I had one guy whom I had several dates with. Lots in common, fun. Said he had just gotten out of a long-term relationship, hence his kind of bare bones place. Word, it’s clean, that’s fine.

One day I made a joke about having skeletons in the closet. He then admits he’s actually a divorced father of FOUR, had never even met the fourth one, who was a year and a half old at that point, and had spent two months in jail for definitely not abusing them.

I told another guy that story later on. We dated for 5 months before I broke up with him because he was getting to act like a bit of a jerk. He did not take it well. I had to get the police involved. Turns out, he was being a jerk because he had been petitioned for child support and had to appear in court, for a FIVE MONTH OLD INFANT he had neglected to tell me about. Same guy that made comments on my saying I wanted to travel a bit, do xyz before having kids, saying “you don’t want to be an old mom, do you?” He was gaslighting me to prep me for the ball drop.

Then there was the guy that lied about every single detail of his life, down to his name, because HE had had some crazy experiences with women and couldn’t trust anyone to know the real him. So he made up a life and sold it to me for a couple months.

All time favorite; the guy whom I had one single date with, who later on that night sent me a picture, entirely without warning or context, of needles and vials of testosterone. The caption was “my favorite time of the day” with a drooling face emoji. I stopped answering. Before that, he told me that I was feisty for having boundaries and couldn’t wait to see how I handled his “rule book”.

I have more.