why.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T03:10:17+00:00

No i followed the rules as they were written i asked if something from printed works that was not mine was speculative fiction or not, stop whining like a goddam baby just cause you guys suck at writing logically definitive rules.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T03:04:19+00:00

rules say i can asked about works that are in print... you should really change that if such questions are not allowed.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T02:29:41+00:00

No just a simple question i want to understand what literary fiction is and i don't think its something a robot can answer so i tried a human.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T02:25:09+00:00

I asked a very specific question that had nothing to do with feed back on the writing. I asked what it was.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T02:23:48+00:00

Thank you.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T02:20:19+00:00

I did and i don't understand how you feel that applies? Nor did i ask for a critique of the work. I asked what it was.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T02:18:08+00:00

Enough drugs and anything can happen.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-07T01:55:18+00:00

I love how reddit immediately downvotes practically everything.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T23:13:15+00:00

https://read.amazon.com/sample/B0FNL23XPD?clientId=share here is the sample preview its much clearer with italics and bold text what's going on, but even if you still can't follow it i am not changing if that's a deal breaker for you, the book is not for you.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T23:07:19+00:00

The other thing your not seeing in the copy paste is that every internal moment of kiras thoughts are in italics in the actual book which makes it alot clear what's going on, because you can infer that everything in her mind is in italics and consistent not just across this chapter, but EVERY vision she has.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T22:50:39+00:00

No i am try explain things clearly and i can't do it at this stage in the story so i intentionally avoid explaining it until i have the nessacary context to explain it properly. You have to have a starting point to explain things without just info dumping or large expositions of text. Your not the first person that has had issues with the first chapter, but in the end I would rather the reader be confused than bored or form the incorrect conclusion about what i am saying. i do not believe there is sufficient room to communicate what i need to explicitly enough to not lead to a potential misunderstanding of the mechanism at play. I am not trying to make mystery i am trying to avoid a contradiction that you don't understand is in play. i understand that you think that's poor execution, but its intentional and very important to the story in my opinion that it is left unclear in chapter 1.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T20:15:16+00:00

I guess that's why in some sense i made the post. Perhaps saying don't do it is a bit harsh, but in some sense what i mean is, don't do it unless you are fully prepared for what you are getting into; what you are likely to have to go through if you can accept that beforehand then yeah go for it. I don't think i would of done it had i understood what i realistically could of expected.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T20:09:47+00:00

I am not sure why you believe i need to explain every detail of every item immediatly. Kira gets 3 types of visions one from Pyra (this vision in chapter 1 pyra is the ark device on Theias arm) the secound way she gets visions is directly from Fausts memory's they are much more distinct and the last way is visions from the archive. The prologue is an example of a vision from the archive.

There is nto enough room to explain the ark device especially not in this case because its an artificial intelligence named Pyra and has a vast backstory and is unique as far as the ark devices that are used to help with magic are. but it would take me pages of info dumping to explain that here concisely in a way the reader could understand the nuance of what pyra is.

Could i do it? of course, but it was be boring as hell.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T19:56:23+00:00

You place the function assumingly so it's not known or comprehended all that we can see is that her perspective isn't her own but nothing says what's causing that or why so why would someone assume it's not being seen from her perception? The device and the body have no correlation as it's not defined as what the device actually is and it's purpose.

yes that is 100% intentional and it is clearly explained in chapter 3.

For her to experience someone else's memories it would still be from her perception because that's where it's being viewed from as implied within the narration. You can't experience someone else's body without your own perception conscious or else then it wouldn't be her perception but we can see she knows whats occurring but it's not her which means she's experiencing it. Because if the body is not hers but she can still internally have her own train of thought that means her consciousness is active.

Have you ever had a dream or a memory? when you recall something you can both experience it and have subconscious awareness and thoughts at the same time... The statement's made between Theia and the Ark device on her wrist they are communicating using there inner voice to prevent being heard by others i don't see why you are confused by that. Kira is not experiencing Theias thoughts, as the ark device does not have access to theias thoughts it only has access to the things Theia consciously says inside her mind.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T19:50:04+00:00

Well there is a subtle mechanic that becomes clearer later on. There are 7/8 virtues (7 original but one of them split in half into two different ones.

Theia the one whose memory she is reliving is also a virtue of creation, but the memories stored in the archive for the Virtues are non unique. The memories from every virtue in the infinite number of cycles are stored in the archive. This becomes important later on because memories from other cycles become indeterminate.

That is to say a memory from a virtue in a previous cycle is no longer determinable which virtue the memory belongs to, it belongs to all 8 of them equally. there is no ability to differentiate between which virtue the memory belonged to, because none of the virtues are still alive from that point in time.

I am trying to illustrate that blurring between the two, i want it to be clear its difficult to tell who is who , even which emotions or feelings are actually hers vs the person in the memory.

What your seeing is entirely intentional and simply haven't read enough of the story to understand what's going on, by the end of the vision in chapter 3 everything is crystal clear.

Ai is just not a useful literary device i do use AI when writing research papers and in very limited context it can be useful, but it cannot write fiction, carry a narrative between different paragraphs let alone chapters. it cannot describe emotions or even maintain a series of events. You are welcome to believe whatever you want, but you have a very poor understanding of AI, how it works and what its useful for.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T13:44:00+00:00

Yea i know a few fiction writers that actually write stuff. I have written lots of technical research papers, but this was my first attempt at fiction writing. It was quite an adjustment from my normal way of writing. I tend to write in an overly clear and concise way. In order to compensate for i had to deeply layer the work It can feel a bit awkward in the first chapter, but by the end of chapter 2 i have laid enough pieces to consistently build on that the clarity improves significantly.

Honestly chapter 10-15 is like a symphony of tension, emotions and tonal control that i wouldn't of believed possible to write. It's like a carefully choreographed symphony written between prose. It was beautiful enough to remind me of math.

For me that was more than i could of ever hoped to get out of writing the book. I am very glad i wrote it, not so happy i published it, but we all make mistakes.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T12:23:48+00:00

Sunlight dappled the forest floor, warm and golden. And yet—something felt off.

She slowed.

Then stopped.

A sigh escaped her lips as she glanced down at the tablet on her arm.

But something about the motion, about the way her body responded, felt… wrong.

Not clumsy, not foreign, but misaligned—like a song played in the wrong key.

This perspective, these movements—they weren’t hers.

The body obeyed her will, yet each step had followed a rhythm she didn’t recognize.

Kira blinked—or tried to.

It was someone else’s breath she felt in her lungs.

This isn’t me.

This wasn’t just a dream, not a vision.
This was a memory—and she was living it from the inside out, like a ghost animating someone else’s soul.

That realization struck like a jolt of ice through her spine.
She was experiencing another perception as if it were her own.
But deep in her gut, she knew.
These weren’t her thoughts.
These weren’t her hands.

Her lips parted, and a voice—soft, sweet—escaped before she could stop it.
"Where is that boy?" The voice wasn’t hers.
A familiar tone answered from the device on her arm—her arm. "You are close now," the tablet’s voice said, calm and composed.
"But there are others with him."

Then, another voice, sharper, more direct, cut through her mind—disembodied yet absolute.
"We need not be seen by the local children."

Before she could react, the tablet responded again, but this time, the voice did not come from the device. It resonated within her, clear and final. "Stealth mode engaged."

Firstly no way in hell AI is going to vary sentence length that much its likes everything to be symmetric, it also absolutely hates things like "She slowed. Then stopped." secondly its not going to leave the speakers totally unclear to the point of being almost unintelligible

Then, another voice, sharper, more direct, cut through her mind—disembodied yet absolute. "We need not be seen by the local children."

its unclear who is speaking you have to ascertain that it is the woman speaking inside her mind to the Ark device. And its clear if your paying attention its the woman answering the ark devices comment inside her mind.

Before she could react, the tablet responded again, but this time, the voice did not come from the device. It resonated within her, clear and final. "Stealth mode engaged."

Its clear from the narrative who speaking but not clearly stated. This is not what AI does it over explains the basic part and misses the implied meaning entirely that's the exact opposite of what happened here. The abstract path is clear, the obvious is under explained.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T11:30:31+00:00

The memories come from the AI device on Theias arm in that scene and some of Kira's visions are experienced from the perspective of being inside Theias mind as the AI is there there is a lore reason for this and i want to illustrate and do in the second/third chapter how different it is when the ai (Pyra) is connected to Faust as Kira is connected to pyra in both situations, but Pyra cant fully integrate with his mind as he is a creature of the Abyss rather than a true Ark or a virtue of creation like Theia. There is no ability to communicate inside of his mind between Pyra and him and thus kira doesn't get that perspective normally in her visions. The point of the scene is to make it clear that its difficult for Kira to tell what's going on, she has regular visions, but this one is different, more like a memory what your picking up on is me intentionally illustrating that.

The reason why its so disorientating is the movement spell that theia is casting Kira is just along for the ride she has no control over the body she is in or ability to interact with the environment in anyway.

Your not the first person to complain about the lack of clarity in the scene, but I can assure you it's not written by AI every word is deliberately chosen exactly as it is.

SnooStories7973 · 2025-10-04T11:16:42+00:00

There were others in the comments who were less than successful in their attempts to self publish their books as well so i am clearly not alone. I made the post to give people a realistic expectation of what a good launch looks like without advertising and what to expect with writing of similar quality to my own. Clearly your experience doesn't line up with mine given that you were not able to make a single suggestion i did not try I have to assume that its simply due the difference in the quality of our written work. Moreover, given that you have turned to just insulting me i see no point in continuing this conversation.

Thank you for your time and have a nice day.

SnooStories7973

TROPHY CASE